| Subject: Dreams at Sunset |
Author:
Cellius
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Date Posted: 15:18:40 07/24/02 Wed
The setting sun sank behind the mountains around Carenina, it burned an orange-red and seemed to bathe everything as far as the eye could see in a golden glow. Cellius drumed his fingers on the arm of his large chair, stuffed with goose feathers and covered in the skins of many exotic creatures that had been slain for food for his people. His black, curly beard served as the only cover for his bare chest, for his robe was left open. Men in Carenina often went without shirts. His emerald green eyes glitered with many distant thoughts as the cooler air that comes at dusk blew across the city. It was at this time mothers called their children inside, and wrapped babies in their blankets and put them to bed. It was also at this time that one could find Sahrien and the King talking about the events of the day, perhaps while sharing a bowl of fruit or a cup of plum wine.
Cellius missed his children. Every day they were away he mourned their absence. They were all he had left, after Cassidra's passing.
Cassindra, the very thought of the name made his heart sing with joy and cry with pain all at once. Cassidra was his wife, and the mother of his children. He longed once again for her presence. She could calm the most violent of storms with only her loving touch. If only he had known her before he had met Faeirex, perhaps she could've quieted her rage. But he had known Faeirex long before he knew Cassindra, long before he had children of his own. Faeirex was the nearest he had been to having a daughter of his own before he married Cassindra.
But she was not a daughter. She hadn't come near to being one, though she had been in his heart, she still was. She wasn't a daughter, though. Cellius realised this one afternoon when he was watching Cassidra nurse Derrion, his curly black hair and dark olive skin contrasting against the fair skin and blonde hair of his wife. Her deep brown eyes were filled with the utter joy and love that comes from having children. She looked down at her son and smiled as she stroked his brown cheek. Cellius marvled at how his two sons could look so little like their mother, and so much like him. He remembered watching them grow, their curly black hair soon mirroring his own, and Arracus's green eyes changing from those of a child to those of a man. Derrion had brown eyes, like his mother, yet they had the shape and essence of Cellius's. What a shock it was when Laeriel and Sahrien were born, he mused one night while holding Laeriel. She was such a fussy baby, it was near impossible to put her to sleep. Cassidra watched them from around the corner, smiling to herself at the contrast between the two in looks, but how very much alike they were. Cellius smiled as Laeriel slowly closed her brown eyes, her sandy blonde hair was long for a baby, and her skin was as fair as her mother's. She was such a mirrior image of her mother, that Cassidra cut her hair when Laeriel was older so as not to confuse them.
She was even beautiful with her hair cut short, Cellius thought one evening as caught sight of his wife and her daughter, Laeriel, walking home after a long day of gathering berries. Cassindra's hair danced around her ears and brushed her chin as the cool breeze that only blew at dusk gave relief to the humidity that was earlier in the day. He smiled, Laeriel may look as her mother, but she was twin to him in personality. The fire that burned in him also burned in Laeriel. That was why he and Cassidra were so perfect for eachother, she calmed his burning soul.
What would he ever do without her? He thought to himself on that rainy day they buried the only love he'd ever known. His heart died the day those love-filled brown eyes closed forever, never to see the sun again. He watched as dirt slowly filled the deep hole she lay in, and a part of himself lay with her, never to be returned to him again. But even as the last shovel full of dirt was thrown onto the grave, a small part of him was happy, happy to have the privledge to have loved someone so perfect and pure. How terrible it would be to never love at all. And as his daughter's sobs reached his ears and forever scared his soul, he remembered the day he had told someone they could never love.
He always wondered why he did it. Why tell someone they can never love? How could that possibly help someone? He thought one day, long after his wife had died and the wounds her death left where as healed as they would ever be. Never in his life would he regret anything more than telling that scared young girl that she could never have the greatest joy anyone could ask for. He knew that day, he had ruined what chance she had at life forever.
It was dark now, the sun had set long ago. Cellius had been too deep in thought to notice. The cold of the night wrapped itself around him, though, and pulled him from his thoughts. He closed his robe, surprised at how cold this night was, cold and dark. A feeling then crept up inside him, a sinking feeling that his words to that elf long ago had done more damage than any words anywhere could ever do. He knew it would happen, she would eventually fall in love, and the guilt that love brought would kill her. It would bring guilt because she had loved before, and will love again, and her love would kill as it always did. Cellius walked to his window, and looked into the darkened sky. Please, Faeirex, come home. Come home before it's too late, or I shall never see you again. He knew there were forces bringing each of them out of this world; He would die before this was over, and so would she. Although he knew faeries posessed not the power of telepathy, he still hoped his words would reach her. A little part of him thought they did, or hoped they did, prayed they did. Every part of him wished for his words to reach that tortured soul that had been cheated out of happiness by the cruelness of fate. Or else it would truly be too late.
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