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Date Posted: 16:09:06 02/23/14 Sun
Author: GoodWillTalking
Subject: Please allow Raven to be human…

Someone dear to me said something a few weeks ago that really says it all. He said that if it feels wrong, it is wrong. If you feel something strongly enough, it's because there is something truly there and to pretend otherwise is to cause further harm on oneself. I have had some very well meaning people make remarks out here at trying times in my life about how I need to just remain positive and suck it up and yet on their own pages, I have seen these same people go completely berserk over much less. I think the advice he gave me was the best. He told me to listen to my heart and how something feels and to not feel that I must always suck it up and be the strong one. That I am setting the bar too high for anyone and that I will fall and fall hard if I do this to myself. It's so easy to tell others what you think they should do, but to be perfectly honest and frank, I am so bloody sick to death of being the one to smile graciously and be the epitome of grace and tact at all times while I am being smacked around like a fucking rag doll. Today I am angry and somehow it feels that it's the right thing to do at the moment. I'll go with that for now. I appreciate a lot of what has been said out here (not all, but most). God bless you for trying to help, but most importantly, bless those of you who allow me to feel human and angry and what comes naturally without any more wisdom than I can handle right now. Considering what I have had to deal with this past year, I am think I am plenty strong.............

I have just had enough today........

P.S. I hate you MRSA! I hate the Doxycycline I must start yet again today. Not feeling the love right now on any front. Royally aggravated..........

It only adds to the fun....

The one drug that can save my life causes MRSA every freaking time! Now this......! I think I am understandably on overload. Bad day.....bad.......

Hopefully I will calm down here soon. Miracles can happen you know.....This whole set of events has me angry, but my faith is still intact nonetheless.....

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