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Date Posted: 10:50:29 03/03/13 Sun
Author: GoodWillTalking
Subject: Raven Update 3/2/13

I KNEW as soon as I posted "Nothing to Post", there would be a message...I should have posted sooner!...

Here's Raven's message today:

Guys, I'm so sorry to worry you. I read a few of your notes just now, and didn't realize that some of you hadn't seen my last update. I should have left it out separately when I last went to chemo, but I left it out instead (now buried) further down my wall under Cat's beautiful note to me on the day we spent together (Thursday, February 21). I've been a bit out of it over the past week. I used to have my computer on all the time, but I check in, see what's what, and turn it off again shortly thereafter in most cases (never used to do that). It stays on for a bit, but nothing like it used to. Lately all I want to do is stay in bed and just sleep. I actually lost a day at some point over the past week. I honestly thought it was Wednesday, and it was really Thursday (I had slept through an entire day). This stuff is so incredibly accumulative. I start to feel a little like myself, and the spunk and vivaciousness returns right before a treatment, and then it feels like someone is stomping on me for weeks afterwards, and it grows slowly after each treatment is over. I am more exhausted now then I have ever been. We are now scheduling my treatments for every three weeks to see if that's a better balance for me, and yet still strong enough to fight the cancer. I pray this to be true because I want to see me again a little more than a day or two.

You guys are like angelic little elves leaving me such beautiful notes and pictures of pure inspiration as you do each day. You will never know how much they mean to me. There are days where I may check in for only 5 minutes, but seeing this kind of love and support is enough to carry me through that day. I'm only sorry that I can't always respond to each post like I used to (It's impossible now). I was able to do a lot before I started chemo, but much has changed (chemo has changed many things for me). I was talking to a dear friend recently and they reminded me that it was probably all the natural remedies and alternative medicine that kept me alive and so full of life, for as as long as it did, and then the cancer was just too powerful (It's too rare and too aggressive). It bought me "good" time. I felt pretty good except for all the surgeries in between.

I love you guys with all my heart and soul (as cliche as that may sound, it's true). Thank you for standing by me and keeping my spirits up. You are always telling me that you are my private army, but in truth, you are an army of angels. God bless you for taking time out of your own busy schedules to send me love and hope. I hope you have a wonderful weekend. Please know that eventually, I do read every post out here, but things are in slow motion here lately. I love you! XOXOXOXOXOXO! ♥


And here's Raven's message I missed, that was hidden in the comments section to a message posted by Cat Hickland:

Oh Cat! I actually had tears in my eyes when you finally had to go, but I knew it had been hours. You took a day that would normally be truly awful for me, and left both John and I smiling (he says he now understands why we talk forever when we get on the phone together)! I could have talked to you for hours! We had so much fun! I had tears in my eyes when you had to go, but I know in my heart we will see each other again. I promise you that I won't give up the fight. You give me courage and strength that comes from pure light, because YOU are pure light (and it was so cute how we made that new Oncologist blush)! LOL! He couldn't even look up at us for a few minutes! You brought a wonderful afternoon into my life, and that's because you are a rockstar!

We did not get out of there until 8PM! I was the last to go as usual. Having some yucky stuff right now, but I knew it was coming. A magical afternoon with someone who is actually more gorgeous in person if that's even possible, and with a heart of gold! Thank you for being there my beloved Kitty Cat! I love you (and John sends his love tonight too)! XOXOXO!

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Replies:

[> Re: Raven Update 3/2/13 -- JH, 00:11:30 03/04/13 Mon [1]

Thank you for keeping us updated GoodWill. We're all thinking of you Raven. I wish you so much happiness and light!


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[> Re: Raven Update 3/2/13 -- Laura (Love), 02:29:38 03/07/13 Thu [1]

Praying for you Raven. ♥


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[> Re: Raven Update 3/2/13 -- Hannah ((((Healing Light & Love)))), 10:35:15 03/09/13 Sat [1]

(((Dearest Ravenbeauty)))

There are ups and downs in any battle. I have great faith that you will win this battle, and I promise to walk beside you every step of the way - - - and with all of my heart.

Healing Light & Love Surrounds You! :)
Love you dearly!
Hannah


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