| Subject: Disintegrating Marriage |
Author:
Mil
|
[
Next Thread |
Previous Thread |
Next Message |
Previous Message
]
Date Posted: 16:40:59 05/30/09 Sat
I am requesting prayer for my husband and our marriage. I have been separated from my husband for about a month. I moved out of our home because of mental anguish, anxiety, fear. I just couldn't take it anymore. We have been married for about 1 and a half years. Previously to me, my husband had a live in girlfriend for 5 and a half years whom he never wished to marry. During that time, he helped raise her 2 children. He considers these kids, his kids. His exgirlfriend finally left the home after she gave him an ultimatum to marry her. Just a month or two after that, is when we met. He was still seeing the kids. At first, early on in our relationship, when he told me about the kids and actually introduced me to one of them, I was ok with it. Shortly thereafter, his mom ( who would eventually become my mother-in-law) told me that I was crazy to let that relationship between him and the kids continue because it was trap from the ex girlfriend to get him back in their lives. It all made sense when the ex girlfriend found out that he was dating someone, she didn't let him see them anymore. Over a year went by and no mention of the kids. ( I did find out later that he tried contacting her several times ) I thought this chapter in his life was over. From August of last year to the present, it has just been a whirlwind. His communications with her increased incredibly during this time, through long phone conversations and text messages. At some point in December, She decided that he could start seeing the kids again. By this time, I had found out that her house was in foreclosure. You see, when she was living with him, she didn't work and her kids attended private school. He provided completely for her. It was baffling to me that during all these months, for a couple that NEVER argued or fought, the arguments were constant between us about this relationship. I had told him that he was opening a window to the devil, which he interpreted to mean that I was calling the kids the devil, To this day, he says he can't forget that. I was completely against this relationship for quite a while, but I finally gave in and told him that I would be willing to do it together. He never allowed for this to happen and said that would never work. I don't know if it was really him or if it was her telling him that she didn't want me around. Finally, in April, he recived a call from her saying that she didn't know why she was calling him, but that her mom was very ill in the hospital. He called me and told me that he had to go take care of the kids, which I understood. Instead, he saw the kids for 10 minutes and headed to the hospital at 2:30 in the afternoon and didn't come home till 4 am. Her mother did pass away that night. His white polo shirt that he was wearing, was full of mascara and blush. From that night on, everything went down hill very quickly. He felt like he needed to take care of the funeral arrangements, which he did. We didn't go on our spring break vacation because supposedly the service was going to be held during that time. I proposed to stay closer to home so that he could attend the service, while still giving our family a vacation. He said he didn't want to do that. That I should go and he would stay. I decided to stay with him. They never did the service that week, instead they put it off for another 2 weeks. By this time, the communication between my husband and his ex was constant. It was much more than just the kids. I even saw a text where she said that she was thinking of him. It got to a point where we were hardly communicating. All his communication was with her. The day of the funeral, we got into another argument because of some other texts that I saw and we agreed to talk that night when he returned. He said he would be back at about 9pm, but actually came home at about 1 am. As he walked in, he asked if I wanted to talk then or in the morning. I said then...and we talked. He announced to me that he had decided to spend all his available time with these kids and if that was ok with me, that was ok with him. So, I asked him to define available. He said.." all of it. After work, on the weekends...all of it. " In the days previous to this, he had told me many things.......That he felt that God was leading him to be the father to these kids ( They have a real father who sees them every other weekend and sometimes weekdays). He also said that maybe our marriage may have been a mistake. That if we wouldn't have gotten married then maybe he could have had that family back. That he wanted those kids living under his roof, to which I replied....what does that imply? I'm not a polygamist. He said he was struggling with all these issues and their answers and agreed to see a christian counselor. I set up the meeting and they met twice. That didn't seem to help. Anyway, it was all a mental torture for me, so I finally decided to leave. I confronted both of them, separately, after leaving. I love my husband and I miss him dearly. We are in the process of getting paperwork for a divorce, but I don't want that. I would like a reconciliation. I pray that God would reveal to my husband, clearly, what his role should be. That any soul ties or generational curses be broken. Just yesterday I saw my husband. He said that he missed me more than I know, but he doesn't budge. There are so many happy endings to stories like this. I would like God to use us as a testimony for him some day. Please pray for us.....for reconciliation and a new beginning. May God bless you all for this wonderful ministry.
Thank you,
Please pray for a reconciliation, for my husband to understand God's word and not try to interpret it in his way. For God to use circumstances in his lifento show my husband HIS will. ALso, for any soul ties or generational curses to be broken. For him to learn the value of a wife ( he's been married 3 times ) not including the live in girlfriend. And for God to reveal to me anything he wants me to learn from this.
[
Next Thread |
Previous Thread |
Next Message |
Previous Message
]
| |
Feedback: 