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Date Posted: 09:43:38 10/02/06 Mon
Author: Reese
Subject: Inside
In reply to: Braden 's message, "inside" on 09:29:49 10/02/06 Mon

(When she was finally able to do so, she made a soft 'sssh' sound, deep in her throat, her hand moving over the back of his neck soothingly. She realized now just how much torment he had gone through, why it had taken nearly a full week for him to be able to look at her straight.. and why he had been so viscious in bed that night. The way he kept apologizing to her made her want to hold him all the more, to take the pain from him.. but she couldn't.. He had made her realize, rather painfully, that she couldn't help him.. but she could damn well be here and offer comfort whether he would take it or not.) You've done nothing wrong, Braden.. please stop blaming yourself.. (She sobbed the words, clinging to him as though he were life support.) I'm sorry I told Remy about everything.. and I'm sorry I was such a bitch the other night.. and I'm sorry I brought Cody into the apartment.. But Braden.. you didn't do anything wrong. (She didn't want him to doubt himself.. that was worse than hiding the pain.. he had no reason to think less of himself for what had happened, and even though she finally understood why he did, it didn't make it easier for her to accept that. It seemed like for a few moments they were just trading apologies, but perhaps they just needed to get some things in the open. The sound of his voice when he apologized the final time broke something in her heart, and the feel of his lips against her neck drew an impossible warmth inside her.. and the contradiction of the two emotions had her lifting her head a little, a tiny hand cupping his cheek.) You couldn't have saved him, Braden.. and I don't hold you responsible for that.. and you shouldn't either. Keegan died doing what he loved, and I miss him so fucking much it kills me.. but you didn't kill him. (Her eyes were soft, compassionate, tender.. it was breaking her to see him in so much pain.)

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Replies:

inside -- Braden, 10:04:52 10/02/06 Mon
- Inside -- Reese, 10:13:13 10/02/06 Mon
  - inside -- Braden, 10:41:55 10/02/06 Mon