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Subject: Re: Who's here?


Author:
Jamie
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Date Posted: 20:17:09 01/19/14 Sun
In reply to: Jamie 's message, "Re: Who's here?" on 20:08:36 01/19/14 Sun

Wow idk what happened it just copied and pasted it^^ haha any who.. My HOCD started just a month or so ago. I was on a bus ride home and my friend was talking about how her brother was gay and he just stuck to the church and didn't date guys. My first thought was "he's a Christian and he's gay, I'm a Christian what if God wants me to be gay?" Of course this causes serious anxiety as I DIDNT WANT TO BE GAY!! Not at all! The anxiety subsided and I stopped thinking about it for a while. I went to church shortly after this happened, and there was a girl in front of my with a nice butt and I remember staring at it and thinking "wow I want her butt" and then the HOCD kicked into full gear shooting thoughts saying "that was very gay thought, why are you obsessing over her butt, why can't you stop thinking about this, you're obsessed because it's true" they were all lies. I know this now and I still have trouble deciphering the lies from the truth. I stopped going out and cut many friendships in half to avoid "maybe falling in love with them". Is that even possible? But now I go out it's still really hard. I don't get as much anxiety as more worn out ness. It's frustrating and takes up my life. I am skeptical about ERP because I can't really determine what is causing my anxiety. But I'll have to see, sorry for the long post.. Blessings xx

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Subject Author Date
Re: Who's here?Scott11:41:50 01/24/14 Fri


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