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|Subject: Re: Polyamorous Triad Marriage|
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Date Posted: 21:41:16 01/11/18 Thu
In reply to: Lonagin 's message, "Re: Polyamorous Triad Marriage" on 16:01:01 04/24/16 Sun
"....Marriage is between TWO (2) people. Anything else is nonsense. .... "
Au contraire, mes compagnons,
As already noted, there hav been several repressive restrictions on who can marry who, racial, gender and who's on top, mostly created by religious leaders, many of whom secretly violate the very rules they have imposed on their sheep.
When those coercive taboos fall, we find that Black and White couples, Japanese and White couples, Protestant and Jewish couples, girl-girl, as well as boy-boy couples are quite able to live happy faithful lives till death in its obtrusive way, doth set them apart.
As to what would I do, that is impossible to say. Love is a very strange, unfathomable emotion, especially by observers outside a particularly happy relationship.
Science has made great strides untangling the way DNA controls our choices and will perhaps decode the chemical program completely within another generation.
What I would do might be gleaned from some of the things we did do when we were younger.
My wife and I camped in my new VW van which I fitted out with a bed and a Coleman stove, a port-potty, a cabinet for kitchen utensils and oter things needed for comfort. For several years we travelled around New England as well as up and down the East Coast from Florida to Maine. We often brought friends along, occasionally a couple but more often one of the girls who worked for me.
I had an auto-repair business business with several young employees. At some point I began hiring females to operate the fuel portion ofn the business. At the time prevailing opinion was that auto shops and gas stations were an all male business. So I was, as far as I know the only such shop that had young girls employed in what was considered too dirty, too raucous, and sexist an environment.
But when one of the daughters of a good customer was insulted when she answered a "Help Wanted" signs at one of those big high volume gas stations, I hired her and then a second female so that neither would feel alone. For the record it was a great decision. The various young ladies who worked that part of the business had remarkable customer skills.
Anyway. over the years I got to know most of them fairly well, often listening to their problems with boy friends, as well as their families.
Seekiing a safe place to sleep at different times one or more of thee girls would drive to our house where my wife and I were always ready to take them in for a night, a weekend or several months.
That led to them accompanying us on weekend jaunts. Sleeping in the van or the tent I might set up at a campground required some familiarity and eventually physical contacts. We explored the triad idea, and tried things out but never really established a firm long term relationship. Lying togrther on a plastic mat under the stars on a clear night naked but for a warm blanket and someone's heiney presing against my belly, was hard to not be open and confide in one another. Even if we were enjoying the mega-billions of stars and lulled by the crashing of the nearby waves, sooner of later some form of sexual fantasies crept into the discussions. Not all the conversations were imaginary and soon personal details were the subject.
And just to be honest, while skin to skin contact did open up sexual ideas, very few actually ended in coital contact.
One thing that I did learn was that the percentage who had been abused in some way by brothers, older cousins, boy friends and even fathers was far higher than I had ever imagined. Having had some bad experiences with an older relative, with a priest, plus my mother's crazy notions of sex, religion, nudity and what they called self abuse, many of which I've written about in this or other forums, I feel I was able to listen and offer non-judgmental empathy. Sometimes even good advice and help.
Some of the stories they told, often teary eyed, would curl your hair. Everything from mild shoving and unnecessary profanity to being forced to engage in oral sex by an abusive father.
I often wrote here about being spanked as a child and teenager, but I think my experiences were love taps, usually for cause, compared to being beaten with a wide leather strap or very flexible switch of some kind.
One of the girls came to work one Monday morning walking with pain, her eyes red and the sorrowful look in her eyes that said everything. Her father had come home with a bar stool friend, both three sheets to the wind. Over the weekend he had made her mom do a strip dance and perform oral sex on both men. When her ministrations to his limp dick could not provide the relief he required he had then taken his strap to her mom. Later,since mom was a disappointment her father forced her to try and was rewarded for her failure with welts from the top of her heiney down the thighs almost down to ten inside of her knees.
As usually happened the suggestion to call the authorities was usually met with fear and her begging me to be sient. One girl who had called the local CPS did cause an arrest and misdemeanor conviction but general condemnation from other members of her family. She was harassed so much that she eventually moved to the west coast and severed ties with most of her family.
My wife and I saw the welts and I drove to our house as she could not work. She told her story and I remember we had her lie on her abdomen so I could softly apply a soothing ointment (Probably Calmoseptine, which has a cooing menthol effect).
When my wife and I married we were considered to be hippies, wandering around in my VW camper, ( One of four over the years.) having moderately wild parties, hosting younger family and friends for nude swimming weekends, cousins with their boyfriends and sometimes one or another of these employees.
One of the girls came and lived with us on and off for several years, attended the home birth of our children, and had one of her onw births there as well.
I had the idea that we might figure out how to have a triad family. as my wife treated her better than a best friend. However she met a decent young man her age and they were married in our backyard one balmy afternoon ceremony with guests, her family by a minister who performed home weddings.
After they married and found a ploace to live things went well for a while until they lost the place (Actually an illegal basement apartment.) and we took them both back in for a year or so. Eventually they did divorce, but by then we hade sold my busibes and both the rental house and our Five bedroom Colonial and moved south 1,300 miles.. However we still write and talk on th phone as well as use Facebook. The triad idea was talked about and we did get close to making it work.
Mingling in and out during those days the girl whose drunken father I mentioned before who beat her so badly. In my fabtasy plans she would have been invited to join us in a community marriage, but the circumstances just never came to that conclusion.
At least she acceteded being spanked and spanking as much as I did, But even there while I could surrender control to a good bare heiney strapping, she just was not like my sister, strong enough to be dominent of her own accord. I always had to suggest that I had been naughty again and deserved punishment.
Once in a while we talk on the Skype thingy and I willuse a belt myself as she listens. We had been using the Samsung TV so she could watch and comment, but I've taped over the camera lens since they were susceptible to hacking. I don't mind discussing this in this forum, or with a few choice friends, but would rather not go public.
I have long regretted that in some ways we were thirty+ years ahead of the times.
PS:: I just reread Lonagan's comment and realized I misconstrued it's meaning. But my story of our ideas still stands.
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