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Date Posted: 06:30:14 11/05/99 Fri
Author: Cupid and The Lethal Weapons
Subject: The show WILL go on!
(The scene opens in the darkest depths of the familiar warehouse that Cupid and the Lethal Weapons call "home". The interior of the building seems to be fairly well-lit. Panning around the room, the camera finds that the light seems brighter due to all the holes in the walls. There is still the sound of destruction heard in the distance and screams of anger come from every direction. Suddenly, a voice is heard.)
Voice: Hey guys. Hatred. Rage. Cut it out for just a second. Come here. I have news for you that I think you'll both love hearing.
(The camera follows the sound of the voice until it finds Cupid. He is wearing only his wrestling tights. He doesn't notice the camera and continues to speak.)
Cupid: Hatred. Rage. GET OVER HERE!!!
(From out of the shadows steps the two behemoths that are just dying to wreck havok upon the TTSWF. Their eyes seem to glow in the darkness of their surroundings. The air is fiiled with the scent of bad breath and body odor. The camera shudders just a bit as the cameraman remembers what happened to him the last time he came in contact with these two monsters.)
(They walk over to Cupid to hear what he has to say. The camera zooms in closer.)
Cupid: Guys, I have news for you that I think you'll absolutely love to hear.
Hatred: (in a low-pitched, raspy voice) This better be good. I was having fun back there.
Rage: (matching Hatred's intensity and voice) Yeah, I was actually starting to not mind the cancelled cards.
Cupid: Just listen. I just heard a few minutes ago that The Slinger and 'Smutman' Jack Leer are planning a non-sanctioned pay-per-view tournament. They've set matches and everything.
Hatred: (with growing anxiety) What's that got to do with me?
Rage (getting angrier by the minute) Or me?
Cupid: Well, you guys are scheduled to face Cold Steel.
Hatred: (in an almost-happy tone) You mean..we actually get to crush them anyway.
Rage: (ecstatically) Damn, and I thought we'd have to go on smashing all this stuff that isn't fightin' back. I can't wait. When is it? When is it?
Cupid: It's scheduled to take place next Saturday, November 13th.
Hatred: (in a somewhat disappointed tone) You mean, we have to wait over a week to get our hands on them. Damn...oh well, I guess that's life.
Rage: (with a sort of analytical tone) 13th? Hmm...that's interesting. Cold Steel will be crushed by us on the 13th of the month. I kinda like it.
Cupid: It's good to see that you boys are finally happy. Ok, now you can go back to smashing things...if you must.
Hatred: Hey Rage. Let's go in the back and wrestle each other. That might be fun.
Rage: Ok, you can be President Vengeance.
Hatred: Oh no, you're gonna be President Vengeance.
Cupid: Why don't you guys go have a match to decide who's gonna be that back-stabbing prez of ours.
Hatred: Ooooh, good idea. Let's go.
Rage: Ok, but don't hurt me again like you did last time. That damn chickenwing move hurts.
(The two retreat into the depths of the warehouse to wrestle one another.)
Cupid: (to himself, with a chuckle.) Imbeciles.
(He shrugs his shoulders and walks the other way. The camera fades to black.)
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