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Date Posted: 06:45:49 11/10/01 Sat
Author: ：）
Subject: Re: 獨坐夜車經上水公路有感
In reply to: 社長 's message, "Re: 獨坐夜車經上水公路有感" on 09:58:47 11/06/01 Tue

>歡迎無名氏詞長光臨,
>往後也請多來貼詩交流
>
>略評如下,勿罪:
>「歸家夜寂欲長眠」寫得很好,很活.
>「搖頭太息更相憐」顧影自憐,「相」字用得很好
>通篇連貫
>但全篇的情感似未至於「涕淚漣」,有無端突兀之感

「顧影自憐」用錯了，憐指愛惜，出於潘岳的典故，用於此處稍不合。若憐字解作憐惜的話，也不太合適，因詩人沒回首看自己的影。
以上只是些無聊的說話，希望您別介意；至於「涕淚漣」，實在是詩人的真情實感，而非矯柔造作，這大可從「寂」、「殘」、「拖曳」、「怠惓」、「搖頭」、「太息」、對鏡中的自己「相憐」惜等字可見，但又基於自己寂莫，「無人可語」、再加上熱鬧的筵蓆與寂寞的歸路的對比，從而引發「涕淚漣」之感。這是我的一點意見，您認為如何？

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