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Date Posted: 16:45:19 09/15/07 Sat
Author: Tina (custodian) (wearning protective gloves)
Subject: Re: The Creation Theories of Michael Mepsted (3)
In reply to: Tina (custodian) 's message, "Re: The Creation Theories of Michael Mepsted (2)" on 16:44:17 09/15/07 Sat

After God had created the Universe, Earth, Sun, Sea, Land, birds, animals, man, fishes, Basingstoke etc, he rested (understandably) on his laurels (which had only been created a few days earlier). It has often been stated in the Bible that He is a jealous God, and this is indeed so. He is also very house proud (with good reason) and liked to keep things clean and tidy, so after He had rested for a day, he made sure that all his creation was well maintained.
As he got to his garden, he was horrified to see that all the plants had been trampled and eaten by herds of horses. "Damn you horses" He thought, and wondered about uncreating them, but by that time Adam had started using them for transport purposes, and they are carbon neutral (and produce good manure for the rhubarb) so He did a bit of lateral thinking and He decided instead to protect the garden instead. The fencing and railing was expensive (this was before B&Q) but at the end of a hard day, God looked at His work and was well chuffed.
The next day He went straight to His garden to check on His plants. And Lo! the fencing and railing had worked, none had been damaged. God was over the moon (which was the first and only such occasion of this achievement, no matter how many footballers say otherwise). He strode off to admire his successful handiwork, but was aghast to discover that the horses had used the railings and fences as scratching posts and had covered them in their white hairs (all horses were white originally). Well, God got pretty cross with those horses. He went straight up to them and had strong words with them all. But all of them stared blankly back at him whilst chewing the cud, as they do. This did not please God at all. None of them would admit to the damage. Like we said, He is a jealous God etc, and so He decided to teach those horses a lesson. He set about creosoting the fences and painting the railings. He made sure there was an extra thick layer of paint and creosote on. "That will fix the buggers," He said.
And that is how some of the white horses have black strips and some are brown.

I know this is true, I got it from the horses mouth.

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