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Subject: Reflections (reposted)

Author:
SJ

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Date Posted: 10:40:41 06/10/04 Thu
In reply to: Becca 's message, "E.C.O. moment" on 13:25:24 05/14/04 Fri

I wanted to reply to Becca�s post here on the list since I�m the friend she was referring to in her post.

First, I want to say that I have nothing but admiration, respect and love for Becca and I really appreciate the way Becca checked in with me about the post on Friday, before we began our evening.

I had read the post late in the day on Friday and when I did I felt cold. It felt my circulation slow and my body numb. I felt unsafe and misunderstood. I feared the impression that the post would have on others in the group and that it would change the level of safety others felt around me.

I trace these feelings to some processing I�ve been doing and realizations that I�ve had lately. I�ve realized that I feel comfortable when the image I see of myself reflected in others matches or exceeds my own self-image. When my reflection in others matches my self-image I feel present and in at ease. When my reflection exceeds my current self-image I feel empowered to improve upon myself and move toward embodying this elevated image. However, when the reflection I see of myself in others appears alien to me I feel uncomfortable and lonely, and I retreat from the environment that perpetuates those feelings.

I honor Becca�s openness and sharing of her feelings and at the same time I�m not taking ownership for the feelings that she conveyed. I believe Becca�s feelings are completely valid and I do not wish to diminish their validity by posting an alternate perspective on the frame. However, I feel that posting my frame on the same point in time will make me feel better and more understood. So, you see my dilemma.

Well, trusting that you understand what I am trying to do, and not trying to do, I feel I can (safely) move forward and post a frame from a similar point in time. Thank you for your indulgence.

---

I was observing Allyson�s demo and I couldn�t have been in a better seat in the house! I was sitting up front (just left of center) on a plush comfortable couch with two very attractive friends to my right. We were sitting together, feeling very comfortable with our bodies, and feeling the energy building in the house as we anticipated the beginning of the demo. I was holding hands at times with my friend to my right and she was holding hands with our friend to her right. At times we just rested our hands on each other�s thighs and felt the energy surging and swirling through the room as it entered one of us and then moved to the other through the contact of our hands, our legs, or just the ether.

As the demo got underway the energy continued to build. My two friends to my right were swept up in the flow. I felt my entire body vibrate with a low hum. I could feel the energy coming from all directions. Waves swept and circulated around the front of the room and the contact between us on the couch continued and appeared to augment the energetic build. At times I had my arm draped across the back of the couch and I could feel the energy coming from my friend to my right and our friend to her right as my hand hovered near. There was incredible energy flowing.

I held my hand over the crown chakra and third eye of my friend at the other end of the couch. I felt a ball of heat under my hand as I let it hover over her chakras and make light contact with those points. I moved my hand to my friend immediately to my right and felt for the energy around her chakras. As I moved my hand feeling for the energy I was drawn to make contact and I did. My friend gently took my hand and held it up, letting me know that this was detracting from her experience. I thanked her for her communication and settled back into my body feeling the energy of the room passing through it once again. Our energetic and physical contact on the couch continued as the ecstatic waves of pleasure coursed through us throughout the rest of the demo.

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