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Saturday, May 16, 12:13:18pm [ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, [2], 3, 4, 5, 6 ]

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Date Posted: 22:23:39 01/09/04 Fri
Author: lynece
Subject: Oh Lauren, I know exactly how you are feeling!
In reply to: Lauren 's message, "the whole world" on 16:13:03 01/09/04 Fri

I lived in a ward that main goal seemed to be multiplying. And I hated it! I hated having due date lists passed around in RS and having every neighbor on both sides and across the street just have baby after baby. I hung out in the bathroom many times during sacrament meeting crying and we didn't even go on FAst sundays as there were multiple blessings each month.

I don't have any words of advice, I became the most inactive I'd ever been in my life. It had nothing to do with the gospel, but the people and the babies that I couldn't stand to be around.

I would let your companion know how much it hurts, not to hurt her of course, but let her know that you'd rather not talk about her pregnancy and if necessary as she gets further along, you might ask to be paired with an older or younger(single) sister.

Good luck sweetie. You are not alone and we do understand.
Love, Lynece

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Replies:

[> I totally agree with Lynece....m -- Jo, 18:28:01 01/11/04 Sun

Tell her what your issues are at the present time - note to her that you know in the future these feelings will find a newer home, but for now, they are residing in your heart. And I would seriously consider asking for an older companion that is not in her childbearing years...or one that has had at least experienced a similar loss. Sometimes it is just the fact that you are with someone who knows the journey you are on that makes all the difference in the world.

Somehow, I could tolerate people who had had a los becoming pg more than just 'anyone' in the ward...and like Lynece, the primary end bathroom became my place to exist on many Sundays. One thing that kept me going was that others who had had a loss told me to be patient with myself and not to do more than I could...well, it became my mantra and if I couldn't tolerate something, I said so (the first was a mom in the nursery who was very pg and whining/complaining and I finally just said it like it was - that I'd be so grateful to change places with her and I'd cut off my right arm to have all of those discomforts).

Anyhow, just know that it will pass - do only what you feel you can.

Jo


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