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Date Posted: 18:47:57 08/06/10 Fri
Author: 
Page
Subject: Something similar >>>>
In reply to:
debikm
's message, "Rayne's been talking to me again" on 21:23:04 08/05/10 Thu
Three weeks after I found out I was pregnant with DD1, my mom was killed in a traffic accident, before I could tell her about the baby. I was already in a tailspin because the baby's father had freaked right out of what little mind he had upon hearing the word "pregnant" and had packed up and moved to West Virginia! (Drastic, don't you think? I did.) During all of this upheaval, my younger brother enlisted in the Marine Corps and went off to South Carolina, and my father, unable to bear what had happened, sold our house and moved to Arkansas. And there I was, alone. It was not a good time. While sobbing on the phone one night to a very dear friend about how I was wondering how my life could go on like that, she said something I've never forgotten: "Of course your life will go on. It's just not the way you thought it would." She was, of course, spot on. I'd had this idealized version of what I thought it should be like and didn't want to even consider any other scenarios. She also said, "No one likes change, especially the changes that kick you right in the heart. But things change all the time, and we adapt." (This was Maureen, incidentally, the one I've based the character in CO on. See why I loved her so much?)
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Perfect! -- debikm, 21:25:07 08/06/10 Fri
>Three weeks after I found out I was pregnant with DD1,
>my mom was killed in a traffic accident, before I
>could tell her about the baby. I was already in a
>tailspin because the baby's father had freaked right
>out of what little mind he had upon hearing the word
>"pregnant" and had packed up and moved to West
>Virginia! (Drastic, don't you think? I did.)
What a dick!
During
>all of this upheaval, my younger brother enlisted in
>the Marine Corps and went off to South Carolina, and
>my father, unable to bear what had happened, sold our
>house and moved to Arkansas. And there I was, alone.
>It was not a good time. While sobbing on the
>phone one night to a very dear friend about how I was
>wondering how my life could go on like that, she said
>something I've never forgotten: "Of course your life
>will go on. It's just not the way you thought it
>would." Wise words indeed. She was, of course, spot on. I'd had this
>idealized version of what I thought it should
>be like and didn't want to even consider any other
>scenarios. She also said, "No one likes change,
>especially the changes that kick you right in the
>heart. But things change all the time, and we adapt."
> (This was Maureen, incidentally, the one I've based
>the character in CO on. See why I loved her so much?)
I see and do understand why you love her so. I've always been very much a loner, not always by choice. An only child, didn't participate much in things in school, didn't have close friends(and still don't with a few transitory exceptions). And to top it off, I'm actually rather shy. I just have learned to hide it by being a goof. So that's why I worry about not writing families well; I've never experienced the dynamics of siblings and children any closer than a generation removed. And that's not ever going to change.
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But you know something? >>>> -- Page, 15:22:12 08/08/10 Sun
From reading your work, one would think you came from a large family with lots of siblings. You have that family dynamic down pat, especially the relationship between adult siblings.
I just thought of something, too. You're an only child and write characters with brothers and sisters. I'm one of three children and write characters who have no siblings. *G* Wonder what that's about? Ah, the subconscious; I guess we all want to experience what we don't have.
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Very true... -- debikm, 16:28:36 08/08/10 Sun
>From reading your work, one would think you came from
>a large family with lots of siblings. You have that
>family dynamic down pat, especially the relationship
>between adult siblings.
Thank you. I do have years of observing my parents' families interact, all multiple siblings and get along very well.
>
>I just thought of something, too. You're an only
>child and write characters with brothers and sisters.
>I'm one of three children and write characters who
>have no siblings. *G* Wonder what that's about? Ah,
>the subconscious; I guess we all want to experience
>what we don't have.
That's probably it. I have another writing friend who is an only child and she writes families with siblings too. And i've found myself writing small woman recently. Molly and Valerie are petite. Next to them I'm like a Clydesdale...;-)
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