Re: How long before trust is built? -- METH HELP FOR FAMILIES

[ Show ]

Support VoyForums

[ Shrink ]

VoyForums Announcement: Programming and providing support for this service has been a labor of love since 1997. We are one of the few services online who values our users' privacy, and have never sold your information. We have even fought hard to defend your privacy in legal cases; however, we've done it with almost no financial support -- paying out of pocket to continue providing the service. Due to the issues imposed on us by advertisers, we also stopped hosting most ads on the forums many years ago. We hope you appreciate our efforts.

Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your contribution is not tax-deductible.) PayPal Acct: Feedback:

Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):

[ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, 2, 3, [4], 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 ]

Subject: Re: How long before trust is built?

Author:
Hulalea

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Date Posted: 18:26:35 08/20/06 Sun
In reply to: Shelly 's message, "How long before trust is built?" on 14:01:28 08/20/06 Sun

Shelly,
With him just being out of rehab, chances are he'll be clean. I think the best gauge you can have is your own instinct. It is something we have to rely on with prayer and guidance. It's what I had to use with my ex. I would not let him see our kids initially because I was afraid that the crap that comes out of his mouth (denial, lies and manipulation) would continue to hurt so I had to check things out. When they are humble, they will do anything to see their kids and they can really miss and love them. They should never demand or manipulate anything otherwise you can tell that they have not been humbled enough and therefore not healthy enough to be exposed to the kids. My ex really showed humility to us after his rehab (18 months) and we all went through some counseling. Everyone had some healing to do and he had to be patient.
We told my ex that whether he likes it or not, we could not trust him and that it would take a while for us to trust him yet by his forcing us to trust him, he would mess things up more so he had to be patient. It truly took us over a year to really trust him yet we still have our doubts. He, however understands that and is aware that he has put us through so much and this is the consequence.
You do not have to trust in their time. I would watch for changes and if there aren't any, it's not your fault.
I will pray for you.
God Be with you,
Hulalea

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
Re: How long before trust is built?	Debbie S	18:31:40 08/20/06 Sun