Author:
prinncesss
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Date Posted: 11:22:15 12/28/01 Fri
>Hello..... I am a Christian who is going through very
>difficult emotional times right now. I have been a
>believer for 26 years. Married for 25. Three kids.
>Gainfully employed. Pretty healthy. Yet I am sad.
>
>I'm stuck. I can't seem to get past a certain point in
>my Christian walk. Things go well, I get sad. Things
>start getting beter again. I'm not so sad. The sadness
>does not ever totally go away. People don't know
>because I am a pretty up type person. But lately, the
>sadness is refusing to leave. It results in my
>throwing up my arms spiritually. I stop reading my
>Bible, stop praying, and find myself doing a lot of
>daydreaming to escape the sadness. You can even post
>on Christian forums to escape. It's easy to engage in
>faceless, non-personal conversation.
>
>I deal with anxiety disorder. Have had it full blown
>for about six years. Take medication to help me when I
>need to do things that produce panic or anxiety. Have
>always dealt with unreasonable fears. Started with an
>alcoholic father. Seems typical, doesn't it. With
>agoraphobia or anxiety disorder you also deal with
>depression which is worse than saying sad. The result
>is you withdraw. I can get by without being around
>people. Not anti social, just how I have always been.
>
>I have been having problems just going to work for the
>last several months. I've even lied to my boss and
>wife with how I spend my time. I'm in sales so I'm on
>my own all the time. As long as you sell, no problem.
>This year my ssales were finally affected. I would
>spend time sleeping in my car. Could be at a park or
>even at the cemetary. I have no death wish, but the
>cemetary is quiet and peaceful. I sleep because my
>medication makes me tired. Oh how I wish I could just
>quit at times. But I can't. Sometimes I think I need
>to take some sort of leave. I'm not really sure. Maybe
>I just need to get to work. I was actually awarded as
>salesperson of the decade for the 90's.
>
>My oldest son is gonna marry a non believer and I feel
>badly about that because I feel I let him down. My two
>other kids aren't showing much of an interest in their
>faith either. They are 23, 19 and 16. I'm feeling
>overwhelmed by all of this.
>
>Not so surprisingly, God has chosen to use me in the
>life of others. I am an assistant pastor and everybody
>seems to admire and respect everything I have to say.
>I get the opportunity to teach now and then and the
>Lord really blesses it. My Pastor and I are great
>friends. He would really hurt to know I am hurting so
>much now. I know I need to talk to him.
>
>I found this little site and it seemed like a safe
>place to post. So if you would, pray for me. Thanks
I am so glad you came here so that I might have the opportunity to pray for you.
Dear Heavenly Father,
I lift my brother up to you Lord. He is in need of your mercy and comfort. Lord, You know what is in my brother's heart. You know the cause of his sadness. Father I ask that you shed light on the cause so that he might better know how to deal with it.
Lord, Your child is weak and restless. He is in need of the refreshment only You can provide. Father pour Your love and mercy and comfort down on my brother right now. Take his down casted spirit and make him whole again Lord. Father speak encouragement into his heart. Let Your Holy Spirit speak to him when he's under attack with anxiety. Let him know You are there to take them away. Father, I ask that you take this anxiety from my brother as he casts them up to you. I ask that you stand by your promise to take them away when he gives you his burdens.
Satan, I come against you and declare my brother as off limits to you! I rebuke you in the name of Jesus, and I cast you back to the pits of hell where you belong! You are NOT welcome in my brother's life and I bind you and cast you away from him right now!
Father, I thank you for the authority You have given me, as Your child, against satan, and ask that you place a hedge of protection around my brother. Protect his mind, his heart, his soul and his body, Lord.
Lord, I lift my brother's children up to you. Father, I place them in Your loving and ever guiding hands. I ask that the seeds planted in their lives take hold and that they come to You in their time. Father I pray for their salvation and in Jesus' name, claim it on their behalf.
Lord, thank You for sending my brother to me to pray for. I thank You that Your will be done in my brother's life. Father, give my brother rest and restore his heart and mind.
Give him peace and restoration. Strenghten him for the work You've called him to do Lord. Bless him abundantly for his act of faith in having a fellow Christian pray for him.
Let Your will be done in my brother's life.
In Jesus' precious name,
Amen
Brother, I would like to encourage you to trust in the Lord that He is faithful to do all good things in your life. It is important that you do your part as well. Cast your anxiety on Him. When you feel like avoiding prayer and Bible reading, take a stand against satan and pray against his efforts! He wants nothing more than for you to be discouraged and find any other form of escape than turning to God. He wants that because he knows the implications. Don't let him win!
If you raised your son up in the Lord, then, please don't blame yourself. All is not over with yet. The Lord will work in your son's life. As long as you raised your children to believe and love the Lord, and gave them a good foundation, you should not blame yourself. Just pray for them and guide them.
It is important to surround yourself with other believers. When you are all alone and isolated, satan has a better angle on you. You need to be encouraged and uplifted. Don't isolate yourself. Talk to your pastor, and reach out to others for help. I think fellowship is essential, lest you forget there is encouragement.
PLEASE read the post Karen provided called, "Father's Love letter." I think you will find it encouraging.
Please know that the Lord loves you and will certainly help you! Know your part in receiving help too!
Let me know how you are doing. I will continue to pray for you.
God bless you brother,
Prinncesss
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