Author:
Jenni
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Date Posted: 07/24/06 2:48pm
My bestfriend's blog:
http://silentnomoredetroit.blogspot.com/
By aborting, not only will you be destroying your child, and a part of yourself... but your boyfriend will at some point be over come with the realization that he pressured you to abort your child.
And I guarentee that you WILL feel a numbing horrible emptiness take over you the moment your child is sucked from your womb... my best friend tells me that is what she felt both times she aborted.(you may feel relief, but it will only last so long!!!) By having an abortion, you also put yourself at risk of having another... what happens if you get pregnant two months later? Will Dom be any more ready to have a child???? You can say it won't happen, but no birthcontrol is 100% affective! Chances are you WILL become pregnant with in the year after your abortion, because you will desperately hope that if you get pregnant again, it will get rid of the emptiness... you will finally have your baby back (SOOOOO Many women do this!), only it doesn't work that way.
Think about the other kids you may have someday. What will they think when they find out that their older bro or sis didn't make it??? That they are missing a sibling? God doesn't make mistakes! You may think they will never find out, but kids have a way of figuring things out. The will notice how you get sad and upset every year during the month of July (even more so the day you had your abortion), they will notice how you cry every year in March (when the baby would've been due???), they will notice that you and their father (if you do end up staying together with him) are constantly fighting about something and blaming each other for something they know is serious, they may even hear you cry to him in anger "After what I did for you!!!!!!!", they may notice you cringe everytime the vacumn cleaner gets turned on (because it sounds VERY similar to the suction machine), that you are uncomfortable around pregnant women and newborns, and the list goes on and on....
There was a friend of the family who's husband accidentally backed over and killed his two year old with the family van. The family was overcome with grief, the father could not forgive himself... and it was an accident! The reason so many people suffer so badly after an abortion is because they made the decision to purposely have their child killed and to pay someone to do it! It wasn't an accident.
You two may (one of 20 women become sterile after abortion)have children later in life, however, no other child will ever be able to replace this child. No child will ever have the same eyes, nose, temperment, dreams, goals, laugh, cry. Each person is unique, each has his or her own DNA.
Your boy may be scared now, but once he sees his child... It will be a different story!!!
I, myself, was in your shoes, 6yrs ago. I was pregnant at 19. The thought of abortion went through my head. At one point I was willing to abort my daughter to save my life, my boyfriend's life... but now, I will die before anyone tries to hurt her. And if any man, no matter how much I loved him, asked me to kill my child because he isn't ready to be a father... I'd tell him to get a #$#@$$#%ing life! Because the truth of it is... if he REALLY loved me, he wouldn't ask me to kill my child. If he really loved me, he'd love OUR child.
Think of it in terms as, your child is currently 2yrs old. Would you put a bullet through her head because your boy doesn't want to be a dad? There is no difference between your child now and when she's two... they are still the same person. You child will grow up to be 2yrs. The only difference is that it's legal to kill a child while they are in the womb, and it's not legal to kill a 2yr old. Some choices, though they be legal, are not right. (for example slavery.)
And my daughter, Liberty, is the LOVE OF MY LIFE!
And you know what, YOU are so much stronger than you think you are!!!!
I have a good friend who had two kids out of wedlock. Both times he was told by all his friends and family to ask his girlfriend to abort. (He actually talked her out of it both times) And now, his kids are 7 and 10. And when his family, hugs and kisses his kids, he sometimes says.... "Hey, remember when you pressured me to have them aborted??? Hey mom and dad, aren't you glad I talked Tammy out of it?"
I guarentee your friend (who had an abortion and it didn't affect her) has been affected! Every woman is. There is a thing called pride and denial. Her abortion WILL hit her like a ton of bricks the moment she gives birth to a "wanted" child that she allowed to live. Many women live for YEARS in denial... their abortions ALWAYS come back to haunt them... ALWAYS at some time or another! My best friend has had two, they almost destroyed her.
I'm sorry if I sound harsh.... I only write this because I care. Because my bestfriend has said many times over and over again... "If only someone wouldn't stopped me! If only someone would've told me not to..." (She only had one friend telling her abortion wasn't a good choice and it was only because that girl had been forced to have an abortion by her parents. And yes, she did have a friend (who had had an abortion) telling her it was no big deal... ten years later, that girl isn't doing so hot herself!)
If you keep your child, I promise you that your boyfriend will one day THANK YOU... and he WILL love his child. You will also spare him the guilt of having his child's blood on his hands. (his own flesh and blood) I know this from experience!
There was once a day when men died while protecting their women and child, but now children die to protect their father's lifestyles. Having the child will in no way shape or form kill Dom.
You will NEVER EVER EVER EVER regret allowing your child to live!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I promise you! With abortion there is no going back... if anything, why not look into adoption. adoption.com There are open adoptions now that you can still be a part of your child's life, you pick the family, you build a relationship with. You can still see them grow, you can still watch them graduate, you can still be a part of their wedding, you can still meet your grandkids....
You will still be giving your child a chance!
But I highly doubt Dom will want to do this, because once he sees his child, he will not want to part with her!
Peace and love,
Jenni 26, single mom, homeowner since 22, college grad
Liberty almost 6, My mini-me, and my sunshine after the rain
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