| Subject: Episode 2 (Inside) |
Author:
Neela & Bronte
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Date Posted: 21:31:12 03/22/09 Sun
Author Host/IP: adsl-75-38-78-70.dsl.bkfd14.sbcglobal.net/75.38.78.70
In reply to:
Neela
's message, "A New Neela and Bronte Parody" on 11:34:05 12/31/08 Wed
The Neela and Bronte Parody: Episode 2
“Whose Act is it Anyway?”
*Lights flash and a catchy guitar tune blares on a stage. Neela, Bronte, the Helpers, and four other characters are on the stage as well.*
Neela: Welcome to “Whose Act is it Anyway?”, the wonderful, fantastic, amazing… uh… show. We are hosting the first ever showing of it in this parody for your convenience.
Bronte: That’s right. Today we have two different categories participating separately. *Looks around expectantly.* Wait for it… It’s Squirrels and Mice! *He pushes a button on a bright orange remote and recorded applause sounds.*
Dibbun Audience: *cricket*
Neela: Uh… well, since the audience has lost their interest, we will now dismiss the Helpers… They won’t be needed right now… *The Helpers go offstage.* And let's introduce the Contestants!
Dibbun Audience: *blinkblink*
Bronte: Hmm… Well, the two squirrels are Hammy from “Over the Hedge” and Triss from… Er, Triss. The
mice are Abbess Germaine from Mossflower and Reepicheep from “Prince Caspian”. Isn’t it great to have them all here with us?
Dibbun Audience & the offstage Helpers: *All of them yawn loudly and a few let out noisy snores.*
Neela: Gee, thanks, Helpers. I knew I could count on you for your support.
Reepicheep: *taps Bronte on shoulder*
Bronte: What?!
Reepicheep: I do hate to point out the obvious, but your audience seems to be bored.
Neela: YA’ THINK?!! *Everyone jumps.*
Triss: *stepping in* There’s no need to lose your temper, missie. Think of a way to fix the problem.
Abbess Germaine: Yes. Do something to bring back their interest.
Bronte: But what would interest them?
*All of them mull this over, and then they all look at Hammy in unison.*
Hammy: *twirling around and humming “The Candyman Can” song out-of-tune* La-la La-la-la…
Neela: I vote that Hammy is first to act.
Bronte: I second that vote.
Abbess Germaine: Definitely.
Triss: Absolutely.
Reepicheep: Is he a Telmarine squirrel?
Neela, Bronte, Triss, and Abbess Germaine: NO!
Reepicheep: Then he should go first.
Bronte: Well, everyone agrees, so… *He pulls out a small blue pail and takes out a slip of paper from it.* Okay… Hammy?
Hammy: *stops twirling and tackles Bronte, giving him a tight hug* Are you a friend? Hammy loves friends! And cookies… And Red Ox…
Bronte: Gerroff! *Neela pulls off Hammy, who immediately starts hopping up and down in place.* Yes, Hammy. I’m a friend, but… I need you to do something for me first.
Hammy: Like what? Walk on water? Play with stinging lights? Act like a rabid squirrel? Are cookies involved?
Bronte: Eh… no. Well, you’ll get a cookie afterwards, but I need you to act out something.
Hammy: Oooh! Cookies! I get to act? Like charades? I love charades! Pick me! Me! Me! Me!
Bronte: Whatever. Anyway, your act is: *imitates booming voice* “Pretend you are Dorothy from the “Wizard of Oz” and sing ‘Somewhere Over the Rainbow’!”
*Somewhere in the world, the Author of this parody ducks.*
Author: Don’t kill me for using that, please!
*Meanwhile, back at the parody.*
Hammy: Sure! But first… *runs offstage, grabs a blue and white checked sheet, and then runs back onstage*
Neela: Before you or anyone else begins, Hammy, you need to know how this works. You will be graded on your acting skills by the Helpers, Bronte, and me on a score of 1-5, 1 being the lowest score and 5 being the highest score. Speaking of Helpers… *whistles the guitar tune and the Helpers dash back onstage*
Neela: Watch this performance carefully, Helpers. You make up 3/5ths of the scoring.
Bronte: *turning to Hammy* You may begin.
Hammy: *fashions the sheet into a toga-like dress and commences singing horribly off-key* So-ome WHERE… Over the HAMBOW!
Dibbun Audience: *They wake up only to cover their ears, although a few laugh.*
Hammy: Wiiittthhh Aaaa PIIEEE! There’s a lay-and that I misplaced and BLEW UP… TWICE! ... In a lullaby… HAMDAY I’ll wish upon a car…
Neela: *uncovering her ears* That’s quite enough, Hammy. No more, please.
Hammy: Okey Dokey. Reward?
Bronte: *uncovering his ears as well* After the scoring. Helpers? What’s your grade?
Lissi Riversong: *winces* Um… Well… *holds up a number one* That was awful!
Hammy: Yay! I’m number one!
Songwind: Sorry Bud, but I have to agree with Lissi. *holds up a one* If you hadn’t been so loud, then it might have been funny.
Hammy: Two number ones? o.0
Skystar: *doubled over in laughter* Ha! You didn’t like it? Ha-That was the funniest thing I ever saw… and heard! HAHA *holds up a five*
Hammy: Fivey! Fivey-five-five-five!
*Neela and Bronte hold a hurried discussion, then hold up their own numbers.*
Neela: That was a funny performance, but I think my eardrums may be deaf forever. *holds up a four*
Bronte: Lose the toga look and it will be splendid. *holds up a four*
Neela: *works the math in her head* That means your average is 3. Great job, Hammy! *gives him a cookie*
Hammy: Cookie! Yay!
Neela: We’ll have Triss, Abbess Germaine, and Reepicheep act in the next episode. See you then!
-----------------------
Next: “Whose Act is it Anyway?” Part 2
Episode Poll:
Somewhere, over the…
a) Hambow
b) Rainbow
c) I dunno…
d) *whack*
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