VoyForums
[ Show ]
Support VoyForums
[ Shrink ]
VoyForums Announcement: Programming and providing support for this service has been a labor of love since 1997. We are one of the few services online who values our users' privacy, and have never sold your information. We have even fought hard to defend your privacy in legal cases; however, we've done it with almost no financial support -- paying out of pocket to continue providing the service. Due to the issues imposed on us by advertisers, we also stopped hosting most ads on the forums many years ago. We hope you appreciate our efforts.

Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your contribution is not tax-deductible.) PayPal Acct: Feedback:

Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):

Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 12345678[9]10 ]
Subject: I didn't let him step over my boundaries.....


Author:
Heather
[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]
Date Posted: 13:16:57 03/18/06 Sat

So check this out. I get a call this morning from Bernie. Remember I changed my phone number? How did they get my number? Anyways...Spencer asked him to call and ask if he can come by and drop off some money for me and some stuff he bought for the boys. I said no, but that I am glad he is trying to be responsible and asked that for now, if he can just send a check and box up the things and send them through the mail. I can't just let him come over cause he has money to give or gifts to give. I am sure he feels good about being able to help and being able to start helping out but one time is not going to change everything. He will have to be real consistent about helping and then talk about seeing his son at a later time. He has not changed really and I know that. It's only been a short while and he still has contact with his drug friends. He lost his old cell phone and got a new one. His chance to lose touch with these people and guess what? He calls them and gives them his new cell number. I know he is still using just hiding it from Bernie. Sooner or later he will get found out again and that is not my problem nor do I want it to be. I think now I would know the difference in him if he really had his mind set on quitting. He hasn't so far and it is now so very obvious the way people change when they really want to. I have seen now 3 of my cousins get off of meth and they changed dramatically pretty much quick because they had their mind set on getting off the drugs and being with their loved ones. I have learned so much by going through this terrible ordeal and I will not go down again. I know that it's hard to get off but Spencer is making it look impossible. But I also know he is just manipulating everyone around him still. Trying to look like he is living a clean life but not really living a clean life. He doesn't fool me and that's why he doesn't make the phone calls. He think I will say yes to Bernie, but in all reality I am not saying anything to Bernie, I am saying No to Spencer. He doesn't have me fooled. When he is ready to really clean up his life it will be different than this. I don't believe he will put people through hell and be clean. I hear my cousins and anyone who I have known that got clean, talk about how great it is to be clean and they change. They really change everything about themselves and their life. I don't see that with Spencer. All I see is manipualtion. I did speak to him a couple of weeks ago and I asked him how long he has been clean and he asked "Why?" Ok nevermind. I already know that he isn't clean at all . Cause if I am not mistaken, if you are really clean and proud that you are, won't you be proud to say you are?

Ok so tell me what you think. I am proud of myself. But I also have this tug at my heart cause I love that dumb guy still. I won't let this be a downfall, but I do still hope he will just see the freakin light. He needs to really want this. Please pray for him that God will put it in his heart to really want to be clean and give him the mind-set to do it for good.

Thanks,
Heather

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:
Subject Author Date
Re: I didn't let him step over my boundaries.....LS13:49:37 03/18/06 Sat
Re: I didn't let him step over my boundaries.....SUSAN F14:22:15 03/18/06 Sat
Re: I didn't let him step over my boundaries.....kim09:21:55 03/19/06 Sun
Re: I didn't let him step over my boundaries.....Melinda09:41:52 03/26/06 Sun


[ Contact Forum Admin ]


Forum timezone: GMT-8
VF Version: 3.00b, ConfDB:
Before posting please read our privacy policy.
VoyForums(tm) is a Free Service from Voyager Info-Systems.
Copyright © 1998-2019 Voyager Info-Systems. All Rights Reserved.