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Date Posted: 26/02/08 10:16pm
Author: Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Subject: Re: New Kinda Nigerian Scam..
In reply to: Reginald Arbuthnot 's message, "Re: New Kinda Nigerian Scam.." on 26/02/08 3:40pm

Reginald,

You present an interesting dilemma, bullet or rope?

While either will indeed bring the result you seek you may want to go for a more "hands on" approach, might I suggest a garrote it's quite, unlike bulets and there is no need to find a sturdy tree limb or street lamp. Not that I have any first hand knowledge of these sort of things mind you. I might also suggest not using too thin of a wire lest Seamus O`Flacherty loose his head. I think you'll agree it would be best if the remains were identified so as the send a message to others who may seek to try a similar scam.



Sincerely,

Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law

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Replies:

[> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> Re: New Kinda Nigerian Scam.. -- Reginald Arbuthnot, 27/02/08 3:57pm

Roger

Sounds certainly worth pursuing. Sorry to be blunt but do you know, or maybe employ someone suitably burly and vicious-natured enough to perform such a task? I`d ask the mother-in-law but she`s a bit tied up at the moment overseas. An all expenses paid trip by me. I`ve heard the caves of Sicily have a certain charm this time of year:-).

I was thinking maybe Mr Kneebreaker would be a suitable candidate. If the name is anything to go by i`m sure he would make sure a thorough job is done and don`t worry too much about the evidence, I have an uncle who owns a pig farm in Scotland.

Please let me know by return if my plan sounds feasible, then perhaps we can discuss a verbal contract, fees involved
and whether uncle McDougal would need to be disposed of to tie up any loose ends after dear Seamus is taken care of.

I look forward to hearing from you and you have my word that I won`t mention this to anyone else.

Regards

Reginald Arbuthnot


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[> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> Re: New Kinda Nigerian Scam.. -- Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq., 27/02/08 6:42pm

Reginald,

Well you certainly seem single-minded in your desire to take care of Seamus, and the pig farm in Scotland would be ideal. It’s a shame your mother in law could not do this for you, as I am sure it would benefit you greatly in the future when the shrew started up all it would take is flashing the photographic negatives to quiet her down. Is she a bat fancier also, I wasn’t aware of Sicilian bats?

Mr. Kneebreaker would be delighted to take a trip to Scotland, he was asking if your Uncle McDougal could lay in a supply of single malt for the occasion. In that way there would be no need to “wrap up loose ends” as you say as your uncles memory would be fairly clouded the next day.

One of my other associates Hamidi Azzizi the sausage maker is also interested in your proposal as a matter of fact he suggested your Mother-in-law should be included in the plans. Is there a discreet way you could have the old Sow bundled up and delivered to your uncles pig farm? Hamidi says he would take care of both of them for one low fee and donate the finished product to the local orphans’ home. In that way everyone comes out ahead, you get what you want and Hamidi gets his charitable deduction credits.

Sincerely,

Hon. Roger Q. Shlockman III Esq.
Shlockman, Sueman, Kneebreaker and Stall
Attorneys at Law


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