Subject:  SJ: The Enemy of Grace |
Author:
Eugene
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Date Posted: 00:11:43 01/29/03 Wed
"Narcissism is named after the ancient Greek myth of Narcissus who was a handsome Greek youth who rejected the desperate advances of the nymph Echo.
In punishment of his cruelty, he was doomed to fall in love with his own reflection in a pool of water.
Unable to consummate his love, he pined away and changed into the flower that bears his name to this very day." (Ref. http://www.buzzle.com/editorials/12-20-2001-8293.asp?viewPage=1)
I have come to believe that the greatest enemy of grace is narcissism. It is impossible for a completely self-absorbed person to receive grace -- even good things that only come with grace would be expected as entitlement. It is equally impossible for such a person to give grace -- their ability to give without expectation is disabled by their lack of empathy. Christians can not afford to be narcissistic.
In the many articles I read about Narcissistic Personality Disorder(NPD), the criteria for this disorder are:
(1) Feels grandiose and self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents to the point of lying, demands to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
(2) Is obsessed with fantasies of unlimited success, fame, fearsome power or omnipotence, unequaled brilliance (the cerebral narcissist), bodily beauty or sexual performance (the somatic narcissist), or ideal, everlasting, all-conquering love or passion
(3) Firmly convinced that he or she is unique and, being special, can only be understood by, should only be treated by, or associate with, other special or unique, or high-status people (or institutions)
(4) Requires excessive admiration, adulation, attention and affirmation - or, failing that, wishes to be feared and to be notorious (narcissistic supply).
(5) Feels entitled. Expects unreasonable or special and favorable priority treatment. Demands automatic and full compliance with his or her expectations
(6) Is "interpersonally exploitative", i.e., uses others to achieve his or her own ends
(7) Devoid of empathy. Is unable or unwilling to identify with or acknowledge the feelings and needs of others
(8) Constantly envious of others or believes that they feel the same about him or her
(9) Arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes coupled with rage when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted.
Arrogant, or attention-begging behaviors are easy to spot in the less sophisticated narcissistic person. But for those people who have, over the years, become experts in capturing attention and affirmation, their agenda are often hard to detect. The reason for this is simple: A narcissistic person is at the same time having grandiose expectation and insecure, poor self-image. Self-pride and self-hatred are two sides of the same thing -- self-absorption. When it comes to people in the religious community, things are further complicated since humility is a highly praised virtue. A narcissistic Christian will often take pride in his/her almost self-defacing humbleness.
Then again, I wonder if there is really such a thing as a "narcissistic Christian"?
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