="GFD: PROFILE ('Trevor')"= -- GFD: Those Who Crossed Over

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Stimulant Detection - As Trevor describes it, he has the ability to sense the desires and motivations in others as they occur. While never fully explained how strong this ability is within him, it has been clearly demonstrated that he can use it to read and predict the hidden impulses of both humans and vampires alike. Those detected impulses can be emotional, sexual, withdrawn, hostile, selfish...or any other 'catalyst' that exists, spanning all of human emotion. He can even sense when another vampire is thirsty for blood if tuned in closely enough. However, Trevor is not a reader, nor is he an empath. Trevor's abilities merely decode the possible 'reasons' for the suggested future actions and emotions of his targets. Whether the other person ACTS on those impulses or chooses to suppress them is a matter of their own free will. Trevor can only detect the stimulation, not predict the outcome.

"Ambition is a lust that is never quenched, but grows more inflamed and madder by enjoyment.�- Thomas Otway

It may be an easy assumption to think that Trevor is the 'bad guy' out of all the others at the lot, or that he is irreversibly wicked in some way or another. But he's not. In fact, it's more the opposite in a lot of ways...even if he refuses to accept that.

Trevor's attitudes on life and his existence in darkness have been more of a reaction to the life he's lead and less of his own creation. Is he an opportunist? Certainly. Can he be rather abrasive in his methods of getting what he wants? Definitely. But he's not evil. Not by a long shot. Trevor's attitudes and manipulative nature is his way of desperately trying to adapt to what he feels is the 'truth' about people and reality itself. Thinking that everyone is out for themselves, they only care about you for as long as you are 'useful' to them, and that it's naive to think for one moment that they would be willing to sacrifice anything of real personal value in order to save you if it ever came down to that. The world is selfish...in order to 'fit'...he has to be selfish as well. Trevor is trying to anticipate further betrayal and pain by beating others to the punch. His extra was developed from his constant distrust of people in general. He's lost faith in the good of mankind, and needs to know their motivations and particular 'angle' ahead of time...in order to avoid deception after emotion has already been invested. He pretends to be closed off to all affection...but he's not. He needs it just as much as he ever did before. He's just being MUCH more careful with it now. Careful to the point of barely caring about anybody that he thinks will ultimately leave him behind.

In his human life, interestingly enough, Trevor would have been even more popular in high school than Justin was. Good looking, intelligent, easily social with the other students...Trevor could have been a boy that graduated, went on to get a good job, and lived have the kind of life that most boys could only dream of. But something went sour shortly before his crossover into darkness...and that is where Trevor's heart took its hardest hit.

Adopted at a young age into a new family, with two older brothers who bullied him mercilessly, and biological parents who were completely absent from his life, it was Trevor's time away from home that gave him his most comfort. Falling in love for the first time with a boy named Kevin...Trevor made the mistake of feeling a connection with him that simply wasn't there. Kissing a boy who wasn't interested, and getting a severe beating for it. Rejected and alone, Trevor had his outside life, his only salvation, destroyed by being outed in front of the whole school and his community. An event that is believed to be the reason for his crossover into darkness. Trevor ran away from home, found a sire, and became the vampire he is today.

It's no surprise that Trevor experiences abandonment issues in his life, and is constantly looking for a companion that will somehow suppress those issues. Or at least distract him from them. But his growing caution and suspicion has made each failed attempt more and more difficult. Reaching a point where 'caring' for someone else and going beyond his own self serving needs has become a serious threat to who he is as a person. So he avoids that kind of involvement altogether.

Where Justin may be constantly struggling to do the right thing, and Rage might be all fire and brimstone against a world that has wronged him in every possible way...Trevor has simply abandoned both ideas entirely...falling into a stat of apathy concerning either one. The idea of reward through virtue, or reward through revenge...is a waste of his time. To Trevor, he's TRIED to be the good guy before. He's TRIED to do the right thing, he's TRIED to get angry and fight back, and has found that life has to be a self centered pursuit for him, the same way it is for everyone else who would gladly walk all over him to get what THEY want. Why not do the same before they get the chance? Trevor has played the rold of the good guy in his life, and all it got him was heartache and betrayal in return. So he simply doesn't see the value in struggling against his own instincts for the sake of being 'civil' anymore. To him, there's no reward in that. No justice. No balance. And no instant karma that is working in his favor. So why do it? Life can be an awful existence for the best of us. Why bother? Because of this, Trevor has deemed himself a champion of the harsh truth. Pressing buttons whenever possible. Exposing the darker side of the sugarcoated world that the people around him seem to be living in. He wants to be brutally honest. He wants the truth to HURT others, the same way that it has hurt him in the past. It may sound cruel to those at the other end of his perception, but deep down inside, it's Trevor's way of saving them from the painful illusion he once knew. Warning them to not be fooled by it, and to 'wise up' before they end up suffering as he suffered. With nothing but heartbreak and regret behind him.

Trevor's biggest flaw is his rapidly hardening heart, which he keeps shielded from the rest of the world. In his mind, he's simply trying to be 'smart' about his feelings and is absorbing each and every bad experience in his life as though he can somehow find the perfect formula to avoiding a true connection with other people altogether. He attempts to be ruthless, but he's not. Trevor, beneath all of that manipulation and die hard ambition....has a heart. Something that he protects fiercely if need be.

His first true love, Kevin, tore his heart in to, and basically ruined his life on top of it. Trevor was irreversibly damaged by that, and his heart formed a layer of protection around it to keep it from happening again. His second love was for another boy at the lot...Rain's younger brother, Gyro. But again, Trevor was rejected...and another layer formed. Attempting to learn from his mistakes...trevor tried again. This time with Taryn, attempting to manipulate and 'control' him in a way that would guarantee his companionship without the pain to follow it. But that proved to be pointless as well. The shell around his heart grew thicker still. He attempted an on again/off again, purely sexual, relationship with the blood dealer, Jeremy...but that proved unsatisfying, as he was looking for something more stable. It wasn't until he found Michael, his personal 'puppet' as far as love and affection are concerned, that he was able to care about someone without putting his wounded heart on the line. Michael wants to worship him. He will never leave him. Never challenge him too forcefully. Never reject his advances. In Michael, Trevor was convinced that he had found a 'safe' companion to accompany him in darkness.

It wasn't until Gyro returns to the lot, and his former vampire crossover, Taryn, falls in love with Justin...that Trevor recognizes how shallow a relationship based on one-way worship can truly be. And it has caused him much distress ever since.

Trevor isn't evil. Not by any means. But he has forgotten the person he used to be. He's evolved into something different, building walls to protect him from the pain of past regrets and mistakes. But he's not invincible.I don't think he even wants to be. He's simply living with a mindset that makes him believe that 'controlling' a situation will free him of the risk it takes to love someone other than himself. And it doesn't. At best...it gives him a glimpse of what love's potential really is....and what it could be...if he only allowed himself to let the emotions in once again like he did before he had been hurt...