| Subject: Re: would like your input (hulalea) |
Author:
neverending
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Date Posted: 21:48:04 04/04/06 Tue
In reply to:
Hulalea
's message, "Re: would like your input" on 15:09:28 04/04/06 Tue
Hulalea, you said: How can you have an order against him which obviously has a date set yet set today as the day he is to be out. Which day is it? If you don't define AND respect your own boundaries, why should he? You can do it - you're helping him more than you know by doing it. It may not be the nicest thing to do but it is the kindest thing you can do.
Let me better explain. Damn near this time last year, went thru same thing , re: his addiction; I got w/a lawyer, filed divorce, got an ex parte hearing, which got an order to kick him out, supervised visits, etc.
He actually made a come around. Did NA, sponsor, he had 6 months clean, we started counseling and he moved back in August of this year. I told my atty was attempting reconcile, but agreed w/her to leave everything as is, just not to schedule a return hearing. That my divorce filing would stay 'live' for 5 years and the kick out /supervised visits order for 2. (I'm in california, just FYI)
So anyhow, less than a month after he moved back in... relapse. Presumably it was a one time thing. By november 2005 I knew he was back on it somewhat regularly. From that point on , everything just consistently got worse; trying to quit, not quitting, the lying, the this, the that. and I finally said to him a week ago "get out. 1 week." and that brings me to now.
Thank you both, Hulalea and Doug for your replies. I've been reading this site for over 3 years, and input from the 2 of you is much appreciated and respected by me. Thank you.
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