Re: "Blind Faith" -- Poetry Grace and Insanity

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Date Posted: 21:00:43 02/19/00 Sat
Author: Dimon
Subject: Re: "Blind Faith"
In reply to: Paul Douglas 's message, "Re: "Blind Faith"" on 10:23:34 02/13/00 Sun

>Hey, thanks man. I will take that advice to heart, compadre. I never looked at it that way, but now that you mention it...the meaning and context would remain without the overt articulation thereupon. I think I will do away with that, and put something together along the perameters you suggested. Thanks Paul....

Beautifully written; I felt the sorrow and hurt ridden
> within these words. There is an ease and flow to your
> poems that expresses such emotion, and carries through
> dazzlingly in all your work. My only question would
> be if the message in the words would resonate moreso
> if you changed the one verse to
>
> >You're soft cry permeates
> >in all this poetry
> >we both know so well.
>
> thereby strengthening the overall passage with
> deepness by leaving out the email bit. I understand
> it changes the underlining theme somewhat, but it
> reads with more power, to me, with that change. Dwell
> on it because I see it would take the poem into
> slightly different terrain, but perhaps for the
> better. Otherwise, a very fine piece of work. Hope
> this helped...
>
> Paul
>
> > The last few months
> > have been rough, I know,
> > and it seems to me
> > you're begging to let go.
> > You're soft cry permeates
> > my email,
> > and all those poetry sites
> > we both know so well.
> > Subtle hints hidden
> > within lines of reason...
> > I know what you are thinking,
> > I understand how much you hurt.
> > I'm asking you, please just look upon
> > these bloody palms
> > held up with shame,
> > and try not to shudder.
> > Try not to shy away, agast.
> > Try not to convince yourself
> > that this time I've spent
> > away
> > was just a merciless game of heartbreak.
> > Hold on to those memories,
> > and try to hold on to me.
> > This blood-letting should end soon,
> > and we can stop pretending,
> > we can live that perfect dream,
> > I promise.

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