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| Subject: Into the Light | |
Author: andy | [ Next Thread |
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] Date Posted: 04:15:49 12/15/07 Sat Eclipsed by hedonistic longings the world reverberates in pain Greenland shrinks enough to change the maps as the Northwest Passage reopens. It never ceases to amaze me how the power of greed can exceed the desire for humans to instinctively do what is right for each other and our future. Wars are all based on greed and hate. There is ALWAYS people there speaking in clouds of illusion, trying to convince the masses why there was really no other choice except to kill thousands of young people. The holidays are here upon us. It is at this time of year that I seem to love to dive into my cave. This year I have had some health issues and I finally feel the years that I have left behind me. No longer do I feel like a twenty year old boy in a forty-seven year old mans skin. I'm just fine with that. I've played hard and worked hard. I've done so many things in my life others will never have a chance to experience. I feel sometimes like I have already lived one life of eighty years and am now about to embark on another. I have been blessed by those around me and my children and grandchild are healthy and living in a country where (at least for now) their freedom and future seems secure. I have a large extended family that has risen up from poverty to a place where all the children now have a much better start at life. They are all growing up in functional households with love all around them. So, why is it that at this time of year, that is designed for great celebration, do I find myself so caught up in the things about humanity that seem to eat away at my core? Well, for one, I think it has to do with the whole idea of Christmas and how the season has become far too commercialized. I go to the stores and people all seem to be so stressed and rushed. They bump into ME and then look at me like I was the one moving too fast in the wrong direction without concern for who or what they might run in to. I think about all the people that go to work each day trying to make ends meet and still coming up a dollar short. I feel their pain (maybe based on my own childhood). I wonder how many of them are kept up at night stressing over how they are going to find a way to make Christmas morning something special for their children. I think about our soldiers in Iraq and all over the world. I think about the war itself and how much I detest that side of human nature. How there are thousands of children right here now who have lost a Father or a Mother who will be waking up this year on Christmas morning missing someone who was supposed to be there, sharing the day with them. I think about all the wrong in the world and how easy it is to bring a smile to someone's face and yet how few people seem to care enough to do it. But, most of all, in truth, I think about my MOTHER! My Mom, was an incredible, loving, and caring soul. She instilled in me ALL that is good about me. She loved more and better than anyone I have ever come into personal contact with. She was selfless. I lost my Mom thirteen years ago the day before Thanksgiving (which was her favorite day of the year). This time of year, I think of her so often it isn't worth trying to explain. She lives in me all year but, during the holiday season she is so bright in my life that I almost feel as if I now understand her great pain. You see, to love so much can actually feel like a burden. You begin to wonder why others don't care as much and the world can look so much darker through your eyes as a result. I get caught up in myself at times. I am a deep thinker. This year though, I think I am going to find a way to take all of this emotion and thought up to a new level. You see this Global Warming stuff that's going on. Well, I have been doing a lot of reading about it over the past few months. It's a time bomb ticking and it's time I did my part in letting people know that it has the potential to be far worse for us than all the wars combined. It's astounding that there are still people leading us that feel as if it's just fine to keep on ignoring the facts all in the name of greed and ignorance. This year I am going to make a commitment to expanding the truth about the potential hazards Global Warming pose to our planet and its people. I am going to make it a point to get involved somehow by joining an organization, or starting one of my own. I am going to do my part in spreading the news, knowing that inside I will feel like less of a victim, so long as I don't ignore what I already know to be true. My Mother, she always felt like a victim, and that's the only thing about her life that she should have changed but, probably didn't because she never saw the light there to lead her in the right direction. I can change that in my life and I will. I will because I love My Mother and miss her more than these and ten million more words could ever say. In all of our journeys and tribulations there is always a light somewhere shining that will call us to it if we look for it hard enough. Today, I found that light, here in my cave. I will walk towards it until I can hold it in my hand and shine it right back upon the world into the eyes of someone else who is walking in the darkness tripping on their own feet feeling like a victim themselves. and that should be enough for any man, especially a man like me. ajs [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] |
| [> Subject: Re: Into the Light | |
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Author: Tammy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 08:06:10 12/15/07 Sat ***Tears*** Andyman, you have voiced much of what I hold inside, and have never found adequate words for. This season is too commercialized for my own liking. I often wonder, and have stated a time or two, what happened to Christmas values? Why does it mean we need to put the biggest or most expensive things beneath our trees? I was blessed with understanding the true meaning of Christmas spirit handed down to me by my grandparents *smiles*. They instilled in me, all that is good as well. My heart aches for those that have lost loved ones, and will miss them on this day as well. For the children who have no parents, are lost, alone and afraid. For those that are homeless, not by choice, but by mere circumstances. For those that are not financially able to compete in this race for Christmas. For me, for my kids, this is our celebration. I thought I'd share it with you. My youngest son, bless his heart, says to me, "Mommy, I don't care what Santa brings me, as long as it's a surprise." He's not greedy, nor selfish. My children when asked, "Why do we celebrate Christmas?", will answer you this, "Because it's Baby Jesus' birthday!" Then, you can ask them, "Why do we get presents?", and they will quickly say without a doubt, because Baby Jesus isn't here in person, he died, so all the kids in the world get to open a present for him." And then you ask them, what do you do on Christmas that's special or different from everyone else?", and they will say, "We buy a Christmas Cake, because it's Jesus' birthday cake. We put a candle in it and sing Happy Birthday Baby Jesus. Then we get to eat birthday cake." You see, for many years, I've detested the commercialism of Christmas, and always longed for a Christmas in the Country, where we pick our tree, cut it, and then light a fire in the hearth, and decorate our tree together as a family. In reality, on Christmas day, I prepare food, and we celebrate by going sliding in the snow, and having fun. We come in and make hot chocolate, make popcorn and watch movies all snuggled up together. We eat, relax and remember why we have this special day. We bond stronger as a family on this day. That is the gift that this day gives to me and my family. That is how it should be. I refuse to rush around and buy all kinds of things, but will definitely think of something special for each one in my family. I don't rush, I don't stress, and there is always a worry that there won't be enough money, but every year, they end up with more than I thought I could afford, so I stopped worrying about it. I just let go and let God. *smiles* Andyman, I know your heart is big, filled with so much you'd love to share, give and do in life. You are filled with so much life, that is shines outward to all that know you. I'm honored to be here, to be your friend, to know that the man inside, is about as wonderful as they come! So you sit back, and enjoy the SPIRIT of Christmas, in any which way that brings peace to your heart. That is Christmas in my eyes. I love ya bunches Andyman. Happy Holidays to you and yours.... From the North Country... Big Jug Hugs, Tammy |
| [> [> Subject: Re: Into the Light | |
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Author: andy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 20:27:36 12/17/07 Mon Tammers, Somehow, you explaining your Christmas here didn't surprise me at all. You're awesome! Be back full force tomorrow! Just sending out the warning! LOL hugs, andy |
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Author: Sasha [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 10:43:07 12/15/07 Sat ~ (((((((((Andz)))))))) I read through your blog post and it filled me with such warmth and pride in you - and like Tamz, I was deeply moved by your post. You often speak of words being larger then the space they take up...well, this post is a fine example of that...your energy, conviction, and passion is a deep and overflowing well, and no matter what the topic or tone, I just love to read you. Your mum did such a wonderful job, you're a very special human being, my dear dear friend... (((((((((((lotsa love 'n' healing))))))))))) Sash xxxx  . |
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Author: andy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 20:29:28 12/17/07 Mon Hi Sash, My wonderful Kiwi partner and friend! Sorry for leaving you hanging here for a few days. You've done a great job keeping things up so thank you but, more than that thanks for taking the time to read my thoughts and leave me such a warm reply. I almost miss ya! LOL NO, screw that, I do miss ya! much love, me |
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Author: Sasha [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 10:42:41 12/18/07 Tue  hahahaha you plonka! thanks for the morning giggle, Andz... *love 'n' kiwi hugs* Sash xx  . |
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Author: Janel [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 22:51:29 12/17/07 Mon Andy, You are truly an inspiration to us all, in so many ways you touch my heart and you always move my soul deeply, I am so blessed to have you in my life, my world is brighter because of you. (((Big tight huggs))) Much love to you, Janel |
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Author: andy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 08:25:38 12/18/07 Tue Janel, There is so much gratification to have a friend who appreciates you and lets you know that they matter. I thank you sweet one for letting me know just that. much love, andy |
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Author: AnneMarie [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 09:26:10 12/18/07 Tue Andy, I'll make this short as I can't see past the tears to type anyway. You are BEYOND incredible and MORE of a man then most will ever dream to be. You've touched my heart and soul and rendered me speechless. I stand in awe because of you... It's evident your mother shines in your heart and you in hers. What an astounding lady she was...and in heart still is! If only the mothers of today could be half the woman as she, this world would be a tremendously wonderful place. Although, I never knew her, I know in my heart that you are a mirrored soul reflection of her. Both of you are what love is...completely selfless. My best and all my love, AnneMarie |
| [> Subject: Re: Into the Light | |
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Author: andy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 22:39:45 01/01/08 Tue Ann Marie, Hi there hot stuff! Sorry I didn't get to this until now. You give me too much credit. That said, I am touched by your words. It's comforting for me to be able to express how I feel about my Mom. I look back at her life and just shake my head and think "Who the hell else could have done what she did?" The answer is always not another soul and thank God for that! thanks so much! much love, andy PS> I need the infomation about your book release date and where it can be purchased so I can post it in our announcement forum. Get it to me and then I will get you what you are waiting for. zooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmm |
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Author: Shalah [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 10:08:43 01/02/08 Wed I'm not sure how I missed this until now. It's been a busy time here, as you know. But this is beautiful, as is the heart of the one who wrote it. I hope you are having a wonderful year thus far and I hope you carry with you the warmth of the knowledge that I'm here... loving you.... always. *huge hugs* ~Shalah |
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Author: andy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 05:24:26 01/04/08 Fri Shalah, I always feel you near. Geography has nothing to do with it. Love you much and thank you babe! andy |
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