(Shazaam watched from a distance as his mother raced towards the returning for of Steel Dream. His eyes squeezed tightly as to block out the image. Or maybe replace Steel's figure with another. Turning quickly, Shaz took refuge within the tenebrous cloaks, but still looked on. His mind wandered as he repeated the eye squeezing movements, time after time after time again. Yet the chestnut form of the old King could never be replaced by a bay figure. A bay figure that everyone had forgot... or so it seemed. Especially his mother. Yes, Steel had been like a father to Shazaam since Myrakazan died... but Myr was still Shaz's father... and he found himself often thinking back upon his sire during the days, more or less when he saw his mother and Steel together. She never seemed to have express the love she had for Steel, the same way she had done it to Shaz's father. It seemed stronger when she was with Steel. Shaz bit his lip as more venomous thoughts coursed through his mind. His eyes closed as he tried bleakly to block them. But they flooded his mind like a foreign toxin. Was Shaz the only one who remembered his father? At times, the bay King would often pace the shoreline, thinking. He never saw his mother just stop and think. From his point of view, it seemed as if DOL had forgotten her first love. Or was it simply lust the first time? Shazaam grimaced at this thought, a simple hiss oscillating through vocals. It seemed that the freedom of Sunny had never been at stake. That no one's life had been sacraficed to save Shazaam's only biological sister. He sighed slightly. Finally opening his eyes, the bay stallion didn't bother making a move towards Steel to greet him. Instead he moved from the shadows with a stiffened gait. His movement halted once in full view, vision lingering over the chestnut for a long while, a slight glare hovering over expressions before he took off once again. His attention obviously required elsewhere. Vision mingled over the rest of the cadre, seeking out his own family, and maybe a filly or two, that he had yet to meet)
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I can't acheive the impossible -- Steel Dream, 12:22:44 07/24/03 Thu [1]
[OOC: I'm sorry for the crappiness of this post but I dun have that much time and I just want to get something out.]
His eyes close for a cresting moment of perfect bliss as she rests tenderly against him, his sins, however grave, undeservedly forgiven. But that moment is the crest of a wave of emotions and waves are ever moving; her words catch him off balance and send him spinning into a trough. "My son..." he breathes in faint disbelief, his golden eyes soaking up everything about this little one and recording it into his mind, trying to let this information sink into his already battered brain.
His thoughts reel and whirl like a dinghy caught in a gale as he tries to compose the varying elements of his current situation into a coherent plan of action.
Firstly, he's home. DOL still loves him, still wants him by her side. Secondly, he has a son. A son by his own blood, mingled with the genes of his love. Thirdly and painfully, the one he has for so long considered a son, invested so much into without Nature's standard reward of having his own genes passed on, appears to hate or resent him. Actually, Steel is in no way surprised. He has the love of the young King's mother and the addition of this new surprise to the varied and extended family is bound to cause a distinct sour chord with the son of Myrakazan.
But that doesn't stop it from hurting. It does not stave off the knife-wound Shazaam's acerbic gaze makes into his heart. And he is so thoroughly torn. To lean down, to greet his own new son, the only male descendant of his physical line, to imprint his own image and scent in the little one's mind... that is his primary urge, as an equine and as a father. But something deeper, something less primal and instinctive calls him to follow Shazaam, to tell him what he is thinking right now:
Oh Shaz... Shazaam... I never tried to be a replacement for your father. I did it for his sake and, I thought, for yours. Myrakazan was my friend and he was one of the most incredible stallions I have ever known. He died for your sister's freedom and would have done the same for you, I know. And I know I could never hope to live up to him in reality or in your mind. But I made him a promise that I would do all I could for you, look after you like a father though I knew I was not one. I saw you growing up to be more and more like him and I cannot even begin to express how proud that made me, and how much I wished he could have been here to see you grow as I have. I have thought about him, Shazaam. I have. That's why it took so long, so many years for me to acquire the courage to make my love of DOL known. I couldn't for so long, for the sake of his memory, for your sake, for Sunny's... and for hers. Because I didn't feel it would be right to put her in the position of deciding between me and his memory, even if she did actually love me which I was convinced she did not.
But now I'm thinking myself in circles and I still do not know what to do. So he casts a fleeting desperate gaze to Shazaam as he departs as though to tell him just to wait a little longer and leans down, the broad arcs of his nostrils expanding as he whuffles gently at the little foal. "Phoenix Ashes," he whispers softly, gazing into his son's eyes for the first time as a little smile touches his face. "Nice to meet you."
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Time's only Mistress -- Daughter of Time, 20:48:39 07/24/03 Thu [1]
Silven flicka, though still young, understood most of the scene before her as she watched without movement. Seeing the look on Shazaam's face, she walked over to stand by him, knowing he would not wish for words now, for she had gone through something very similar, and would never wish it upon another. She could see things from his standpoint, for she, she out of the small group, had been in his shoes, and had never in even her wildest fury, wished the same fate upon any other. Standing there, her bodice mere inches from his, she looked down upon the scene thoughtfully, before looking up at him, then back. She did not fear him now, for now they were on the same page. Her mind flashed back to another time, another place, though similar to this, and thoughts of her own mother and many others raced through her mind as her dial remained expressionless, revealing none of her internal pain.
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Wow a return. -- Steel Destiny, 20:51:45 07/24/03 Thu [1]
A soft smile curled her lips as she watched her father return. She knew he couldn't be kept at bay for long, the chestnut Cob belonged here more than anyone else she knew. Her heart, eased of tension, was content now that she had her entire family surrounding her. Well, save her mother. A few blinks saved the frustration for later, now was not the time to scrutinize her mother's poor reasoning for abandonment. All she had now was her father and DOL, the closest thing to a mother her mind had ever known.
Her amber tail swished idly over her flanks as deep chocolate eyes took in the scene. The little roaned colt pushed before his father, as if an offering. She shot a brief smile at Shazaam, promising herself to chat with him at some point in time. Dropping her head ever so slightly she hung back from the reunion.
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Just a quick interruption. -- Ellie, 21:37:13 07/24/03 Thu [1]
From her grazing between the sandy bars of the Isle she spotted the return of the old King. She watched a few horses congregate, one of which being a filly from the Tournament. She immediatly stood by Shazaam who was obviously going through an unsure time in his short life. Geez now I know why they were all herded to the beach, she thought brusquely, sneaking behind the filly. Sharp ears flick to wait for a heat in conversation so she won't be noticed. A sigh escaping her, she nipped the filly resoloutly on the butt. "I think it's time you went back to the beach," she whispered sternly. "Bit of a private time, don't you think?" She asked, not expecting or wanting an answer. If the filly were at all observant she would've noticed that no one dared interrupt the turbulent rejoining between Daughter of Light, Steel Dream, Shazaam, and Steel Destiny. They were all family members, whereas Daughter of Time was not, no matter her previous dire situations that she thought matched the current ones.
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Excuse me -- Daughter of Light, 21:52:47 07/24/03 Thu [1]
The arrival of someone in terrible pain yanks her hearstrings back to their proper place. Turning, chocolate eyes moving swiftly past those gathered some distance away, she sees a small filly, not one from the tournament, favoring a badly injured leg. "I must go help that filly," she excuses herself gently. "It cannot wait. Phoenix, stay here." The mare pulls away, trotting up the slight incline. She pauses at her eldest son, looking with concern. "Shazaam, please talk to me when I have healed that filly," she pleads, turning with her heart aching from the look of betrayal she saw in her son.
Phoenix heeds his mother's words of his own accord, reaching up his tiny nose to touch his father's. Attempting to mimic his mother's behavior, he snorts lightly before taking a baby-soft breath. He folds his knees under him and curls up between his father's --the knowledge was instinctive-- front hooves. He stares reproachfully at those gathered on the hill from his protected position. He had tolerated the crowd as his mother did, but she had left and thus given him permission to do with crowds as he felt like doing. At the moment, he was entirely confused by the ongoings and simply wondering why everything seemed to be happening at once in his short life.
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Aww -- Ellie, 00:25:12 07/25/03 Fri [1]
Halfway out of the conversation, Ellie halted and dropped her head down to stare at the little colt. A sly grin crept onto her face. A deep yearning for one of her own blood shoved into her eyes, always the betrayers of emotion. Her long thick tail snapped at her sides and she guided Daughter of Time duitifully back to the Beach.
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Time's only Mistress -- Daughter of Time, 18:06:16 07/25/03 Fri [1]
Dazzling miniature siren stood frozen, the only animation about her being her smoky rivers flowing in the ocean breeze. The nip that had been placed upon her flank bothered her not, she did not even flinch. SHe had no reason to dis-respect this mare, but at the same time, she had no reason to respect her. As she was sranding away from the group, only by Shazaam, she felt she was not interupting, as she said not a word. She had no reason to return to the beach now. She answered none of the mare's rude comments, and stood. She would not be herded like a common cow to the slaughter, she was one to stand her ground. She was doing nothing worng, merely being there for those in pain.
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(Any your comfort is not needed) -- (Shazaam), 20:11:44 07/25/03 Fri [1]
(Shazaam watched the looks that were exchanged between DoL, himself, Steel, DoT, Destiny and Ellie. He cast a blank gaze towards DoT as she moved towards him. His irritation at the moment was at an all time high, and her attempt to comfort him were doing nothing good, if only rising his irritation. She had no idea. She thinks she has gone through what Shaz has, but she hasn't, and don't try to say different. He stepped away from her with a stiffened gate, but turned back when she ignored the signal for Ellie)
"DoT, let me give you some advice. Being independent, and cocky are good. To an extent. When the Second Commanders of the territory you are in, tell you to move, you had best listen to them."
(He was sick of playing the Mister Nice Guy when his emotions were snipped at with the scissors of others. And now was not the time he was going to choose to hold back.)
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[ . Annoyance . ] -- Tori, 19:33:15 07/25/03 Fri [1]
[ . Leaving her son playing happily in a secluded location, the golden mare moved silently t'wards her beloved. Normally light eyes darkened at the sight of the filly, obviously intruding on an emotional family scene. A small half smile is flashed in the direction of the back-up mare, whose thoughtful actions had been rebuffed by the stubborn filly. Taking care to remain quiet, the palomino positioned herself very close to Daughter of Time's ear and spoke, her voice deceptively calm . ]
..My dear, might I suggest that you give them some privacy. I'm sure you wish to pass along your good wishes or share your experiences, but now is neither the time nor the place. You might want to heed the advice of the back-up. She didn't gain her position out of misguided stubborness..
[ . Knowing she probably sounded harsh, but not being particularly worried about it, the palomino fixed a steely gaze on Daughter of Time. Little did the filly know, Shaz was intensely private, and this intrusion would only hurt later attempts at friendship. Not speaking again, the mare moved away as silently as she had come forward, taking her own advice and leaving the family to reunite in peace. She would offer her own comfort to her mate when the time was right . ]
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Time's only Mistress -- Daughter of Time, 21:29:37 07/25/03 Fri [1]
Steely glare directed at ehr was met with one similar. She did not like being commanded. Turning her soft orbs to Shaz, she nodded in understanding, words still not forthcoming. She would leave on her own terms, and so she did. Understanding his wish to be alone, she bowed and trotted off, shaking her head at the actions of all those who were so rude at her silent attempt at kindness. Her mind raced as thoughts passed through her mind. Maybe I should leave now, they all seem to hate me. I wonder if the Neutrals would accept a fiully. If I had to, I guess I could go over to the Darks. I guess I could learn to be mean. I wonder if DOL will kick me out now. I probably deserve it. Man! Sometimes I wish I could control my kindness at times. It always seems to get me in trouble... All these thoughts and more raced through her mind as she made her way silently to the beach, smoky talons raking shallow trenches in the ivory sand. If she did have to leave, she had some goodbyes to say first. A single tear streamed down her face, the one time she had let herself cey in a place where others could see. Shaking it off, she rubbed her face on her shoulder, trying to wipe away all traces of weakness. She could not show weakness, if she did, she might not survive...
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Frustration -- Ellie, 11:02:16 07/26/03 Sat [1]
She pinned her ears as she watched the filly go. So, she didn't see the need to respect and elder and a greater in position, hm? Just because she was an aspiring Queen and Ellie was a lowly back-up mare didn't mean possum poop (*player sobs uncontrollably*). She cast a thankful, but worried glance at Shaz and nodded politely to Tori, whom she had not yet met, and exited the conversation stage right.
(ooc: as to the possum thing *sob* my horse *sob* has EPM *sob sob* Which explains a few things, but I'm still upset. I don't think it's life-threatening, and we caught it early enough that it won't be disabilitating... *sob*)
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AWW! *huggle* -- Ashley, 13:38:07 07/26/03 Sat [1]
I'm sure your horse will be fine! *snugs* We love you! I hope your horse gets better VERY soon and VERY quickly! And thoroughly! *hugs again* If you dip in and out of activity the next while, we'll understand.
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Thanks... -- Meg, 21:28:15 07/26/03 Sat [1]
As to activity, you know of my loooong hiatus. I'll post it somewheres else... I'm going up to the barn, the barn I'm at now will give him EXCELLENT care while I'm gone (damn straight, he'll need like a shot a day for treatment... my poor horsey! I feel so bad... like him eating or coming into contact with possum poop could've somehow been my fault but STILL.. he's my horse)
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Meep -- Fran, 22:28:22 07/26/03 Sat [1]
Sorry to be such a follower of trends but I'm not feeling very well and hence not really up to posting much... I will post but not very regularly necessarily for the next few days, just letting y'all now
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omg i'm SOOO sry! -- Shan(Chime's player), 02:01:08 07/27/03 Sun [1]
VERY sry 2 be interrupting, i've just been following this thread- Meg, i am SOOOO sry! a friend's horse had epm & from experience w/ her i can guess how hard it must be on you. *hugs* i hope he gets better! & again, sry for interrupting
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aw thanks! -- Meg, 15:13:45 07/27/03 Sun [1]
I hope he does too! Thanks for all the support everyone!
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