Re: Say The Words - ch. 15 & 16 -- The Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman Fan Exchange

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Date Posted: 06:19:30 03/26/03 Wed
Author: dqfan
Subject: Re: Say The Words - ch. 15 & 16
In reply to: dqfan 's message, "Re: Say The Words - ch. 14" on 06:16:42 03/26/03 Wed

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

"If that's the boiler, it's been through enough tonight," Frank commented sarcastically, observing Peter attack the punching bag with fire in his eyes and a particularly ferocious left hook.

"Shouldn't you be heading home to Sophie," Frank wondered casually.

"No!" Peter growled, jabbing at the bag once again.

"Oh, I get it," Frank drawled, "Sophie is the bag�"

"No!" Peter hissed, striking the bag even more strenuously than before. "Of course not!" he exclaimed, as sweat poured from his scowling face and glistened on his naked chest.

"Okay, okay, take it easy," Frank advised, grabbing the bag before Peter could take another swing. "So, it's not Sophie�"

Still, somehow, Frank couldn't shake the feeling that it was. Maybe it was because Peter had denied the possibility a little too quickly or maybe it was because Frank knew how difficult an adjustment living together could be, especially for two people as independent as Peter and Sophie.

Lord knows, his own first months of marriage to MaryEllen had been one long period of trial and error, each of them trying to find their way, hoping they were doing something� anything�right. Now, making matters worse, poor Sophie was cooped up at home with a bad ankle�That couldn't be easy on either of them.

Nonetheless, Frank could see that Peter wasn't going to open up to him tonight, no matter what he said. When Peter was wound that tightly, all he could do was explode. Frank was just very grateful Peter's frustration was focused on the punching bag instead of the bottle.

"Frank�I appreciate it�but�" Peter gasped, his chest heaving from the force of his workout as he tried to catch his breath.

"You appreciate it, but you don't want to talk about it�" Frank finished Peter's sentence for him.

Peter nodded, taking a swig of his water bottle, the muscles in his arms still vibrating from those last few punches. "Not right now, Frank, okay?"

"Okay, but give the bag a break," Frank sighed as he released the bag, knowing it was useless to argue.

"Give yourself a break, too, Pete," he reminded him with a gentle pat on the back before leaving Peter alone to face his demons once again.

^^^^^^^^^^^

"So, what happened?" Ezra had followed Daisy from the couch to the bookcase and then back again, desperate for the details of her conversation with the strange old couple at Oakhaven.

"Happened?" Daisy asked innocently, enjoying the look on Ezra's face.

"Please�not you, too�" Ezra begged, knowing he'd have no choice but to turn to drugs if one more person today insisted on repeating his every word.

"They were very nice - and�" Daisy hesitated.

"And?" Ezra leaned closer, protecting their conspiracy.

"And�very weird�" Daisy admitted.

"I knew it!" Ezra's sense of vindication was palpable. "What did the cards say?" He could hardly wait.

"Well�it was a highly unusual reading�" Daisy began slowly. "I've never seen it happen before�"

"That bad, huh?" Ezra was positively salivating at the possibilities.

"What was it, Daise? You can tell me�The Devil? The Hangman? Death?"
Ezra recalled the most horrific cards Daisy had taught him, his tone growing more ominous with each one.

"The Lovers�" Daisy intoned seriously.

"The Lovers?" If this was the best Daisy could do, Ezra was sorely disappointed.

"What's so weird about that?" he asked in dismay. "I told you they couldn't keep their hands off each other�"

"Thrice�" Daisy whispered, looking over her shoulder warily.

"Thrice?" Ezra sounded confused.

"The same card, Ezra�" Daisy sighed, having little patience with novices in the occult sciences. "They each picked a card and then I picked one and each time it came up the same�"

"Ahh, The Lovers, Thrice�" Ezra nodded knowingly, though he was actually still quite lost. "And that portends what, exactly?"

"Well, I've been researching it all day," Daisy enthused, gesturing to the stack of reference books beside her.

"And�" Ezra was wound tighter than a yo-yo.

"There are several possibilities," Daisy began thoughtfully. "The first and most obvious being that when any card is drawn three times, the strength of that card is then magnified threefold."

"Meaning their love is three times stronger than your average everyday ordinary lovers?" Ezra quipped off-handedly.

"In layman's terms - yes," Daisy replied bluntly.

"But The Lovers is also the card of relationships," Daisy proceeded cautiously. "So it could be that each card signifies a separate relationship - their own and, perhaps, two others."

"Two others?" Ezra tried to follow Daisy's explanation. "You mean, two other couples?"

"Yes," Daisy continued, placing her hands atop the books for emphasis. "According to these books, we could be witnessing the Theory of Intersection�"

"The Theory of Intersection?" Ezra gulped nervously, suddenly realizing that now he was the one repeating Daisy's every word�

"The path of this one couple," she hypothesized, "with their extraordinary love, is about to intersect with that of two other couples, hence�"

"The Lovers Thrice�" Ezra repeated in awe, beginning to see the light.

"So the question becomes�" Ezra was sounding more and more like Sherlock Holmes. "Who are the other couples?"

"Well�possibly�us�" Daisy contemplated thoughtfully.

Ezra's eyes twinkled brightly, upon hearing Daisy refer to them as a "couple."

"Us?" he blushed, his voice rising in a decided lilt.

"Well, you have been spending a lot of time with them�" Daisy justified quickly, slightly embarrassed. "And now you've got me involved in this, too - whatever this is�It could be as simple as that."

Ezra thought of his recent decision to apply to college, to pursue his interest in medicine. He might never have done that if it hadn't been for the old woman. And he and Daisy had definitely been spending more time alone together because of their interest in the old couple. What if, ultimately, he and Daisy grew closer as a result? Wouldn't they, in some part, have the strange pair to thank for it? Twenty years from now, would he look back and realize it might all have been different if not for them? Suddenly, The Theory of Intersection was beginning to sound amazingly plausible to Ezra.

Unwilling to share yet with Daisy just exactly how accurate her suppositions might be, Ezra wondered aloud, "But then who's the other couple?"

Without thinking, Daisy said the first thing that popped into her head... "Peter and Sophie?"

"Why them?" Ezra asked surprised by her answer.

"Uh�I�don't know why�" Daisy seemed as surprised as Ezra. Why had she blurted out their names? Daisy's forehead crinkled as she thought it over.

"Peter and Sophie haven't even met them, Daise," Ezra couldn't see the connection at all.

"I don't know�" Daisy mumbled again, knowing she wasn't making any sense. "Something about his eyes�"

"Peter's eyes?" Uneasily, Ezra felt himself adrift in Daisy's stream of consciousness yet again.

"No, the old man's eyes," she clarified warily. Even Daisy realized she wasn't making much sense now. How could she explain this to Ezra when she couldn't even explain it to herself? It was just a feeling she'd had when she looked in the old man's mesmerizing blue eyes that day. There was this incredible combination of warmth and mischief - worldly-wise man and playful little boy - that she had only seen in one other person. "They reminded me of Peter's, I guess�" was the best she could offer.

"That isn't much to go on, Daise," Ezra sighed, somewhat discouraged. "Maybe we should keep an eye on them?"

Which ones?" Daisy wondered if Ezra meant Peter and Sophie or the old couple at Oakhaven.

"Both�" Ezra announced firmly, deciding the situation warranted thorough surveillance on all fronts.

Stirred by his call to action, Daisy chose to ignore the very likely possibility that Ezra might be using this situation solely to worm his way into her heart.

"So what if he is?" she asked herself, smiling inwardly. "At least he's creative�" she noted, sizing Ezra up and down critically.

"After all," Daisy reminded herself as she nodded intently, pledging Ezra her total cooperation, "Creativity is very attractive in a man�"

^^^^^^^^^^^^^

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Unable to summon the strength for even one more blow to the punching bag, Peter stumbled to his office for a long, hot shower.

Weakly, he emerged and grabbed a pair of gray sweatpants and a long-sleeved ivory thermal ribbed shirt that he'd left hanging on the bathroom door. Then, wearily, he collapsed onto the sofa. The workout may have successfully exhausted his body, but nothing could numb the pain in his heart. Nothing except maybe drugs or liquor - both of which were extraordinarily tempting at the moment, yet equally out of the question. Peter had gone that route before and he was determined never to travel it again, no matter what.

So, where did that leave him? Dejected, Peter rested his aching head in his hands, praying the pounding would subside. How could he go on like this? Keeping this secret from Sophie was eating him up alive. Worse than that, it was creating a chasm between them - wider than any canyon he'd ever hiked. This was supposed to be a fantastic time for them - planning their wedding, living together and loving each other completely, with nothing in their way. But now, he could barely look Sophie in the eye, could barely bring himself to touch her. It had to be written all over his face. He kept waiting for Sophie to say something but she never did. No, she trusted him. He was her rock�her touchstone.

Desperately, Peter tried to muffle the sound of Sophie's voice inside his head, as it kept repeating those two phrases - "You're my rock, Peter�" You're my touchstone�" - over and over again, with far more tenderness than he deserved.

Powerless, Peter felt an unexpected wave of nausea and reclined carefully on the couch, closing his eyes as he rested his head gingerly against the cushions�.

For the longest time, all Peter could hear was Sophie. Then, frantic to escape, he found himself running�hiking�climbing - anything to avoid the love in Sophie's voice. Suddenly lost in the woods, desperate and alone, there was nowhere to turn. Darkness surrounded him, yet still he kept moving, afraid to stop.

Gradually, Sophie's words began to recede and Peter caught a glimpse of a fire flickering up ahead. When he reached the clearing, a glowing campsite beckoned invitingly�

"Pull up a log, Son," Sully encouraged him.

"You're Sully�" Peter whispered incredulously, taking a good look at the man in front of him. The resemblance was uncanny.

"And you're Peter," Sully smiled, realizing Peter might need a few moments to adjust.

"C'mon," Sully repeated, placing his arm around Peter's shoulder, "let's sit down�"

^^^^^^^^^^

The coffee Sully poured was strong, offered in a tin metal cup, and Peter took it gratefully as he tried in vain to reconcile reality with what was happening right now.

Remembering the last time he'd had a vision like this, Peter thought out loud, "Michaela�"

"Is busy right now." Sully read his mind before Peter could even ask the question. "'Sides, she figured maybe you and me had more t'talk about this time."

"Why's that?" Peter wasn't sure exactly how much Sully knew of his present predicament.

"'Cause I know how hard it is t'keep a secret from the woman you love," Sully said softly, poking the fire with a stick and staring hauntingly into the flames.

"You know?" Peter lowered his defenses, relieved to have someone to confide in.

"'Bout her Pa comin' t'town?" Sully asked, without waiting for a reply. "Ya. And I know why you think you gotta keep it from her."

Sully paused for a moment, then added, "Michaela and her Ma had their share o' troubles. Don't remember 'em ever havin' a visit, without one of 'em mad about somethin'�" he recalled vividly.

"But the love was always there," Sully remembered softly.

"That's the whole point," Peter interrupted, agitated. "I have to make sure the love is there. Sophie deserves that."

"So you're doin' this for Sophie?" Sully delved pointedly. "Couldn't be that you're afraid she might get cold feet before the weddin' now?"

Peter had to admit it. He would have been a lot less worried about Sophie's reaction to her father's visit if they were already married. Sophie valued commitment too highly. That was why she'd studiously avoided it all these years. She would never walk away from her marriage vows, Peter was sure of it.

"So maybe you got a little ahead of yourselves, movin' in together," Sully smiled.

"It just takes time�" Peter argued, feeling somewhat defensive that he and Sophie weren't quite in sync yet.

"Only took Michaela five minutes after we got back from our honeymoon t'tell Dorothy t'put my fur skins in the barn�" Sully chuckled at the memory.

"Women got a need t'make a house their own," Sully continued, picturing the dining table that Michaela relocated to the living room after they had mutually agreed it would go in the kitchen. "Best not t'get in their way�"

"I know, I know," Peter nodded grimly, the watchful eyes of Sophie's goddesses still fresh in his mind.

"Not that it's easy," Sully admitted readily, recalling their many adjustments. "And we had three kids, besides. Brian would come inta our bedroom without knockin'�"

Peter smiled, envisioning Sully's predicament as he listened to him reminisce... "Michaela got so flustered she broke six dishes that first night. All 'cause Brian piped up, 'Oh, I forgot, yer sleepin' with Ma now�'"

Both men laughed openly picturing Michaela's reaction. "So what did you do?" Peter asked amusedly.

Sully peered mischievously over his coffee cup. "Left the dishes 'til mornin'," he answered with a wide grin and a twinkle in his eye.

"Guess we're pretty much alike, you and me," Sully offered in wry comparison. "Like our women skittish�"

Peter nodded ruefully at the apt description. Sophie was nothing if not skittish� "Sophie's afraid of commitment," he stated worriedly.

"Michaela was more afraid o' us bein' together," Sully revealed frankly.

"Really?" Peter was surprised, considering the passion expressed in their letters.

"Yer readin' Dorothy's book, ain't ya?" Sully smiled, adding a log to the fire. "It's all in there�"

"Haven't read that far, I guess," Peter shrugged.

"Michaela was fit t'be tied when Dorothy published it," Sully grimaced.

"Why?" Peter was curious.

"'Cause Dorothy printed their private conversations, things Michaela told her in confidence as a friend," Sully replied honestly.

"Friends don't tell your secrets," Sully mused. "And they don't keep any from ya either�" Before their wedding, Michaela had promised to be his best friend and he had betrayed that friendship only once.

Peter was struck by Sully's use of the word "friend." Friendship�Wasn't that what Sophie had said she wanted from their relationship most of all?

As the sadness crept back into Sully's voice, Peter couldn't help wondering if, maybe, Sully had meant more by his earlier remark.

"You said you knew how hard it was to keep a secret from the woman you love," Peter quoted verbatim. "You weren't just talking about me, were you?" he probed cautiously.

"Did�you ever�" Peter started to ask.

"Yeah�" Sully stared directly into the flames, incapable of looking Peter squarely in the eyes.

"What happened?" Peter whispered, fearing Sully's answer.

"I thought I was protectin' her, just like you," Sully began quietly. "That she'd be better off not knowin' and I'd tell her later when it was all over�"

"And?" Peter held his breath.

"And so that night, I sat across from her at dinner like nothin' was wrong, like I wasn't gonna help Cloud Dancing and the others escape from Palmer Creek. I listened while she told me about the quiltin' circle and we quizzed Brian on his spelling�"

Peter gulped, realizing he'd been acting the same way - distancing himself from Sophie's excitement over the house and their wedding plans. He'd listened but he'd been a million miles away. Now, as the similarities became chillingly clear, Peter's grip on his coffee cup tightened unconsciously and he found himself drawn further into Sully's story.

"I brushed her hair before bed, just like always�But, with each stroke I kept wonderin' if I should tell her, if maybe I was makin' a mistake. Finally, I just couldn't think about it anymore�Didn't wanna think about it anymore�Didn't wanna do anything but hold her in my arms and feel her nexta me�Just block out the pain and love her enough so maybe she'd forgive me."

"Sometimes I think deep down I was afraid somethin' bad might happen�that maybe I woulda been killed�and I just had t'make love to her one last time�" The desperation in Sully's voice sent shivers up and down Peter's spine.

"Afterwards, I got dressed, checked on Katie in her crib, and gave Michaela a kiss goodbye while she slept. I was only supposed to be gone a few hours�" When Sully finally turned to face Peter, there were tears in his eyes.

"I was gone a year�" Sully's rage simmered under control; he was angry with no one but himself.

"A year of my life�a year of Katie's life�a year of my marriage�when Michaela needed me most�When she never knew from one minute to the next if I was dead or alive�until she was under so much stress that she�"

Peter held his breath, waiting for Sully to finish, not sure if he was ready to hear the end of the story.

"That she miscarried our baby�" The pain etched on Sully's face was so fresh it was if it had happened only yesterday.

"I can't ever make that right again�" Sully murmured tiredly, allowing all the old hurts to flow through his body as they had a thousand times before.

"So, I should tell Sophie the truth�" Peter still felt so unsure.

"I can't tell ya anything, Peter," Sully's sigh was hollow. "You have to do what's right for you�right for Sophie."

"I love her so much�more than anything in the world," Peter whispered.

"I know you do," Sully reassured him, laying his hand on Peter's shoulder as he turned to leave.

"Michaela always said the baby we lost was a boy," Sully ended in parting, walking towards the woods. "I like t'think he'd been a lot like you�"

"No, wait�Don't go!" Peter shouted, wanting Sully to stay. There was so much more they needed to talk about.

"I won't be far�" Sully's voice echoed in Peter's head now, just as Sophie's had earlier.

As Peter tossed fitfully on the sofa, neither provided the comfort he sought or the answer to the hardest decision he would ever have to make�

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Replies:

Re: Say The Words - ch. 17 & 18 -- dqfan, 06:28:25 03/26/03 Wed
- Re: Say The Words - ch. 19 & 20 -- dqfan, 06:32:31 03/26/03 Wed
  - Re: Say The Words - ch. 21 & 22 -- dqfan, 06:37:26 03/26/03 Wed
    - Re: Say The Words - ch. 23& 24 -- dqfan, 06:41:25 03/26/03 Wed
      - Re: Say The Words - ch. 25 -- dqfan, 06:44:01 03/26/03 Wed