VoyForums
[ Show ]
Support VoyForums
[ Shrink ]
VoyForums Announcement: Programming and providing support for this service has been a labor of love since 1997. We are one of the few services online who values our users' privacy, and have never sold your information. We have even fought hard to defend your privacy in legal cases; however, we've done it with almost no financial support -- paying out of pocket to continue providing the service. Due to the issues imposed on us by advertisers, we also stopped hosting most ads on the forums many years ago. We hope you appreciate our efforts.

Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your contribution is not tax-deductible.) PayPal Acct: Feedback:

Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):

Wed, Apr 22 2026, 14:58:02 [ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, 2, [3] ]

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Date Posted: Mon, Jun 19 2000, 22:00:23
Author: steve
Subject: Contraceptive Problems

Contraceptive Problems
--------------------
Dear Dr. Dover:

I wish to apply for an operation to make me sterile.

My reasons are numerous. After being married for seven years
and having had 7 children, I have come to the conclusion that
contraceptives are useless.

After getting married I was advised to use the rhythm
method. Despite trying the Tango and the Samba, my wife fell
pregnant and I ruptured myself doing the Cha-cha. Apart from
that, where do you find a band when you get the urge at two
o'clock in the morning?

A doctor suggested the safe period. At the time, we were
living with the in-laws and we had to wait 3 weeks for the
safe period, when the house was empty. Needless to say this
didn't work, and the wife got pregnant.

A lady of several years' experience said if we made love
while breast feeding we would be all right. Well, I finished
up with clear skin, silky hair and was very healthy, but the
wife got pregnant yet again.

Another tale we heard was if the wife jumped up and down
after intercourse this would prevent pregnancy. She slipped a
disc but still got pregnant again.

I asked the chemist about the condoms and he demonstrated
them, so I bought a packet. My wife fell pregnant again,
which did not surprise me as I never did believe how
stretching one of those things over your thumb could prevent
babies.

We tried the coil next but that didn't work. It had a
left-hand screw and my wife is definitely a right-hand
screw.

The Dutch cap was next and seemed to be our answer, but my
wife got severe headaches when the only size available was
too tight across the forehead.

Eventually we tried the Pill, but it kept dropping out, so
she tried it between her knees and I couldn't get anywhere
near her.

You must appreciate my problems. If I can't have the
operation I will have to resort to oral sex, and I can't
believe that talking about it is any substitute for the real
thing.

Yours sincerely,

Bubba Brickhead

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[ Contact Forum Admin ]

Forum timezone: GMT+0
VF Version: 3.00b, ConfDB:
Before posting please read our privacy policy.
VoyForums(tm) is a Free Service from Voyager Info-Systems.
Copyright © 1998-2019 Voyager Info-Systems. All Rights Reserved.