VoyForums
[ Show ]
Support VoyForums
[ Shrink ]
VoyForums Announcement: Programming and providing support for this service has been a labor of love since 1997. We are one of the few services online who values our users' privacy, and have never sold your information. We have even fought hard to defend your privacy in legal cases; however, we've done it with almost no financial support -- paying out of pocket to continue providing the service. Due to the issues imposed on us by advertisers, we also stopped hosting most ads on the forums many years ago. We hope you appreciate our efforts.

Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your contribution is not tax-deductible.) PayPal Acct: Feedback:

Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):

[ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, [2], 3 ]

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Date Posted: August 11, 03:11:pm GMT-5
Author: Seems
Subject: After years of drinking down at the local pub, I conclude...

... nowt =) but these bartenders have something to say!

Seven bartenders were asked if they could identify personality on what drinks were chosen. Though interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts. The results:

IF WOMEN DRINK:

Drink: Beer.
Personality: Casual, low maintenance; down to earth.
Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool.

Drink: Blender drinks with umbrella.
Personality: Flaky, annoying, dizzy, and a pain in the ass.
Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy.

Drink: Mixed drinks - no umbrellas
Personality: Mature, has picky taste; knows what she wants.
Approach: If she wants you, she'll send YOU a drink.

Drink: Wine (bottled not 4 litre cask)
Personality: Conservative and classy, sophisticated.
Approach: Try and weave Paris and clothing into the conversation.

Drink: Bacardi Breezer, Smirnoff ice, Vodka mule, etc
Personality: Easy; thinks she is trendy and sophisticated actually has absolutely no clue.
Approach: Make her feel smarter than she is...and you're in.

Drink: Baileys.
Personality: Annoying voice, bit of a tart.
Approach: Stand close and mention the alley next to the pub.

Drink: Shots (Vodka, Aftershock etc.).
Personality: Hanging with male pals or looking to get drunk...and naked.
Approach: Easiest hit in the pub. Nothing to do but wait.

IF MEN DRINK - As always, very simple and clear cut.

Cider: He's probably under-aged and wants to get laid.

Cheap Domestic Beer: He's poor / student and wants to get laid.

Premium Local Beer: He likes good beer and wants to get laid.

Bitter: He's old, he likes good beer and wants to get laid.

Imported Beer: He likes expensive beer and wants to get laid

Guinness: The man is handsome, witty, has a great sense of style, is charasmatic and everybody wants to have sex with him

Wine: He's hoping that the wine thing will give him a sophisticated image and help him get laid.

Vodka or Brandy: Extremely horny hound, would shag
a warm scarf. Desperate to get laid.

Port: Thinks he's sophisticated, secretly likes men
and wants to get laid.

Whisky: He doesn't give two shits about anything and will hit anyone who will get in his way of getting laid.

Jack Daniels: Not as masculine as the whisky drinker, knows all about feminine activities (knitting, crochet etc.) to weasel himself into getting laid.

Tequila: Likes fighting almost as much as getting laid.

Bacardi Breezer,Smirnoff ice, Vodka mule, etc: He's gay(Blatantly).

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

Post a message:
This forum requires an account to post.
[ Create Account ]
[ Login ]
[ Contact Forum Admin ]

Forum timezone: GMT-5
VF Version: 3.00b, ConfDB:
Before posting please read our privacy policy.
VoyForums(tm) is a Free Service from Voyager Info-Systems.
Copyright © 1998-2019 Voyager Info-Systems. All Rights Reserved.