Subject:  The King and Queen of the media? |
Author:
Gina
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Date Posted: 13:49:34 03/03/09 Tue
Wow! that is SAD. I bet trust and loyality is hard to find in their Kingdom!!
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Brad and Angelina get on everyone's nerves
Written by, Cordula Schmitz
Are their six children the product of a happy partnership or are they fashion accessories? Is the humanitarian work in the name of social conscience or image maintenance? And will they ever take any risks when accepting film roles? Cordula Schmitz thinks Brangelina are big phonies.
Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess called Angelina who met a handsome prince named Brad. They fell desperately in love and had beautiful children together. And that’s the story of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, also known as “Brangelina”.
The story could end happily-ever-after on Sunday night at the Academy Awards Ceremony; both have been nominated for Oscars. Unfortunately they are both too good, too perfect, too controlled and obsessed with their own images for anyone to bother congratulating them.
“Brangelina” are the masters of self promotion, King and Queen of the press, the über-über couple of Hollywood, and by and by there is no other way to describe the super family than as being exactly that: über. Nothing about them seems quite real.
If you look a little closer, Angelina is nothing but a self-involved, career-obsessed actress. For years she has sold herself in the media as a defiant woman sporting a body scrawled with tattoos. She has been outspoken about her sex-toy collection and claimed she drank the blood of her lover. But that is no longer seasonable. These days she’s publicly sharing her dreams of becoming a Grandma. The sex vixen has mutated into a super mom. Presumably this was why she accepted her favourite role, that of a mother, in her latest release, ‘Changeling’.
Brad Pitt has ostensibly managed to domesticate her, the big hunk. But he has also appeared a little stressed recently between the latest new-arrival, the latest film and the latest trip to the latest refugee camp. So who is under whose thumb there? Even in his Oscar-nominated role as Benjamin Button he was looking a little tired.
In reality Angelina is the Imelda Marcos of family planning. One is sitting on top of an ever growing pile of shoes while the other is accumulating children. The main thing is that you look good and you have options.
The children are paraded through the world’s airports with the same pride others reserve for their Manolo Blahniks. And just like in the world of fashion there are various styles to choose from; Cambodian, Namibian, Vietnamese? and three of their own designs. But that’s not enough. Jolie-Pitt puts a two-ton weight on the shoulders of every exhausted parent who ever had the bad luck of having to bring their children up in the real world. You aren’t perfectly styled two hours after giving birth? Fail. Angelina did it and so can you.
However, what happens when the 18 hushed-up nannies can’t control the chic young accessories was on show at a posh London hotel recently when the children ran amok like anyone else’s kids would.
You can’t even take their meek complaints about being followed by paparazzi seriously anymore. Even when there is no photographer present, Brad grabs the camera and takes a couple of happy-snaps of Angelina breast feeding for a U.S. fashion magazine. Are there any photos like that of Johnny Depp’s children? Or of Gwyneth Paltrow’s? No. But they both still make films.
The most unbearable thing that “Bradgie” stand to lose is their good-samaritan image. That’s why - when they’ve had enough of their holy family – they’re always jet setting off to Afghanistan, Kashmir or New Orleans to ease the world’s suffering. Cynics have theorized that this generous side didn’t surface until their public image was threatened, with Angelina having stolen Brad from his then-wife Jennifer Aniston.
Brad Pitt Angelina Jolie Academy Awards Oscars Brangelina Changeling The Curious Case of Benjamin Button Neither Brad nor Angelina takes any risks when accepting parts either in the real world or in their film projects. If this year’s Academy Awards ceremony sees the fairytale couple finally receive their crowns, then Hollywood will have the rulers that it deserves. Let’s just hope it doesn’t become a dynasty.
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