Deep Thoughts� (VanReardon, Connor, MJ, Fury, OutLaw, Winston, Pussy Galore, Vixxxen, Shadow, Runner, & Thomas) Featuring: Trisha VanReardon -- Gladiator Wrestling Alliance

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Date Posted: 05:36:12 10/10/00 Tue
Author: Stacey Lynn Jordan
Subject: Deep Thoughts� (VanReardon, Connor, MJ, Fury, OutLaw, Winston, Pussy Galore, Vixxxen, Shadow, Runner, & Thomas) Featuring: Trisha VanReardon

�Inspiration��

�We all need some from time to time� Stacey Jordan was no different. She had taken no solace in being a member of The GWA, and at times she seemed not to care that she was one at all. When she had her battles with Skylar Thomas she felt that she was a part of something bigger and more important. That moment had come and gone. The competitive fires no longer burned� but there was at least something else there now. A seed of anger sitting there� growing� and soon it would be time for the harvest��

10:00 PM� 8 October, 2000
Palm Springs, California

Stacey sat on her bed� all alone. No surprise really, she had gotten use to being alone while everyone else was out enjoying the nightlife. Her last outing had been with Kenny Rock almost eight months ago. From time to time she wondered if she could even recall what it was like to have someone special to spend time with. Everyone seemed to have someone now a days. Trace had Stephanie� MJ had Steven� OutLaw had Rachel� and Shadow� well� Shadow had Shadow to keep himself company. She doubted that anyone could possibly like him as much as he liked himself. Stacey lay back on her pillow and closed her eyes. She winced slightly at the tremendous pain in her injured knee. Pussy Galore and Vixxxen had done a number on her at Insurrection. They knew the right place to hit her and they zeroed in on it with precision. Stacey could still recall the sound as Pussy whacked away at her with the bell hammer. The heavy brace she wore on her knee had deflected the most vicious blows, but a majority of the shots had found the titanium of artificial kneecap that replaced her own shattered knee. The pain had been excruciating� even more painful than the night it was shattered in The Amazon Title match against Felicia Banks. Stacey gritted her teeth as she grabbed the pain pills the doctor had given her and twisted off the cap. Stacey paused as she looked at the blue and white pills� drugs� more drugs� painkillers had ruined her life before. An addiction that she hadn�t asked for or even started on her own. Even as she stared at the pills she could her the names and accusations� �Crack Whore� �Druggie� Stacey put the cap back on the bottle and tossed them into the wastebasket. She had no desire to return to that era of her life� no matter how much the doctor�s insisted she needed them. Pain was a part of living� and for some� it was the only thing that made them feel alive. Soon� Pussy Galore and Vixxxen were going to feel more alive than they ever have in there pathetic lives�

6:07 AM� 8 October, 2000
Palm Springs, California

Stacey�s eyes flicked open and she sat up with a start� another night of restless sleep� another night of tormented dreams. They seemed to be her only reliable companion as of late. She had gotten use to reliving the same dreams night after night�

The feelings of despair she had felt after she had sacrificed her principles to get revenge for Mei Himagaji� then later the feeling of betrayal as she learned that Mei had not died at all� but used the ploy to regain her lost title�

The feelings of bitterness she felt after she was drugged and sexually assaulted by a nefarious doctor who was suppose to treat the knee she that had been damaged by Deanna Raventhorne. With the bitterness came the shame of an addiction to the painkillers that he had given her. Everything had changed then� a loss of innocence�

The feelings of intense loneliness as everyone seemed to desert her when she needed them most� Kris Craven merely disappeared, Kenny Rock faked his death� then later decided that other women were more appealing to him, the so-called fans loved to hate her� no matter how good she was...

Her life felt hallowed and empty� more wasted than anything. All these things had been heaped upon her in the brief span of her adult life. Many people suffered more tragically� but none felt as profoundly and utterly lost by it. Stacey had become a new person� someone with less regrets who acted on impulse. Cat had made an impression on her� someone she never believed she�d ever side with. Cat had given her a new lease on life� a chance to be known as something other than the crusading female who pumped her fists for the roar of the crowd and stood up for those who couldn�t do so on their own. Stacey had reinvented herself into what she had most despised� she cared for nothing and took what she wanted� but none of it was truly her. Sure� she had done things that labeled her as a heel. She had jammed Mitchell Bleek into the canvas to get Trace VanReardon his first win. She had struck Doomsday from behind and even managed to �Screwdrive� the 300+ pound man to gain another victory for Trace. At the behest of Cat� Stacey had jammed Lexus O�Bannon�s skull into the steel steps� putting her into the hospital for weeks� hell, for all she knew Lexus was still there. All these things she had done without the slightest remorse� but in the end� her true nature revealed itself again to her disgust. Skylar Thomas had opened the door that she had thought to be closed for good. Skylar had assaulted a female GWA employee� the girlfriend of �Amazing� Johnny DuWright. Powerbombed her from a ladder, down through a table. Skylar justified it as her attacking him and he merely defending himself. And even though she hardly considered herself or womankind in general as �The weaker sex� the woman had been about as threatening to him as a plastic ping-pong ball. The war with Thomas was on and the two took turns torturing each other on a nightly basis. Often they left in the backs of ambulances and though she�d deny it� she looked forward to being attacked as much as she did to going on the offensive herself. In some sad but sick and twisted way� she thought of battles with Thomas as a relationship of sorts. And though she professed that the thought of him touching her made her violently ill� it held a sort of allure to it. Stacey and Skylar were to meet at The PPV� one of the conditions of her vacating her title� but the match had not been signed by the new GWA management. Instead of closure� she got lame Tampax jokes from Chad Runner. Time drifted past and Stacey pushed the incident behind her� but what she couldn�t get behind her were the thoughts that she had more to resolve with Skylar Thomas� whether it was in or outside of the ring. She had been cheated out of her chance and now that ate at her more than anything else could or would� maybe even more than her vendetta against Pussy Galore and Vixxxen ever could�

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