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Date Posted: 18:47:53 10/28/05 Fri
Author: Sunshine
Subject: Re: I have rewatched the scene
In reply to: Sophist 's message, "Re: I have rewatched the scene" on 18:12:38 10/28/05 Fri

But that is not the end of the scene. Again, you conveniently leave out the final part of the scene where he does say “If he’s the one…”. I think you have to look at the entirety of the scene. At the beginning of the scene, when he approached Buffy in the alley, I thought “Oh no, here goes another of Xander’s patented abusive diatribes”. But that was not the way it turned out. If Riley was not about to leave, I would have recommended that Xander just back off and talk to Buffy later but this was an emergency – there was no time to let things cool off if the end result was to prevent Riley from leaving. As I said, “I think he could have been a little softer and maybe a bit less aggressive”, but he is never going to be Dr. Phil. I am going to give him the benefit of the doubt and interpret that he really was trying to help Buffy. You obviously feel differently. So be it.

he meant it at the time. But to me, true sincerity means acting consistently with those sentiments thereafter. If that is the standard, I would never feel comfortable ever saying anything because my feelings might later change and I would be guilty of insincerity. When it comes to just about everything in life, you never have perfect knowledge. You just have to do the best you can to honestly evaluate the situation and act accordingly. That is the best one can do – act on the knowledge you currently posses. Otherwise, you will never act which will prevent you from making a mistake but I do think this is a wise way to live. I think Xander was immature and remained so. Of all the characters, he never seemed to really grow. You could plop down season 7 Xander in season 1 and, except for the fact that he dressed better and had put on a few pounds, he would be indistinguishable from the original season 1 Xander. What he did to Anya was horrendous but it did not stem from his lack of sincerity, it was due to his emotional immaturity and the inability or unwillingness to confront his inner demons. In terms of judging a person’s sincerity and commitment, I think you put the bar a bit too high. Maybe you can achieve these standards, I, and I think a lot of other people, will be found wanting.

As I said, I do not like Xander. When the “I hate Xander” parade is held, I plan to be marching in front, holding a big banner. I think there are plenty of indisputable examples of Xander acting like a jerk. I just don’t think this is one of them.

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