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>I also was in a one-sided marriage for 19 years. He >said he was a Christian but was very verbally abusive >towards me and our son. I stayed because I was >praying and hoping that things would change, and >because I believed that somehow divorce was the worst >possible things that could happen to anyone. Then >last summer he had an affair and moved out, and the >children (18 and 13) and I realized how much more >happy and peaceful our home was without him. I am >pursuing a divorce because he doesn't want to repent >or change his woman-chasing ways, and I have been in >prayer and in counseling with my pastor, and I truly >believe that while divorce isn't God's first plan for >a couple, He did make provision for it in the case of >adultery. And I can't reconcile His "abundant life" >with a life of misery and abuse for us. My pastor and >my parents have all said that what is important is to >forgive him, which doesn't mean saying that what he >did was ok or not that bad, but releasing him from my >judgment, which I am trying to do. And just because >you forgive someone, you don't have to want them back >in your life in the same relationship. Hang in there! > Seek the Lord in prayer and spend lots of time in His >Word and with other believers. God will direct you. >Divorce is not the worst thing in the world. God is >blessing me and my kids in ways I never would have >dreamed possible. I wish that my marriage had worked >out and that my husband had chosen to serve the Lord, >but God is faithful to meet you where you are and make >something beautiful and unique and exciting out of the >rest of your life.

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