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Subject: Spanking shame Author: Debbie [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 20:30:20 10/31/22 Mon In my teen years, I developed a spanking fetish which I did not talk about it to others. I have been sort of ashamed of my love of getting a spanking. Do you all have these confused feelings? How should we live our lives knowing that we have the spanking fetish. Should we search for partners to act out our sexual fantasies and desires? How have all of you coped with your spanking fetish? [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Kev [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 13:47:29 11/01/22 Tue Hi Debbie. No. I do not have any of these negative associated thots nor emotions. You know how I am dealing with it? By putting up a few personal ads, introductions, etc. I mentor select women from time to time. enquire within pls. I'm looking for a long term rel/mar too. Yes, I would say, as long as you are not putting yourself, others, at risk of injury, and that you are not breaking the law, go for it. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: SJ [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05:06:22 11/02/22 Wed I sympathise, Debbie, it's a difficult dilemma. I've been fascinated with spanking since I dreamt about it when I was around 6 or 7. Obviously, I couldn't tell anyone about it, so had to make do with occasional newspaper articles. Once I grew up, I usually attempted to interest a current girlfriend in the noble art, but got rebuffed with one wonderful exception. Although she was dominant by nature, she was more than happy to make frequent trips over my knee, nothing too serious, but great fun. Things became different with the advent of the internet. I got to know of spanking clubs, and answered ads in magazines and on cp websites. Unfortunately, I usually had to pay for the privilege. Nowadays, a stick mainly to contributing to sites like this one, although I do occasionally meet a lady I call Miss Norway (she's Norwegian!) for a bit of hotel fun. Obviously, for a girl it's different. I certainly don't recommend advertising, it's too dangerous. Finding a like-minded boyfriend (or girlfriend) is possible, but not easy. I don't know how old you are, but maybe you could get you mom to start. I think it depends on whether you want discipline or fun spankings. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Debbie [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 12:40:49 11/02/22 Wed Do you think that shame helps to create the spanking fetish we have. My best guess is that the fetish comes in part due to the fact that we are so secretive about it. Suppose if we found our names identified in the media as having the fetish. Would we still have it? [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: SJ [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 07:41:10 11/03/22 Thu Thanks for replying Debbie. I'm not sure shame is quite the right word, but the secrecy is possibly part of the thrill. Although I've had the fetish most of my life, very few people know about it, effectively only those with similar feelings. If it every became public knowledge, how you deal with it would be interesting. I'd probably deny it for as long as possible, but really, admitting it would not be such a big deal. I've been "getting away with it" for so many years that it has almost become a parallel life, not actually linked. That's why I virtually never spanked my own kids, just in case I got some pleasure out of it. If you read Anja's post, you will see that, by accident, she actually "struck lucky!" Luck, may have a lot to do with your success. For example, some years ago, I met a new business client , to whom I formed a sort of attachment. We were in a pub having lunch and after a couple of drinks our tongues loosened a bit. She asked me if I had any other interests I hadn't told her about. I said there was one but I couldn't possibly tell you. She replied, go on there's no-one else around. I took the plunge and told her I was interested in spanking. Her immediate reply - Ooh, would you do that to me. And I did, on a number of occasions over the following few months. I was offered an opportunity many years ago which I declined. I regret it to this day. I'll tell you about it if you're interested. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Anja [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05:20:52 11/03/22 Thu I was lucky enough to be able to live out my spank fetish for a long time. I was born in Germany in 1952 as the second child. I had a sister six years older than me. I often felt the cane from my mother. When I was about eleven/twelve years old, I couldn't wait to be caned. With a lot of fear and at the same time with a lot of anticipation I looked forward to the spanking. By the time I was thirteen, caning became less common. When I was alone, I would take the cane and spank myself, but unfortunately it wasn't like my mother had spanked me. One day I thought I was alone in the house and took the cane to spank myself. But I wasn't alone, because suddenly my big, grown-up sister was standing in the door. I hadn't noticed her because my back was to the door. It was only when she cleared her throat that I noticed her. I was terribly ashamed because I had also taken off my skirt and panties. She had probably been looking at my bare bottom for a long time. Later she came into my room and told me not to be ashamed because she knows the feeling. She offered to cane me if I felt the need. She did that for many years. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Debbie [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 14:22:02 11/03/22 Thu How would react if everyone you have contact with knows that you have a spanking fetish? [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Lukas [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 07:01:48 03/19/23 Sun I had jumped into a black hole in the earth and never appeared in public again. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Lukas [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 07:12:06 03/19/23 Sun Hi Anja, Fortunately, this embarrassing incident ended well for you. I wonder if your older sister or others satisfy your needs to receive punishment today? [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: DennyJames [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 15:25:24 11/10/22 Thu I started dating my wife at 16 and we spanked each for the next 30 years. We never advertised or told friends, family, etc. When she decided to trade me in for another man she tried to use it against me. No telling how many people she told of me having this 'terrible' fetish...She told our young adult chidren to who didn't care at all, In fact, my oldest son told her, 'Maybe you should try it, you might like it', and no friends or anyone else ever mentioned it to me. Now I'm too old to care, so what if other's find out. Everybody has some kink hidden away. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Blange [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05:51:54 11/13/22 Sun Hello: Jill Keenan is always talking about spanking in her youtube videos and labeling spanking fetish as a sexual orientation. She is talking about it and has not stopped talking about it. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Blange [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05:55:43 11/13/22 Sun Look uphttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H42KUKut1HI [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Berryblue [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 08:15:00 11/13/22 Sun She also goes as far as to try and add it to the LGBT community 😂 Like i see where she's coming from but it's a decent stretch to call a fetish a sexual orientation because it's not sexual for everyone. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Rainy [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 19:37:31 11/14/22 Mon Many people have a spanking fetish. It is not surprising at all. Just enjoy what you have and not worry about what other people say. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Alfred22 [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05:46:52 11/15/22 Tue Excellent counsel but giving it the "fetish" label is possibly to sign on to the conventional wisdom that there is something different or non-standard about it. "This thing we do" is one attempt to find an improved label. I am not sure it works. I like to think that the interest in all things spanking is an evolutionarily inherited advantage I was hard-wired to have. True, IMHO, but it begs a bunch of questions. Perhaps I should ask: "Does anyone else have issues with calling that interest a "fetish"? [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: CarlaH [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 15:52:56 11/16/22 Wed I don't like the term fetish either. It denotes an obsession. I think you can enjoy something without it being an obsession. Why not? My husband and I love spanking, but we don't do it all the time. We can become aroused the shower, or other ways without spanking. Maybe it becomes a fetish if that's the only thing that arouses you? I do not know. I am no psychologist. I believe I was hardwired as well. I was interested in spanking as far back as I can remember. Seeing my dad playfully spank my mother in the kitchen, when I was a little girl, may have been a catalyst, but it did not push my sister into the spanking world, as far as I know. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Alfred22 [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 12:24:34 11/17/22 Thu CarlaH makes a good point. The term "fetish" seems to suggest an excessive interest or even an obsession. Having a totally vanilla sister with the same parents as you have does count against the proposition that interest in spanking is inherited. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: Rainy [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 17:50:14 11/17/22 Thu Hard to pay attention to the words. Many indigenous people in North America were called "Indians" because the first explorers to North America erroneously thought they reached India, so they called the people they met Indians. Hard to define a spanking fetish because no one really understands how it originates. Nevertheless, a large segment of the population has a spanking fetish. Yes, most people who have a spanking fetish are reluctant to talk about it, but then again how many people are willing to talk about their sexual activities in public? [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Spanking shame Author: CarlaH [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 20:14:28 11/17/22 Thu Very true Rainy. I think you are right about a large number of people having a spanking fetish. I've casually mentioned spanking while at the local bar with friends, after the talk has loosened up a bit. Surprisingly, I've had more women than not, react with widened eyes, a smile, and a quiver or sway that originates in their hips and goes all the way up. I don't often do this, but this is my experiences from the few times I have and I've never pushed the subject beyond that. I was more in hopes that they might. You are right, it isn't something we talk about easily with others. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]