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Date Posted: 15:47:15 02/23/14 Sun
Subject: Raven Update 2/21/14
I'm hanging in there and doing OK. I don't always post about every event or issue these days, but for the most part I feel lucky to still be here. Yesterday ended up being a little rough on me and affected me more than I realized that it would (as the day wore on, I just couldn't get it out of my mind). One of the worst fears I had after this woman sent that incredibly thoughtless and even dangerous email to me, was that I prayed even harder that she would not continue to cause me even more pain. The ripple effects of what she has already done has been larger than you know. John and I both are doing our level best to get rid of it completely. Get it out of my system completely. We are only human, and so if we were made of hard drives and computer chips, we could easily remove it from the memory banks of a computer, but I am made of flesh and bone. Her remarks to me were that she sees these deaths happen anywhere from two weeks to a few months after she has had a vision. The backtracking from her has been unreal, but what was said in this email was NOT misunderstood (not by a long shot by those who have most definitely read it), and for those few very close to me who have seen it, trust me, there was no way to misunderstand anything in that email! If you only knew the exact circumstances, you would freak. You really would, but I cannot elaborate any further. If I could, you would say, Oh my God...OK OK...I get it now, Raven.....wow, but I can't. I would lose something far more important in my life (if she hasn't already destroyed that already in some way).
I wish I could tell you in what capacity I know her from, but I can't. I will tell you that the hits just keep coming, and it's as if I am being raped all over again. She lied (and I learned that she is very good at this) about the email she sent me, and if she is capable of this, she is capable of turning on the water works, and causing even further pain for me with someone who matters a great deal to me. If she puts a wedge in between this person and me, at this juncture, I have nothing left. You would have to know to fully understand, and trust me, you would. I thought I would never have to see this person again, but now I feel like the villain. It's a crazy situation, and only gets worse as time goes on. Please (if you truly care for me) do not tell me that you had hoped I would have moved on from this nightmare already, because trust me, we did. We stopped talking about it. We stopped discussing it. We had let it go. After a conversation I had yesterday, it was all new again, and I was given some incredibly stunning news about her. That lead me to realize that if she could lie so easily to me about an email that I had right in front of me for God sakes, she is capable of spinning anything any way that suits her to save herself at the expense of others who's very lives are somewhat in her hands. She is indeed very sweet.........................
I just need to regroup yet again and move this out of my bloodstream and get myself in the mindset that we will need to see her again. It would be too much of a hardship on us if we had to go out of our way and have our lives disrupted any further by her. I think she has done quite enough for one lifetime. There are certain things I need to do on a monthly basis and it's hard enough to do even that. I won't let her make life even harder and more complicated than it already is. The fear that I had after this happened, is that she might try and drive a wedge in between someone who is incredibly dear to me, play victim. and leave me to feel like the villain in the end. The only mistake I made was opening up a powerful email that I should have never seen as a cancer patient fighting for my life here. It's going to be tough, but the good outweighs the bad and without that good, I will have nothing. It's a very complicated situation. This person who is very dear to me, means more to me than anything she could have thrown my way, and if there is a true victim in all of this, it is most definitely not her! Stunning.......................!
I will smile, be respectful, and bite my tongue when I see her, and look forward to the positives, and there are many. Just really needing to vent here. Keeping stuff like this inside is more dangerous to someone like me than eating it and letting it implode........
I had done so well in not thinking of this anymore. I am back to square one, and now I feel like I am the villain here, and that's wrong on so many levels that there isn't enough time to write it all down. She is not going to force us to go somewhere else to get things done that I really must have done, and it's hard enough for John to take the time off for this every month as it is. We will face it down, and make Lemonade out of Lemons.........
She is not going to destroy a very precious relationship for me. She's done enough!
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