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Subject: Re: UPDATE

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Date Posted: 05/25/10 12:15pm
In reply to: Courtney 's message, "UPDATE" on 05/23/10 10:00am


It can be very hard to face the fact that the guy doesn't always feel the same way about a pregnancy as the woman does. With women, we FEEL something deep inside us - emotionallty, intuitively, instinctively - that makes us be VERY protective of our young one growing inside us. We KNOW it's our baby. But the guy doesn't have the benefit of that physical, immediate perception. He's able to make it an abstract thing. "It"'s not an abstract concept. He or she is very REAL and is our offspring. True they're at a very early stage of their lives, but they are most definitely there...and the mother knows it. That's why so often on this board we hear from women who really don't want to have an abortion. They simply want their boyfriend to support them in their pregnancy. But, their boyfriends are emotionally absent. They basically desert the women when they need them the most - and they desert them even by sometimes saying "it's your choice". The woman, feeling no support for the pregnancy, succumbs to what appears to be the "easy" way out at the time. But, since they didn't really want to have an abortion, they now have to deal with the life-long reality of having aborted their child against what they knew they really wanted in their hearts. There is emotional pain and grief for a loss that can never be recovered. It's so tragic.

True, it doesn't appear that your boyfriend is ready to step up to the plate and be a father. But, that doesn't mean you're not ready to be a mother. You already are, and I hear it in your concern for your baby in your posts...

Be strong and know that we're all here for you.


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