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Date Posted: 15:54:17 08/19/04 Thu
Author: Grateful UBF Member
Subject: Re: Off Topic Board
In reply to: Denial is Bad, Criticism is Good! 's message, "Re: Off Topic Board" on 14:55:46 08/19/04 Thu

>I agree with you that getting UBF to admit the bad things that have happened in the organization would be wonderful. However, the problem is that UBF is not a person, it is an organization of many people. I know that some hard core UBFers would like to see this happen, but others would prefer to keep things ‘quiet’. This is very Asian in behavior and can be seen in many Chinese/Korean/Japanese households weather they belong to UBF or not. I’m not saying that this doesn’t exist in America either, I’m just saying that it’s very cultural to keep things ‘quiet’. For me, I will not sit quietly and let something like what is happening to E at *IU pass by quietly. I wouldn’t let it happen on the street, at school, or at UBF. A crime is a crime, I don’t care how you slice it!

One thing I have learned in life is that denial is a very strong emotion and that getting people to admit things can be very time consuming. I deal with people that have drug addictions and I could hold my breath until I am blue in the face and still these people would not admit to their addictions. That is even if they have lost their job, family, home etc. From their point of view, it is us who are wrong. Just watch Michael Moore’s ‘Bowling for Columbine’ and you will see some examples of denial. The important thing is that the law is the law. I don’t care who you are, you could be the King of UBF, this does not excuse criminal behavior. For me, I’m trying to work from the inside. I use the group prayers as a forum to express my thoughts. For example, when we study how so and so fell prey to sin because they desired worldly goods, I’ll say that the issue is not in getting rid of all my material possessions, but the solution lies in where I place my values. I say things like “thank you Heavenly Father for reminding me that my priorities should not lay in material things, but that they should be with You. Some people like what I say, some don’t too bad, I don’t care. I only care what God thinks.

As for the pressure tactics – This is a tough one. I don’t think that pressuring someone to quit school (for example) for the sake of UBF is a good thing. The problem is that unfortunately some people have had hard lives and are more vulnerable to peer pressure. These people are also vulnerable to a whole host of pressures that are out there, whether it be drugs, excessive consumerism etc. UBF is actually just another organization/person trying to get us to do what they want. We just have to use our judgment. When shopping for a TV, I don’t believe everything the salesman says. I’ll shop around and refer to multiple sources. I do the same with Religion/Spiritual guidance.

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