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Date Posted: 01:27:34 07/05/03 Sat
Author: Third Person Aidah
Subject:

Here I am guys!

Hello guys!

I was gone for awhile.....and what....you all forgot how to amuse yourself right here on the online kampung.....>>sighzzz<<

~Aidah bemusing to herself: Didn't realize I was so important. Heehehe. A bit self-absorbed here.~

C'mon don't tell me, after 6 months of relaxing after A Levels you all actually RAN out of ideas? Hehehe. LOL.

HOW CAN YOU ALL BE BORED? FOR GOODNESS SAKE, there is LESS than a month left before school begins!

We should be busy treasuring whatever few weeks we have left! You all lah.... these things also I must teach.

But first let me explain why I was absent from this board for so long. Brace yourselves for this.

~clears throats, then takes a sip of water~

But first of all-important number 1 rule when reading this message. No eating. Serious.

Well first of all, the Sec 4/3 Proverbial Class Spirit took me hostage. Oh yes. After the fiasco of the Sec 4/3 class reunion. No kidding. Well I kinda expected of something less drastic, you know the usual not-so-scary blazing eyeballs and the "poofing" right-in-front of my eyes routine....

You know...~brings fingers to air to do the inverted commas thingy~... to "scare" me.....

Why she wants to scare me? Hell-o? Where the hell have you been? On ANOTHER message board? Go scroll down and find out. Try looking for "The Proverbial Sec 4/3 Class Spirit: The Meaning Behind It Or Rather Her. If She Has A Behind."

Anyway there I was, all tied up. Very stuck. Her accomplice was most probably the Moderator, that NPCC cadet inspector who seems to know how to tie every untie-able knot in the book.

And worse, stuck, in the same room with the Sec 4/3 Proverbial Class Spirit. I was not quite sure where I was. She did the "poofing" thing again with me and next thing I knew I poofed up somewhere else.

I was so desperate I kept mumbling "Beam me up, Scotty" hoping maybe I can "poof" myself out of there. It didn't work of course. Dashing Captain Picard from Star Trek did not materialize in front of me to rescue me.

Man....can you blame me? I was watching Star Trek BEFORE having supper when I got kidnapped. People tend to get delusional when they're hungry ok?

And there was the Sec 4/3 Proverbial Class Spirit looking very engrossed in her "Kidnapping For Dummies" book.

Sigh, to be tied up and kidnapped is terrible, but by an amateur? That's even worse.

Anyway she got rather excited when she came across this paragraph which she read to me.

"First of all, make sure that your demands are crystal clear to the negotiators in every hostage situation."

"Ha! That's simple. My demands are that all 40 members of Sec 4/3 to post a message there at least once."

She ponders. "A day. Once a day. Well, that would be too much, maybe...." She ponders again. Undecisively I might add.

"Never mind. We go on to the next step."

"Reveal the consequences, preferably one that will amount to a great tragedy if your demands are not met."

"Now, this is easy. I will COMPLETELY DESTROY Aidah's sense of humour. Muaahahhahaha. I think I captured the nuances of an evil laughter just right?"

Believe me, when I heard that I got really scared. Really. No, not because of the evil laughter. The stray cat coughing out a fur-ball sounds more scary. The thought of ME losing my humour was terrifying.

I thought I felt the urge to pee in my pants. Perhaps the fact that I just had a huge mug of Vanilla Coke before maybe contributed.

Can you imagine me at one of our future reunions, telling out a joke, and all I hear is just silence? Truly horrible. *shivers*

"However, you wouldn't want to do that. As it simply means your plan has failed. So when you want to be sure that your demands will be complied and followed, the next thing is to re-assess the value of your hostage to the the other party involved."

She looks at me. Then throws up her arms in defeat.

"Well, that's a no-brainer! Sheesh! What the hell was I thinking? Your value? The problem is the lack of thereof," she said rolling her eyeballs.

What! Here I was sitting very cooperatively helping her meet HER demands. And she complains about my value. Talk about unappreciative.

Side note: Well technically I do not actually expect my Sec 4/3 classmates to come storming in through the door to rescue me. I was not *THAT* delusional. But still I am important right? Guys? Hellooooo?

"Might as well I let you go right? Waste of time. Note to self: Select the hostage *first*. Preferably someone that will actually have an IMPACT."

I would have said "Hey!" very loudly if not for the gag.

So to cut a long story short, she let me go and I poofed back to the living room. Just in time to see the Star Trek end credits rolling. Argh. Missed Captain Picard. Again.

Well that explains my absence, as you can see. Although technically, I only accounted for just roughly an hour.

Ok ok ok. ~deadpan face~ I was busy gallivanting with my boyfriend this past few weeks. Yes, he took up a lot of my time.

~hears a huge ROAR of laughter~

You people are terrible. Can't you at least humour me a bit? Like PRETENDING to believe me? Sigh.

Fine. I was on a two-week mission to recover the weapons of mass destruction in Iraq and discover the whereabouts of Saddam Hussin.

I tried to convince my superiors that the silver cutlery fork in the palaces' kitchens could be the WMD. I mean I did *SEE* what the Moderator did with it. Unfortunately my superiors were not convinced.

~a pause...followed by another roar of laughter~

Oooooooooh.....! That mission story you ALMOST BELIEVED! But the boyfriend story you dismissed IMMEDIATELY! You all are.....too much siah...

Sigh. This is what really HAPPENED. My pc crashed. Hard drive completely *GONE*. My gawd, I spent one week trying to recover what I can. And when I finally managed, there was so many corrupted files. Horrible.

My sister told me that I looked more pathetic than Goerge Bush trying to convince the world that the Iraq war was justifiable.

Happy now? The lesson we must learn now is that.... do back-ups REGULARLY!

I will be posting regularly as soon as possible, once my pc is 100% ok.

Meanwhile have you guys heard what a round robin is? *grins*

-Third Person Aidah

PS I imposed the No Eating Rule as a piece of any food stuck somewhere in the airways is never a good idea. This is what happens if you break the No Eating rule. You know.. especially since most of my posts are the laugh-out-loud type I hope.

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