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Date Posted: 07:39:04 11/25/13 Mon
Author: Ravenbeauty
Subject: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this.

For my kind and gracious friends out here,

Yesterday was a particularly bad day for me with pain (some days the pain is better controlled, where as others not so much). The lesion has been growing again (kind of like having a barometer on the skin, which tells you how badly things are going on internally, and that the cancer is most likely on the move again). That lesion had stopped growing when I began chemo in January of this year (it is now growing yet again). I try to put my best foot forward and think positive, but I have been scared (understandably).

I checked in here yesterday, and found one of the most chilling and evil posts I have ever seen in my life. Only a monster could have written it. Someone who has a heart filled with hatred and sickness. A normal human being could have never left a message like this. It was already a bad morning for the reasons mentioned above. I sat here sickened and completely horrified as I read this toxic, poisonous, note left for me in response to me simply writing a one sentence comment in regard to what Disney has done by now formally canceling Soapnet. I stated the following:

The mouse just plunged that dagger in even further. The killing continues......

This is what I found waiting for me yesterday (at least I have the decency to not show this person's IP address, although it clearly showed that they live near Las Vegas Nevada):

http://www.voy.com/fo/cgi/spamreport?m=10281[Del] [Appr] Status: UNAPPROVED
Date Posted: 13:27:51 11/23/13 Sat
Author: Jojo
Subject: Re: Disney cancels Soapnet - Raven's thoughts
In reply to: GoodWillTalking 's message, "Disney cancels Soapnet - Raven's thoughts" on 12:20:07 11/13/13 Wed

Why would someone who has allegedly been fighting cancer for years make such a flip remark about death and killing? Because you are a FAKE. When are you going to stage your death or miraculous cure? Your Camille shtick is getting old "Ravey."

I was so stunned and taken aback by this, that I contacted my dear friend, actress Catherine Hickland, and told her about this horrendous venomous post, and felt sick to my stomach even thinking about it. Cat asked if I knew who it was, and that she would set them straight on this, as she went to chemo with me, but because they didn't have the courage to do this on my Facebook Page, where I have 5000 eyes and ears, and chose to do it here where almost no one really goes anymore, I couldn't tell her who the coward was. I did track them down to an area near Las Vegas Nevada, but that's all I have for now.

This is not an opinion, and I am a real person behind that pen name, which I have used for years. Lady Gaga is no less a singer because she chooses to use a stage name. It's called defamation of character, and if you know anything about the law, people are winning law suits of $5000 and more, from slander and defamation on Facebook, and in other places online every day now. If I were truly lying about having cancer, the defendant in a slander case would win, and my case would be dismissed. If they called me poor and I was poor, that would not be slander. In other words, defamation is when someone has slandered you publicly, and it was not true (particularly a matter this sensitive, this serious, and involving malice and evil to the extreme), which could lead to someone losing everything over something like this (not so trivial is it). The defendants are always shocked when this happens because they think it's just the internet, and it was just a screen name, but I guess they never bothered contacting an attorney to know what is now being done with Internet slander. Incidents like these are no longer being laughed off anymore. It's costing people some serious money.

I can tell you with absolute certainty that no judge in the world would be anything less than outraged by someone who has the audacity and pure evil to accuse someone of lying about having something as serious as cancer. Not only would my Oncologist appear in court with me (he is like family to me and is the reason I am still alive when technically this cancer should have taken me out by now), but we would bring all the records to court showing every surgery, every setback, and every appointment, and you can match those to every status update I have ever written sharing this nightmarish journey with you.

I have been honest about every single detail of this nightmare, which I have chronicled over the past 25 months (not years)! I have already beaten the odds by making it past the dreaded 18 months we are usually given when diagnosed with this extremely rare, aggressive, form of cancer (Angiosarcoma).

I had to make a decision in late 2011 to either tell you what was going on with me or not say anything at all. I chose to share every detail of this battle because I knew it could be truly cathartic for me (and it has been), and because maybe it could help others, who may find a strange looking lesion appear on their breast some day, and know that they may be dealing with more than just a rash or what they perceive to be a mosquito bite (I wanted to bring awareness to this rare form of breast cancer). I have never taken a dime from a soul out there. Many have offered to raise money to help us with the copays, and I have always refused and said no (and this will never change).

What I have asked for instead are genuine prayers on my behalf, as those are more precious than gold. There is nothing to be gained by sharing this with you. Anyone can see that my official Facebook page was just as busy, if not busier, than it was BEFORE I was diagnosed with this nightmarish cancer. I certainly didn't need anymore attention!! The whole thing is truly disgusting, and obviously borne out of sheer jealousy and hatred.

I have been battling Epithelioid Angiosarcoma, which has metastasized, since late 2011 (my extra wide incision, double Mastectomy, was done in late October of 2011). Googling this cancer will give you some idea of what I am going through. This cancer eats away at your organs, and spreads easily and rapidly, as it is cancer of the blood vessels. The pain is excruciating. There have been days when I felt that I could not go on with this anymore, but I fight with my heart and soul to stick it out, and try to beat the odds as best I can. I am no "Camille". I am not a victim, I am a survivor. I am a warrior in spirit, who's body has been ravaged by a deadly cancer, that has taken my health, my hair, my breasts, and threatens my life on a daily basis (infections constantly, with a dangerous MRSA infection found in my chest this past June).

The chemo induced Diabetes is causing enough problems on it's own. When people don't hear from me for a while, they will post all up and down my Facebook wall, concerned that they haven't heard from me for a while (those are usually the bad pain days where I can't sit and read things as I used to do). If sharing my journey with this cancer over the past 25 months makes me a "Camille", than you are a truly vile and evil creature. Someone may see themselves in these updates one day and not feel so alone (and nobody is putting a gun to your head to read them)! They are precious to me because they come from the heart.

Many love Catherine Hickland because she is not only beautiful and gifted, but a genuine soul in every way. She has been the kindest friend I have ever had. She has sat with me through chemo, as I am being infused. She has gone to an appointment with me, and listened to what the doctor had to say about my case and this cancer (grim). She has watched as they access my port. She has been there because she is truly a child of God, and a genuine friend (Cat has posted on my wall many things about the time we shared, as she held my hand during chemo). I'm guessing this monster missed those posts or didn't get the memo. If it were not for God, my long time Oncologist (the only one who did not give up on my case), and my faith, I wouldn't be here anymore.

Evil people, like the person who left this post for me yesterday, are soulless and have a block of ice where their hearts should be. I actually prayed for them as I said my nightly prayers last night. I prayed that God would come into their lives and help to heal the evil and unhappiness that surely lives within in them. Cat posted a comment today on her own wall in response to a post from me to say that she knows first hand what I am going through because she does. It's sad that I would even feel the need to bring this up in defense of something so ghastly and despicable. I feel sorry for whoever you are, and pray that you get the help that your spirit so desperately needs.

For the others out here, who do not have Facebook, and are not on my page, God bless you for taking the time out of your own busy schedules, with your own troubles, to encourage and help me through this. I will never forget. I never thought I would see another Birthday, Thanksgiving, or Christmas, ever again, but I am here (still alive, and yes, people can have long battles with cancer, only to succumb to them, but mine has been 25 months and counting). I didn't realize there was a time limit on a cancer battle, and that by sharing my struggles, I was a "Camille". I have much to be grateful for this coming Thanksgiving. I wish all of you a very Happy and blessed Thanksgiving. May you be blessed always. Much love to you. I am now purging this out of my system and moving forward. I needed to get this out, and I have done so. Onward and upward, focusing on what's most important. XOXO!


Last edited by author: Mon November 25, 2013 08:33:31   Edited 2 times.

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[> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- Debbie (hopeful), 12:00:21 11/25/13 Mon [1]

Raven, you are a very strong and brave woman and an inspiration to others with health problems. I have been following your journey for a while now and I'm praying that God will heal you. Keep the faith. Miracles do happen. And if anyone deserves a miracle, you do.

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[> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- Hannah (xtra huge hugs!), 12:39:31 11/25/13 Mon [1]


Bless you and all the positive thinkers who know to move forward and far away from any negativity! It really shows just how very strong you are and always will be!

My prayers for your healing keep on coming!

(((Happy Thanksgiving to You and John and your loved ones)))

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[> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- Texas friend and therapist Mandy, 17:16:26 11/25/13 Mon [1]

Dear darling Raven,
You are brave beyond measure. I remember when you spoke about having had a stalker. Well, I did too, and he almost killed me, and he changed my life FOREVER. I will never feel completely safe again in my own home, and it's in a gated guarded community and we have an extensive home security system with backups built in. I KNOW, I KNOW why you use a nickname with your posts, my dear. I cry with you for the hurt that those of us who have been stalked, have been hunted down like DOGS and often have been hurt physically, run off from our jobs, have moved to other towns, only to have the stalker show back up and rape and hurt us beyond belief.

I lived it, and I know you should definitely use a nom de plume rather than your real name, which I do not need to know.

Raven, this person did not HURT you. Words are said and the hateful move on. Picture the hurt and the hate as a big balloon- you choose the color- and hold just the string of the balloon. Let all your hurt and hate go into the balloon. It gets larger and larger as you let go of your hurt. When the balloon is fully expanded, JOYFULLY let it go and JOYFULLY let go of the negative feelings. OK? Will you do this exercise for me?

I have used it many times as a therapist and it has power over evil. Cast out the demon. Literally, send them heaven bound in your mind. Good overcomes evil. :)

Raven, with the news of the encroaching growth of the Angiosarcoma, maybe you need additional sedation just for a bit. Just to get your sea legs back. Please talk to your doctor about your ongoing issues with pain control and the worry over the new growth of your Angiosarcoma.

None of us were put into this world to suffer one minutes' worth of pain with cancer. There are SO MANY drugs which alleviate pain and anxiety and do not turn a person into a zombie. Please find things which will work for you so you can relax and enjoy every day leading up to the New Year.

I am praying for you, my sister. God is sufficient unto all our needs, and He sends people to help us a lot more than Satan sends people to hurt us.

Wishing you a blessed Thanksgiving and holiday season.

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[> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- jordan, 05:42:43 11/26/13 Tue [1]

raven I take care of my medically fragile sister--both parents have passed on. For the last 6 years i never know if she will make it from one day to the next.. I only concentrate on the positives in life.. The birds, the cats that play in our backyard...I have neighbors that look down on myself for taking care of her...But does any of them help me out.. never...My point is if people want to say bad stuff about you.. they have a very empty life...I would just concentrate of the positive stuff in your life...You need your energy and strength to make through each day..

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[> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- Rapido, 07:23:14 11/26/13 Tue [1]

I'm sorry for the distress this has caused you. I cannot explain such meaness.

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[> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- JanLovesAMC, 09:02:46 11/26/13 Tue [1]

Hi Raven! It saddens me to read your comments from that sick individual, but I gotta say, I am NOT shocked or surprised. I was actually waiting for someone to make such an accusation. Some people feel extremely comfortable to make such comments since they think they will remain anonymous. Also, some people live such miserable lives that they enjoy inflicting pain on others. Sadly, these types of people are numb and have no remorse in stating such horrible comments...they are basically, Zombies.

...Keep the faith Raven, you have done a lot of good by sharing your struggles with this disease.

Love ya

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[> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- Ravenbeauty, 05:59:12 11/27/13 Wed [1]

Thank you guys so much. We have a rather large discussion going on in regard to this over at my Facebook. It was just stunning and cruel. I had just had enough already (everyone has a breaking point and I think most would have driven their cars off a cliff by now, with THIS cancer and the multitude of surgeries I have had to undergo to remove it). HE'S had enough of the "Camille" shtick? HE'S HAD ENOUGH (I AM LIVING IT)! My God!

If there was any justice in this world, this man would suddenly be struck down with exactly what I am facing to understand what being a "Camille" is all about (and I am sure God has a plan for such cruelty and evil sent directly from Satan). I have never seen John so angry in my life. I have never seen Cat so angry over something Internet related either, but she has made it clear how she feels under the discussion we have going.

Catherine Hickland (lying is not in this woman's DNA, and she is well respected and loved by millions out there) was there as I underwent chemo (is SHE now in on the plot too)! Only a truly sick person could even think of something like this! After Cat went to chemo with me, and posted ony my wall about how wonderful it was to see me, and what it was like being there on that day with me, as I was being infused, I thought I had put this evil sniggering to rest. Thankfully it's only been a small, but vapid group of people who have tried to imply that the nightmare I am going through is not real. I promise you that God is quite real and his justice swift. For those of you who have even dared to suggest this, you were seen by a power higher than your computer and keyboard. You cannot hide from God no matter what screen name you use.

Nobody should ever have to prove something of this magnitude to a soul, but Cat was there. She was also there with me inside the room as I talked to my Oncologist and knows how grim this cancer really is firsthand. She sat with me through the tears and made me laugh and forget about what was happening to me.

My Oncologist told me last week that I am his miracle girl because technically I should be dead, but I have made it past the dreaded 18 month mark (the most that many Angiosarcoma patients usually live). I am fighting harder than anyone can truly know. This MRSA infection, which they found in my chest near my underarm area on the right is starting to hurt again, and that kept John and I up most of the night (I don't even share just how much we are dealing with as no status update can begin to describe it). I have things going on that this man could never possibly understand, and I am a "Camille" and a fake! HOW DARE THIS MAN! DISGUSTING!

Until it's you being accused of something like this, you cannot truly understand. This is not about my scoops, it's about integrity, and my life here. We have traced the IP and it is a man living in Las Vegas. I give thanks to God for even seeing another Thanksgiving, but I wonder what this man will say at his table this year (and I bet he goes to church every Sunday too). Heretic....................

For the rest of you, may God bless you and keep you always. This man has made his bed, and he will soon lie in it.

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[> [> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- Mistyme, 11:53:25 11/27/13 Wed [1]

Raven, My heart breaks that with all your suffering, you had to read such a disgusting message!! Please know that you & John are in my prayers everyday. I am sending so much Love & Big Hugs your way!!! God Bless You!!! I hope that you & John have a wonderful Thanksgiving day!!!

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[> [> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- Anonymous, 13:36:00 11/27/13 Wed [1]

Dear Raven,
It's unfortunate that you had to get such an evil post. I believe in Karma. Having said that I wish you and John a very "Happy Thanksgiving". Love you!!!

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[> [> [> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- Barbara, 07:09:11 11/28/13 Thu [1]

I wish you and John a very Happy Thanksgiving, peace, harmony, love and healing.
This person that has done this to you, is sick in the head, and has no conscious or heart, and yes, his time to pay up will come. But he will receive no sympathy, no love, no understanding, because obviously he cannot show compassion. If you can... Forget it and him and let it go. Concentrate on yourself... How are your sugars? I think you said you were switching to Novolog Insulin. I only ask, as that is what I use with meals, and Lantus 1x a day at night. I hope it is working better for you, know you are in my prayers.
Stay strong my friend... Barbara

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[> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- dr.ivankipling, 08:39:03 11/29/13 Fri [1]

Raven please ignore the ignorant&hateful people out there. For reasons I'll never understand there are those that have so little in life to be thankful for they choose to lash out&inflict ugliness on any&everyone they can. Those are the people we pity&we pray for in spite of themselves.
Now on to other things dear angel lol. I stopped to wish you&loved ones a wonderful Thanksgiving. I hope the day was filled with love,joy,laughter&contentment.
XO :) :)XOXO
P.S. Keep your head Raven!

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[> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- GoodWillTalking, 16:55:16 12/01/13 Sun [1]

Hi Raven - I was shocked when I returned from my family vacation to read what has transpired on this site in my absence. What a horrible, soulless person to feel it necessary to spew evil upon you during the Thanksgiving holiday. This person must lead a very sad and lonely life. I hope it didn't drain all of the positive energy that your friends here have worked so hard to help keep your spirits up. We want you to feel only friendship and kindness, as you are loved and treasured. You are in my thoughts and prayers, as always.

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[> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- Laura C (Hugs), 12:28:55 12/04/13 Wed [1]

I know how much words can hurt. I cannot imagine how it was to hear such a cowardly, dark comment from someone. I hope that you will consider putting your energy and focus back where it belongs, on your fight to conquer cancer, and on the thousands of adoring fans who believe in you and want to support you every step of the way. Please don't waste any more energy on this miserable individual. Stay strong xoxo

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[> [> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- Rae, 10:54:45 12/07/13 Sat [1]

I just want to say that you should not give any thought to this sick message. People post things online that they would never say to someone's face. The result is often cruel and sick comments on websites, and this one was no different.

Take it for what is is worth: a thoughtless remark from someone who does not have the guts to ever say such an awful, false thing to your face.

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[> Re: If you have been following my battle with cancer over the past 25 months, you need to see this. You need to read this. -- Starlett, 03:37:42 12/09/13 Mon [1]

This person is SICK! He/she has poison running through the head where a brain should be. I was totally dismayed to read that someone would leave a message like that for you. My heart goes out to you Raven for having to fight this battle. Keep fighting and I will keep you in my prayers.

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