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| Subject: A Gypsy's Tale | |
Author: Stormheart | [ Next Thread |
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] Date Posted: 16:56:11 01/15/08 Tue A Gypsy's Tale Amidst the smell of woodsmoke, painted wagons circled round, underneath dark starry skies, outside the edge of town, firelight flickered softly; conversations hummed. A guitar was playing gently as someone slowly strummed. Spoken words went silent as the music filled the night. Men with glistening eyes sat in flickering firelight. Suddenly before them stepped, from shadows ebon span, a maiden dressed in scarlet; darling of the caravan. A smiling, sloe-eyed beauty with silky raven hair. No man had ever tamed her, this wild, exotic mare. she moved with sensual rhythm; an elusive, haunting motion. Her scent of musk and amber-a seductive lover's potion. Her tiny feet were charming as she padded 'round the fire. Anklets made of jingling coins inflamed the men's desire. Movements soft and subtle, meant to catch one young man's eye, became a brazen dance beneath the starry moonlit sky. The music made her bolder. As she shook her tambourine she spied her heart's affection; caught his eyes of emerald green. As she moved around the circle, a whirling vision of desire, her dance became hypnotic, setting all who watched afire. She danced before the young man, her skirt and silks a whisper; her heart aflame with love for this man who'd never kissed her. But sitting in the shadow, body filled with jealous rage, sat a man with deep obsession for this lass just half his age. This man worshipped the maiden who danced before the lad. his jealousy engulfed him and finally drove him mad. He rose from his position and quickly drew a knife. His heart was bent on murder; meant to take the young man's life. His hand drew back and snapped forth; the knife flew straight and narrow. The gypsy lass saw winging, toward her love, that silver arrow. With a cry, she leaped between, to stop the sting of death. The blade entered her tender heart. She gasped with ragged breath. A cry arose from two men...both the killer and the lover. One escaped in darkness; one man stayed to cover the warm and bleeding body of the gypsy lass, so brave, who would never dance again for the love she died to save. Shannon Mahalko (c) 11/2005 [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] |
| [> Subject: Re: A Gypsy's Tale | |
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Author: andy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 13:41:21 01/16/08 Wed Ussually this isn't the type of poetry that I am attracted to. Not much on fairytales and the like. That said, the structure of the verse lends itself to my liking. Your word choices flow so freely and the story line is never cut up or misplaced. I admire your pen much and in this case I actually appreciated the story too. So very well done! thanks, andy [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Stormheart [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 14:32:36 01/16/08 Wed Thanks, Andy...it's always nice to know when someone appreciates something they don't normally like to read...it's kinda funny about this one...it was sparked by a passing nickname my favorite poet/friend called me once, since I'm a truck driver by trade...he called me his gypsy poetess...the word gypsy stuck in my mind, and within 1/2 hour, this was on paper...I love it when it happens like that! :D [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
| [> Subject: Re: A Gypsy's Tale | |
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Author: Max Hardy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 13:58:15 01/16/08 Wed Hello Stormheart I just loved the flickering sensuality of this tale, and the saddened sting in it's tail. Vibrant in it's sadness. Max [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
| [> [> Subject: Re: A Gypsy's Tale | |
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Author: Stormheart [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 14:34:13 01/16/08 Wed Thanks, Max! I'm glad you stopped by to read! Sometimes they come out of nowhere, like I said in my remark to Andy...and they are usually among my favorites! So happy you liked it! [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Sasha [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 17:32:17 01/16/08 Wed ~ awwww this was such a cool story line, Shannon I could see it all so clearly... so beautifully painted, and in only half an hour? wow!!! I am soooo glad you're here and sharing with us... loving this one entirely, although I really wanted the young green-eyed lover to kick that killer's arse..lol so beautifully penned, dear one... *warm hugs* Sash xx  [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
| [> [> Subject: Re: A Gypsy's Tale | |
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Author: Stormheart [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 19:38:35 01/16/08 Wed Hi, Sash! Thanks for your sweet comments!!! Who know, maybe he still will? LOL! Sometimes poems come to me and I get on a roll, and they just flow from the pen...other times, it takes a while to get thought to paper...I'm kinda strange that way... ;) Hahahaaa ((hugs to you)) [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |