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| Subject: Re: friendship | |
Author: sweetsong | [ Next Thread |
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] Date Posted: 8/01/07 12:21 In reply to: sweetsong 's message, "friendship" on 4/01/07 12:26 thank you everyone for being here. well she still hasn't got in touch but i will try affirmations. i think i get a bit clingy to people how do you balance this sort of thing? im never meeting the right people and when i do i think i overpower them then i over analyse the whole time. how do you trust and go with the flow and know whatever will be will be when you have been hurt before? [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] |
| [> Subject: Re: friendship | |
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Author: zenwind [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 8/01/07 21:32 Sweetsong, *hug* I have always since a teenager been honoured to have friends confide in me and share their hearts with me; but equally have been hurt in the past when I have noticed that a few of them, when things are going well for them, may not contact me for long periods, that is until some other crisis in their life occurs and they pop up again! Now I used to be full of expectation, I guess without even realising it, on some level, I was expecting an exchange. I had my concepts of "friendship" based on what I viewed it as.....and when people didn't fit into this rigid framework I was upholding, I got hurt. I felt rejected. But I learned my friends aren't objects whose purpose is to fulfil my own concepts....and gradually over the years I came to know that experientially. I guess the moment we create something with our minds, all those "shoulds," the experience of being with a friend or ourselves properly...is gone. We see the thing in our heads, see the notions we think "should" happen and miss the wonderful reality of that living, breathing, beauty of life unfolding before our eyes. Never to be quite that way again. Ahhhhhhhhh, the magic! :) (don't miss it). That is not to say we cannot have people in our lives that share our way of relating, we can, but we cannot expect it from everyone. As others have said everyone relates differently to others and each relationship between people is unique. It takes time to work that out for each person we meet and time to see how the bond between us and others manifests itself. So don't take personally that which may not have anything to do with you. Trying to mind read others is self defeating.....struggling against the current hurts even more so. May Kuan yin bless you [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |