Camelot Sun Times/News Brief & Classified Ads -- The Black Watch

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Date Posted: 17:09:51 04/10/01 Tue
Author: Nancy
Author Host/IP: NoHost / 205.188.197.59
Subject: Camelot Sun Times/News Brief & Classified Ads

Camelot Sun Times - Online Version

News In Brief

The Earl of Holloway is so concerned over the massacre at the Columbine Monastery that he is considering banning longbows from all schools. The Earl quoted: "Longbows are too easy to load. Crossbows take more time. Monks could have taken care of the shooters with their staffs had they been using crossbows." Longbow manufacturers could not be reached for comment.

The Armorers strike continues into the third week with no end in sight. Spokesfreemen for the United Armorers Guild say that General Armors refuses to bargain with them and that their chief negotiators threaten to turn them all into toads. The negotiators say that this is not so, and whoever is spreading rumors such as those should be disemboweled. However, parts are getting low at G.A. dealerships and the company is threatening to outsource parts. No word has come in on the Guild's reaction.
�

Classified Ads

Help Wanted

Now hiring extras for movie "A Leige of Their Own." See Casting Freeman at back lot of studio IV.
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Wanted Inventory Specialists! Must know Abacus. See Thomas of Wessex at the Inventory Guild.
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Are you ready for a fast paced career in the fast food industry? Tastee Gruel is hiring all positions and all shifts.� No experience necessary.� Applcations will be accepted at the Market location as well as at the new store in the mall.
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Wanted: Camelot Sun-Times needs Scribes! Great benefits, good pay. Must know Scribeperfect 6.2 or Microscribe Word. Scrollmaker experience helpful.
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Serfpower Temporary Services needs loborers for long term project. Ask for Chuck.
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Temporary positions need to be filled! Wanted: journeymen tinkers, tailors, stone masons, joiners, and craftsmen. Good pay! Start immnediately! Ask for Richard of Aragon up at the castle.
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Help Wanted: Catapult Testers. No experience necessary.
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I can't keep up with business. I need apprentices. If you're a self starter and interested in joining a fast growing company with plenty of benefits, good pay, and lots of travel, maybe sorcery is for you! Apply today at Marvin's Magical Establishment. Must know Hexcel.
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The Plague Has Increased My Business So Much I Don't Have Time To Sleep!!! I need gravediggers, body haulers, maintenence engineers, as well as office help in purchasing and accounts receivable. With people dropping like flies, now's the time to get into the rewarding business of Mortuary Sciences. Apply at any one of my Death N' Stuff Locations, including the new office in the Valley.
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Education & Business Opportunities

Learn to scribe in your spare time! Ask for free brochure.
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Learn a trade and find a career! Enroll now in the Jester's Institute.

Real Estate

PHASE III IS HERE!!!! Tired of the fast paced jousting life? Looking for a place to retire to in the country? Le Grand Vue Estates is offering choice real estate for lords and their ladies! .5 acre lots. Lots of room for the kids and steeds! Come to an open house on Sunday, Midsummer's Eve.�
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Beautiful one room hovel for sale on 27 Mud Lane. Thoroughly modern mud and stick design, must see to appreciate. It's a steal at four cows.
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Castle For Sale.� Great history here, the Castle Sauvage has survived no less that three sieges. It comes with its own moat, chapel, and keep, as well as its own village just outside its doors. Better hurry, castles like this don't stay on the market very long.� Contact Renee, your Century 9 Realtor for the West Country and Wales.
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Things To Buy/Sell

Suit of Armor for sale. Used once. Slight hole in chest. 20 gold pieces OBO.
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Lost/Found

Sword missing. Answers to Excalibur. If found, return to Artie up in the castle. Reward offered.
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Other Sundry Stuff

Now!! Get the latest in personal and hovel protection: The new FIDO5000. Protect home, property, and self. The FIDO5000 will do it all! Free demonstration. Ask for Biff of York at Protectron.

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Medieval Campground Rules

1. Discharging of arrows, spears, swords, halberds, catapults, arbalists, trebuchets, siege engines, battering rams, or Trojan Horses strictly prohibited
2. Jousting is permitted only in designated areas
3. There is to be no burning of witches at campfires
4. Religious conflicts are strictly forbidden (unless combatants can produce signed authorization from the Pope)
5. No permanent structures or fortifications are permitted: including (but not limited to) moats, walls, towers, keeps, or barbicans

Payment is in four chickens per night, two chickens for each extra cart. If there are any questions or problems, see the Lord of the Campground.

Nancy LOL

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Replies:

Re: Camelot Sun Times/News Brief & Classified Ads -- Terry, 11:47:55 04/11/01 Wed
- Re: Camelot Sun Times/News Brief & Classified Ads -- Nancy, 15:39:26 04/11/01 Wed