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Date Posted: 01:04:22 07/31/10 Sat
Author:
Page
Subject: Sometimes the getting there is almost as nice as the actual thing >>>>
In reply to:
Page
's message, "In the immortal words of Nickelback....." on 00:21:59 07/31/10 Sat
I've had the bare bones (no, that's not a pun! *G*) of this scene almost from the very beginning, but it's been through several changes since I first wrote it. This, however, is the final draft, and I do hope you'll...er, get something out of it.
For those who aren't familiar with the story, it's January of 1969. Katie Scott has come with her live-in lover, Adam, to the birthday party of guitar god Jay Carey who just happens to be Adam's best friend and bandmate. Jay and Katie are mad for each other, and just before Christmas Jay told her he wanted her. It's been two weeks since they've seen each other, and Katie has retreated to the back of the house they're at, trying to deny what's happening between the two of them, but Jay found her.
Excerpt from Carey On
©2010 by Juli Page Morgan
Posted for purposes of critique only and does not constitute publication
Jay leaned against the wall, watching her soberly. “Did I upset you?”
“What?” She frowned, confused by the question. “Of course not.” She turned to face him. “Why would you think that?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. When I gave you the tape, it seemed like something changed between us.”
Katie braced her hands on the wall opposite him and leaned back against them. “Maybe it did.”
“Mm. Would you like to hear what I think it is?”
Her eyebrows lifted in surprise and she nodded. “Yeah, I would.”
Jay pushed himself upright and placed a hand on either side of her against the wall. He leaned close, and she could feel the heat of his body even through her velvet clothes. “We both realized this…attraction…isn’t going away.”
She licked her lips. “You’re right, it’s not.”
Jay’s eyes searched her face. “Are you sorry?”
She caught her breath. She’d sure as hell tried to be sorry, but she realized she wasn’t. Might as well be honest. “No. Are you?”
His smile was tender and he pressed his body against hers. “Not a bit,” he whispered before his lips covered hers.
Katie moaned soft in her throat and opened her lips to his probing tongue. From the moemnt she'd seen the look on his face when he opened Maureen's gift she'd known it was going to happen; knew it as surely as she knew they were playing with fire since anyone could come across them in Walter's back hall. But she couldn't have stopped even if she'd wanted to. She'd waited too long to feel his mouth on hers again, and not even the thought of discovery could deter her.
She felt him open the single button that held her jacket closed before the heat of his hands seared through the white cotton of her shirt, cupping her breasts, his thumbs teasing her nipples. She fought the urge to reach up and rip her shirt apart, aching to feel Jay’s hands on her bare flesh. And not just his hands; she could almost feel his lips on her breasts, his tongue teasing her nipples as he drew them into his mouth. Her knees grew weak at the thought of his black hair against her skin, his head framed by the lace ruffles of her open shirt.
Katie freed her hands from behind her and slid them down his chest, feeling his nipples, hard and erect through the light covering of fabric. Her fingers curved as she lightly scratched her nails across his shirt, then moved lower to slip around his waist and over his ass, urging him closer.
“Touch me, Katie,” he whispered almost too low to hear. “I need you to touch me.”
Her hands clutched the rough fabric of his jeans. She wanted to touch him, to feel that hardness pressing against her hand through the denim, feel it swell and twitch at the touch of her fingers tracing its outline; to pull open the snap of his jeans and lower the zipper until she could get her hand inside, feel him hot and heavy and growing larger in the grip of her fingers. Behind her closed eyes, she could see herself slide down his body until her knees made contact with the thin brown carpet, pulling his jeans down just enough to release him from the confinement of his clothing. Her breath grew labored at the thought of looking up at him to make sure he was watching her as she put her tongue out and touched it to the tip of his cock, tasting him for the first time, hearing him groan and feeling his hands clutch her hair. All this went through her mind in the split second before she replied, “I can’t.”
“Yes, you can,” he insisted, spreading kisses over her face.
“No, I can’t. I won’t be able to stop at touching you. I want to taste you.”
Jay became immobile for a frozen second at her words. “Christ!” he muttered and devoured her lips again.
Melting into him, Katie lifted one thigh high on his hip, desperate to bring their bodies into closer contact. She felt his hand pulling her other thigh up, her black velvet pants a thin barrier to his touch. The feel of his fingers clutching her drove Katie over the edge of desire into surrender and she locked her legs around his waist. Never had admitting defeat felt so good.
Jay’s hand slid under her and she felt him stroke her through her pants between her open thighs. She gasped at his touch and rolled her head against the wall.
“I want you so much, Katie,” he murmured against her lips. “I could take you right now against this wall.” His fingers continued to stroke her, and little whimpering noises came from her throat. “But I want more,” he breathed, “I want you spread out across my bed so I can feel every inch of you against me, feel your hair on my skin, feel your lips on me. And after you’ve tasted me, I want to taste you. To lick you, and suck you, and nibble you, and…”
“Yes,” she sighed, and ran her tongue up his neck, tasting the salt of the light sweat that had broken out on his skin.
Jay groaned and pulled her tight against him. “Damn, Katie, you drive me mad.”
“I want you,” she whispered against his lips and rotated her lower body on his. “Please, Jay.”
Jay’s eyes met hers, and the raw emotion she saw in them stopped her breath. He wrenched her wrists from around his neck and pinned them above her against the wall, holding her captive. Shaking his hair back, he brought his face within an inch of hers. “Don’t play with me, Katie. I can’t take this. I want you more than I’ve ever wanted any woman in my life.” There was nothing gentle about his voice now; it was ragged and hoarse and full of lust. “I want you and I’ve got to have you, do you hear me?”
“I’ve got to have you, too.” Her voice trembled with the force of her emotions. “I want you so much it’s all I can think about.”
The look in Jay’s eyes changed from raw urgency to one so tender it almost stopped her heart. He released the tight grip on her wrists and slid his hands upward, lacing his fingers with hers. “When?” he whispered, his forehead against hers.
“Not here, not tonight.”
“No, not here.” His fingers tightened on hers. “When?”
“Next week. After you play The Marquee.” She put a shaking hand across his lips as he opened them to speak. "Let me wait until then to break things off with Adam. I'll tell him then." Unable to resist the feel of his body, she arched against him. “Just wait until after that first show, and then we can…”
“Yes, we can,” Jay interrupted. “And we can, and we can, and we can again.” His warm hands cupped her face. “How the fuck am I going to get through the next week when all I want is to be inside you?” He kissed her again and ground his body into hers.
Katie wasn’t expecting the powerful orgasm that ripped through her and cried out against his lips in a mixture of pleasure and surprise as her body shuddered against his. Her bones turned to liquid fire and if he hadn't been holding her against the wall she would have fallen to the floor at his feet.
"Oh my Christ, Katie," Jay groaned. "That feels so sweet."
Still shuddering with the fading spasms, Katie took his face between her hands and ran the tip of her tongue along his bottom lip. "Do it to me again."
"Well, happy birthday to you, mate."
For one whirling, confused moment, Katie thought Adam's voice was just an illusion. But when she felt Jay's body turn to stone against hers, she knew it was all too real.
Last edited by author: Sat July 31, 2010 01:09:58
Edited 2 times.
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Love this scene... --
debikm, 11:43:54 07/31/10 Sat
From the moemnt typo she'd seen the
>look on his face when he opened Maureen's gift
With that taken care of...oh my God... I love the breathless anticipation, the intensity of their feelings, despite the fact that Adam is so close to both of them and neither one of them wants to hurt him. I can feel their passion for one another, that feeling of wanting to explode with the strength of need. Love it, love it, LOVE IT!!
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Gotta love the spellcheck on Word >>>> --
Page, 20:49:15 08/03/10 Tue
> From the moemnt typo she'd seen the
>>look on his face when he opened Maureen's gift
Evidently "moemnt" is a word. MSWord thinks so, anyway, because it didn't flag it. *G* Glad you caught it!
>
>With that taken care of...oh my God... I love the
>breathless anticipation, the intensity of their
>feelings, despite the fact that Adam is so close to
>both of them and neither one of them wants to hurt
>him. I can feel their passion for one another, that
>feeling of wanting to explode with the strength of
>need. Love it, love it, LOVE IT!!
Oh, Debi, that's exactly the kind of reaction I was hoping this excerpt would get! (((Hugs))) It's Katie's moment (spelled right! *G*) of surrender, and I needed it to be powerful. Thank you so much!!
Last edited by author: Tue August 03, 2010 20:49:50
Edited 1 time.
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Re: Sometimes the getting there is almost as nice as the actual thing >>>> -- Page2, 11:35:34 08/01/10 Sun
From the moemnt TYPO she'd seen the look on his...
Other than the typo above, I loved it. The build-up for their passion is all in there and you almost can't wait for it to happen. Then you have Adam watching... I feel for the guy, I do.
Great job Juli!
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Man, y'all have good eyes, for which I am profoundly grateful! >>> --
Page, 20:54:51 08/03/10 Tue
> From the moemnt TYPO she'd seen the look on
>his...
>
Never trust MSWord's spellcheck. Always trust the members of the Lit Forum!
>Other than the typo above, I loved it. The build-up
>for their passion is all in there and you almost can't
>wait for it to happen. Then you have Adam
>watching... I feel for the guy, I do.
I'm so chuffed you like it! Especially that you almost can't wait for it to happen - that's what I was aiming for. (((Hugs))) And I'm glad you feel for Adam. Even though Katie was trying to do the right thing by waiting until that first show was over to break up with him, and although he did bring a lot of it on himself by being so stubborn, Adam still got a raw deal.
>
>Great job Juli!
Thanks, Steph!
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Ah yes. The hallway scene >>> --
Myxtress, 15:31:03 08/09/10 Mon
I do so remember the first time this was posted. And I've watched it morph into something totally brilliant.
And just for the record. I don't feel sorry for Adam at all here. He was acting like an a$$ and while I don't think walking in on somethink like this is anything I'd ever wish to happen to anyone, it wasn't as if it was unexpected now was it. Treating her that badly, excluding her, and basically letting his fear of losing her, lose her. Well done Jay.
And you too Page! *G*
Hugs
Esther
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