Well, -- Godawful Fan Fiction

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Date Posted: Thu, Nov 13 2003, 23:33:34
Author: Heywood
Subject: Well,
In reply to: AC 's message, "FF.net netspeak stories and some badfic to stay on-topic" on Wed, Nov 12 2003, 21:19:26

>Just curious. For those of you who report
>netspeak/non-spellchecked stories at FF.net, how do
>you classify the abuse type?

I don't. I've learned FF.net doesn't _do_ anything about it. If it's _grotesque_ (as in 100% netspeak or misspellings), I may use "Not Allowed" and specify a few quotes from the story, and the exact passage from the posting guidelines.

>I don't believe in
>reporting someone for a few typos, but some of these
>are getting ridiculous in their lack of ability to
>spell or use a spellchecker. As I said before,
>they're not even trying to write or submit stories,
>they're just puking up crap and posting it and waiting
>for all the good reviews.

Oh yes, it's happening even more now.

>And to throw in some new badfic, I present the
>following:
>
><a
rel=nofollow target=_blank >href="http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=159797
>4">Folow The Yellow Brick Road</a>. Here's the
>opening
>I don't care if the author is 13 years old. 13 is old
>enough to know better than this.

(rings gong incessantly) GET THE HOOK!
And somebody has, story not found.

>I'm still trying to figure out exactly how <a
rel=nofollow target=_blank >href="http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=155945
>0">Salesdude</a> qualifies as fan fiction. It has the
>type of humor typically found in elementary school
>playgrounds, but it's not fanfiction.

He sold 'fart-gum'. It was Japaneese for 'Overwhelming Stench'.
*****Please Do Not Duplicate Under Penalty Of Law Thank You 
Hmm, judging by the rest of the story, I wonder where he duplicated that line from. And that wasn't even fanfiction...

><a
rel=nofollow target=_blank >href="http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=158899
>9">Holiday</a> is a romance featuring two fangirls and
>the members of their favorite band in a Real Person
>story. The girls go on vacation, meet the members of
>their favorite band, fall in love and get engaged.
>All in four paragraphs! You can imagine the character
>development and drama.
>
><a
rel=nofollow target=_blank >href="http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=121811
>7">No Sanity Allowed</a> is a "random" story. This
>means it's supposed to be stupid and make no sense.
>But it's got 406 reviews. Makes me want to cry.

GOOD. GOD. Now THAT'S a review whore. Demanding reviews for chapters, and for those of you who remember the one I posted screencaps of, with the arrow pointing at the box, you ain't seen NOTHING yet. At _1280x1024_, the arrow this one's got is a large portion of my screen. For those of you at 1024x768, imagine a review-whoring arrow 3/4 the width of your monitor.

<A rel=nofollow target=_blank HREF="http://members.rogers.com/heywood/whore4.jpg">Here, take a look.</A> (it's a Paint Chop Pro-edited screencap)

Yugi: OH HOLY LORD TAKE ME NOW!
(quote from Exorcist) "Let Jesus fuck you!"

Yami: I like candy! Na na na na na na na! I like candy! Na na na na na na na!
Tea: Why must this house be cursed with gay people?
Tristen: Awww man! My feet is leaking with puss again!
Kaiba: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Bakura: Why thank you Y��5@ �)7 bjbj�2�2 .^�X�X)/��^2[pic]2[pic]2[pic]2[pic]2[pic]2[pic]2[pic]8[?]ECECECEC��5@ �)7 bjbj�2�2 .^�X�X)/��^2[pic]2[pic]2[pic]2[pic]2[pic]2[pic]2[pic]8[?]ECECECECabout the chocolate ocean!
Thirty-one more chapters of this. I weep for the future if this is what the schools are turning out...

>I think I'll go hide under my bed now.

I think I'll go find a rubber firehose.

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