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Subject: Re: Hello


Author:
red_candle
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Date Posted: 12:51:50 09/23/04 Thu
In reply to: Shani 's message, "Re: Hello" on 11:07:42 09/23/04 Thu

>As for being mad at CaLi, I'm not. I just don't
>understand how people can justify using racial
>language at all, even if it's only when you are angry.
> Because it is going to come out some time when you
>it's not appropriate. The point that I was trying to
>make is why use a word (or language...like profanity)
>when you are angry if you say that you don't agree
>with it. That's all. I don't think anyone meant to
>attack her, but she was already having a bad time at
>work...so our confronting her about what she said
>didn't help. I hate that she felt attacked, but I
>would feel worse had I not said anything at all. So
>what can you do right?
>
>As for the question about Black people calling each
>other that and whatever. There can be several
>reasons. I, personally, don't use that word ever
>because I find it offensive. Some people may feel
>like the more that they use the word in a positive
>way, it may eventually lose it's sting and not be as
>offensive. And I think another thing may be like more
>of a "family" situation. For instance, if you are
>upset with your mom, you may say some really bad
>things about her to your friends. Now, your friends
>can agree with you or say something like "Yeah, I
>can't believe she did that!" or "That is so wrong!"
>etc. But you don't necessarily let your friends talk
>about your mom or anyone that you love in a bad way or
>show them in a completely negative light. I think
>it's the same principle. Black people can use that
>word when talking to and about each other because we
>are all connected (like a family) but no one else can
>do that. I don't know if you understand that. I know
>that may not make sense to some people, but that's the
>way it is whether it's right or not. Plus, do you
>really want to be able to say something like that that
>is so derogatory?
>
>So that is my answer, whether it makes sense or
>not....whether it is agreed with or not.

Shani,
well put... i like the comparisons you drew. using the 'N word' is a touchy subject and will continue to be but i think the fact of it is that if you can say it without personally feeling that it connotes something bad, then you are ok to use it. using it when angry or to show the entire race of black people in a bad light is obviously not at all acceptable. i really cant think of another word that has these sort of drastically different implications--where context means so much... as a white woman i am obviously not the authority here! just my thoughts...

Kiki~I'm really glad you decided to post and say hi! this is a really great board as i'm sure you'll find and it is a lot like a family. there are people here with a lot of different views of anorexia, bulimia, ED-NOS, etc. and at a lot of different stages in the disease... the best part (i think) is how everyone cares for one another so much. this reflects in our intense need to want the best for others, even if we don't know how to have it for ourselves. so make yourself at home!

xo
nicole

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Replies:
Subject Author Date
Re: HelloBasil16:47:42 09/23/04 Thu
    Re: HelloKiki19:22:55 09/23/04 Thu


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