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Date Posted: 15:47:40 01/05/02 Sat
Author: Miami Herald Reporter
Subject: Stickman has been found!!

My name is iJuana Playthe-Gitarman. I didn't want to release my name because of the investigative work I do,
but I have decided to retire from this line of work and become a superstar!

I am glad to report to you ladies, that I have located Guitar Stickman. You were right Suni, he was in Pasadena, CA.; he attended the Rose Bowl and was in a headbanging match with some Cornhusker Fans. With my assistance, Guitar turned himself in to the police. The charges were dropped because it was proven to be self-defense. It seemed, he was recognized by some fans and when they charged
him, he had no alternative but to beat them off. (Think about it..having no clothes for them to pull off, he didn't want anyone grabbing at his wanker or placing a corn husk where it didn't belong!)

He wanted me to tell you, he cannot return to the MB until he buys a new guitar.
(The other one broke in the scuffle with the fans). He doesn't want to play a lead guitar anymore. He is switching to the bass. Let me start at the beginning.
He told me a story; something I feel I should share with you.

He said his precious autographed picture of Ivan Doroschuk (former lead singer of Men Without Hats) came to life. He tried to ignore it, but the continuous visions and thoughts, off the The Safety Dance continued to haunt him..so after several appearances, he answered. He said
Ivan was disturbed to see his career gone. He had a proposition for Guitar. Come to California, join
his new band. The HasBeens. Guitar was insulted at first, but decided to hear is idol out.
It seems Ivan only wanted to break your beloved Guitar Stickman into pieces, beyond recognition.
Ivan was jealous...jealous of his fame and constant demands on your website. "Why, why, why," is
all he could ask. Stick knew he was in trouble so he left, running a fast as he could down California Boulevard. He was picked up by another once famous band member, bass player, John Taylor of Duran Duran. John gave him the inspiration needed to find a Rogaine distributer, grow his hair, and chunk it blonde in front and wear it like the lead singer of Flock of Segalls. I admit, it sounds scarry,
but I think this is a good thing for Stick. He needs to "find himself."

He made a promise to come back when he finds what he is looking for. IF you want to communicate with him,
just email me, iJuana at: DiskoSksRockRulz@muzac.com

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Replies:

[> Re: Thank you so much... I'm so glad you found him... I guess he will come home when he is ready.... Just let him know its ok if he wants to play the bass :) -- Gaily, 20:07:50 01/05/02 Sat


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[> [> Stickman can go screw himself for all I care! We gave him a good gig on our website and he is acting really ungrateful... -- E, 20:27:48 01/05/02 Sat


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[> This is terrible iJuana! We all miss G. Stickman so much...Hey, do you think one day VH1 will do a BTM special on him? Maybe I can be on TV, cause I know him! -- Tammy, 21:42:03 01/05/02 Sat


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[> [> Re: ROFL at T!! No T they will just want to borrow his albums... hehehe -- Gaily, 21:55:49 01/05/02 Sat


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[> Damn right about that Gail! One thing is for certain, no matter how much VH1 begs me, I will not send in my home video of Stickman! NEVER, its just too precious to me! -- Tammy, 22:09:32 01/05/02 Sat


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[> [> Re: ROFLMAOPIMP.... I'm not even gonna ask What Home Video... OH BOY... do I know where you would go with that.... NOT!!! -- Gaily, 22:27:26 01/05/02 Sat


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[> Okay...I admit it. Me and the....Stick made a Pamela/Tommy Lee video. I know, its shocking, but hey, Zach Hanson is still a minor and I needed to get some..Bad, REAL BAD! -- Tammy, 22:51:02 01/05/02 Sat


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[> [> Re: TAMMY!!! OH MY OH MY.... We're NOT gonna go there... OK???? ROFLMAO... -- Gaily <---------- just loves the way this is a Leif/F8 site and she talks about Zach Hanson hehehe, 22:54:51 01/05/02 Sat


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