Re: Do you consider yourself to be a "strict" parent? -- Spank with Love

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Subject: Re: Do you consider yourself to be a "strict" parent?

Author:
Beverly

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Date Posted: 17:07:21 09/26/12 Wed
In reply to: Bob E. 's message, "Do you consider yourself to be a "strict" parent?" on 20:06:22 09/25/12 Tue

Hi Bob. I'm Bev. I see that you have 8 kids... They must keep you very busy! How do you do it? I have trouble keeping up with one rambunctious 13-year-old.

If setting boundaries and enforcing consequences when the rules are disobeyed makes me strict, then I guess I'm a "strict" parent. We too have written down our house rules, and our son knows when he doesn't follow the rules, there will be a consequence. We use a demerit system and follow through with the appropriate punishment. It may include grounding, loss of privileges or a spanking.

We live in the South, where spanking is probably more common than where you are in the N.E. I give most of the spankings in our house since my husband has to travel a lot with his job. It's not the ideal situation, but we make it work. My mother-in-law helps out a lot as a caregiver/baby-sitter for my son. She enforces the rules too and spanks when necessary. She is strict but fair.

I hope other parents like you will join in the dialogue at this forum. I think we can all help each other. Best wishes!

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[> [> Subject: Re: Do you consider yourself to be a "strict" parent?

Author:
Bob E.
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Date Posted: 07:57:24 09/27/12 Thu

Hi, Bev!

We actually have 9 children, counting our daughter who was born a month ago, not 8! How do we do it? With the help of God! Yes, we are a religiously-observant family; we are Orthodox Jews. I think you will get another view of myself from a response I gave to another one of your posts, Bev.

We have family relatives that help us as needed, I hire teenagers from the neighborhood to supervise when we have birthday parties, sleepovers, etc. I am also blessed in that I have a job that allows me to work from home whenever I wish, to a large extent. (The fact that I own the business and am the President\CEO helps!) Often, I can work in the middle of the night when the house is quiet, for example. My job also enables me to afford a large family, thank God! I am also able to function on four hours of sleep per night, and I suppose that helps us manage things.

The biggest thing, however, is the fact that I LOVE BEING A DAD! Of course it can be frustrating! And, there are tasks (spanking) that are far from pleasant. But, when administered in the proper way, I think they can actually serve to bond parent and child. I am by nature a rather patient person, and this has been augmented by my training. But, Beverly, I enjoy nothing more than coming home from a long business trip, opening the door, and being confronted by a stampede of children rushing to jump into my arms! When that happens, any problems from my work just instantly melt away! What more need be said?

I am delighted that the Parents Forum has been established; I think it is a concept that is long overdue. I sincerely hope that only true parents will be posting here, and that it will be kept "clean," that is, free from fetishers and some of the absurd issues that are posted on some sites dealing with issues such as spanking. If this is done, I will look forward to coming here! Kudos to the Moderator for undertaking the added workload to manage the site!

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