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Date Posted: 23:47:32 11/28/01 Wed
Author: leslie
Author Host/IP: 24.164.129.38
Subject: Re: Thank you
In reply to: Michelle 's message, "((((Leslie))))" on 23:25:01 11/28/01 Wed

Michelle,

I would like to thank you for your kind words... I am not so sure I want to get through this but I do know that I will speak with my doctor. As for my husband. This is my third marriage, my first was a wife beater, my second, an addict. My husband got laid off in March and has not found a new job yet. He is depressed himself, and I only add to his feelings of worthlessness. His feelings will pass when he gets a job, but mine will not. I cannot tell him how I feel. I tried that before and he said all the wrong things. We wound up fighting and he called my sister and she wanted me to go to the hospital. He feels so helpless. He knows that nothing he can say will quell my feelings. My sister, well, I know she knows what I am feeling.. She has been there, but nothing she says helps either.

My father was a manic depressive... bipolar and sometimes I have the feeling I am too. Sometimes I feel I can accomplish anything... I plan and scheme and hope and then dont do anything about it cause I feel after that I cant do any of those things. I could only fail.

Like I said, I dont know yet if I want to get better. Dont feel bad, that is just how I feel right now. Im not sure how that will ever change, but I go on for now.

Again thanks for saying you care. Thanks for listening.

Leslie

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