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| Subject: everything for a reason | |
Author: jade (quiet) | [ Next Thread |
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] Date Posted: 2/08/07 8:37 hello all, Its early in the morning after a night of no sleep. I met a friend in town yesterday, she was telling me about how her husband has had 3 affairs and she is still with him, its a complicated story, and she is a lovely woman, i wondered why she loves him still?? and she does, she said that she loves him and would do anything for him? is that right though?? I didnt say as much out loud however, it does transpire that she cant have children, after trying IVF 7 times now. Which probably puts a strain on the relationship but still, he meets women on line...and has affairs. sometimes this online way of meeting people makes me feel quite ill, its so easy to do. I know ive done it. It worries me how easy it is, how people can just think that life is getting tooo hard with the person they are with and just go off and start again with another person not bothering to give the original relationship the respect and time it deserves. sigh. why are some people like that? why am i even bothered? Another friend called a few days ago, her and her husband again have been having issues, not that he had an affair or anything, just communication issues, turns out she cant have children either, I am not making a correlation here just an observation. She has also found out that she has a tumour on her brain which is affecting her fertility and she has to have an operation, it can be quite dangerous. I am still just stumped as to what she has to go through, radiation, operations, tests, How do you cope with being told that you have a tumour on your brain.. *shakes head* i just dont know. my sister, now divorced, struggling hard with her 2 children money, and a new partner. just really being dragged down by life. another friend, finding that she also cant have children either! but i look at her and her husband and think... boy you wont last, I dont understand how little love there is there. what is it!!!! what makes peoples lives so difficult especially my poor friend who now has to have an operation. The title of this post is "everything for a reason" but what are those reasons. What are people meant to learn from these things, can i learn anything from these things?? why on earth are they affecting me so much at the moment. relationships...... sometimes I think they are just not meant to be. I know that some people get it right, but how come some people end up with those that just hurt them. I get so fed up of having to think that ohh this is a lesson they are meant to be learning, ohh this is just life, they bring it on themselves. This is their journey yada yada. apart from this rather sleepy and depressing posting, i did want to ask people to say a prayer to my friend who is having the operation, she is still waiting for the date to come through, she is so cheery still, she said "well i might be about to die but hey i still look like a super model" i could of cried when she said that. I did a prayer for her over lammas, but I really need some help, and so does she, this is the best place i could think of for positive spiritual energies. I think ive over empathized recently, i feel such a burden on my shoulders, and I feel guilty for making them burdens when they arnt even my problems I am not ill, and i have a healthy child, i should be very grateful. I am not happy though, I dont understand people, I dont understand the reasons, maybe im not meant to. [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] |
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Author: raewytch [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 2/08/07 10:48 jade - you sound like such an empathic person. You also sound like a really good friend - you care so much about your friends and want only the best for them. It sounds very much to me like you are a bit too open at the moment and all these situations are dragging your own energy down too much. Thats not to say you cant be sympathetic and supportive of your friends but perhaps you need to strengthen your own aura/personal space. To be an effective friend and support, you cant allow things to drag you down too. now as to what you were pondering on. yes, you are right, sometimes there is no answer as to why people go through what they do. I do believe we have partly chosen to experience certain things in our lives to develop and learn from, and they can certainly be hard to experience. Its interesting that you have had so many people with fertility problems in your circle of friends at the moment, and also some with relationship problems. Perhaps there is a message here for you too. Not necesserely about relationship or fertility problems that you might have, but some message or signpost for you to think about. Think about what the message might be perhaps you are the kind of person who could be involved in healing of these problems or perhaps something else. Im not saying it is anything in particular just suggesting there is a message of some kind here for you too. Meanwhile try and get more sleep. Look after yourself and build up your own strength. Eat properly and try not to be pulled down by all these sad things around you. Build up your own magical energy circle around you for protection. You certainly sound like the kind of friend I would want supporting me, but you need to be strong to do it. blessings rae [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: jade [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 2/08/07 16:51 Yes your probably right, I do feel very open at the moment, and it makes me vulnerable. Rest assured though I do take good care of myself otherwise. I think its the "helplessness" of the situation really. There doesnt seem to be anything I can do. Although certain elements of sign watching recently, yes has told me that possibly I could help, but where to start hmm im not sure. i was thinking also of the signs of fertility, fertility not just of children but of the mind, creativity and the aspect of allowing us to reach into our inner child when we feel hurt or rejected and soothing that inner child without feeling that we are weak. so yes. its given me things to think about, thankyou rae for your words they were very kind. jade. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Rowan [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 2/08/07 21:37 Somtimes answers are beyond our knowing Jade ... I feel for you in your sadness and send love, light and healing to both you and your friend. Blessings Rowan xxx [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: jade [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 2/08/07 22:04 hey there rowan nice to see ya in here, and hopefully see you again soon. I sent you a mail earlier, so hopefully I will see ya one night this week. namaste moiiii [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Pilgrim [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 3/08/07 5:04 Well I don't have any answers for your questions but I will light a candle and send energy to your friends and you. Blessings. Pilgrim [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Omseeker [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 3/08/07 18:46 It is all just random, nothing personal. Is sad but in nature life does things we interpret as 'bad' or 'good' but its all just part of the cycle. Does not mean it doesn't hurt but it is not personal and nobody is singled out though it feels like that. But the cycle continues always and we experience different parts at different times/ages. Or so I believe, but I am buddhist pagan so i have my own slant, and as an individual my own slant on buddhism! peace omseeker [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: JadeWolf [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 3/08/07 22:30 thankyou and yes actually your all right, and yes Om.. i agree it is part of the cycle, and i also agree that we all have our own paths in this, and that i have suffered just as much as the next person at one point in my life or other. I just wish that there was some way that people could find happiness when it really mattered, or at least gain understanding. lol maybe i should lead them all in here. I found a lot of understanding in here. and great composting tips too! its not all doom and gloom, and i know that people are grateful for their lives in one way or another. thankyou for the thoughts though, and thankyou for the words of love for my friend who will be shortly having brain surgery. I know that the love of many and the positive thoughts of many can change situations for the better. namaste jade [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: jade [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 6/08/07 17:43 hey I just thought id add some nice things to this posting as it was a bit depressing... first off..... a friend of mine had a baby girl last night, I am really so pleased for her as she was told she would never have children. A few months ago a group of people that did a wheel of the year course with me had their dedication ceremonies, it was such a moving event, and my friend also had her blessing ceremony for her and her unborn baby done. (she was the one giving birth last night) anyway...... one of the girls.. that ive mentioned already in my post was trying to get pregnant and hadnt been able to for years even after fertility treatment. well .... i just got a mail from her, she fell pregnant a week after the ceremony and is now 13 weeks pregnant!! how fantastic is that. sooo its not all doom and gloom. I am so pleased for them all its really made me happy. my other friend is still keeping her spirits high, but is finding it hard, she will have brain surgery soon and she might never have children, but like some of you have mentioned, sometimes life can be just as unexpected as expected. and we take what we can from lifes lessons. I would really appreciate it lots if some of you could find the time to say a prayer for my friend who is having the brain surgery done, she is such a lovely girl, always smiling and giving. I know that the power of positive thoughts can change lives. so thankyou once again. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: whitewolf [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 6/08/07 23:51 Sorry Jade, I've come in a bit late - I'm so glad you had some good news too ((hugs)). Your friend is in my thoughts, healing energies find her. Blessings [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: zenwind [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 7/08/07 19:06 No simple answers Jade. *big hug* Tis true people are hurting all around and it is really painful :( Sometimes to me wondering 'why' or if there is or isn't a reason seems beside the point..... but your deep caring, compassion and concern for your friends isn't beside the point.... it is a balm to so many of those that know you. The precious opportunity to give love. Just make sure you take care of yourself too.... and coming to the lovely garden is part of that.... Am thinking and sending love and light to your friend. namaste zenwind [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: jade [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 7/08/07 23:01 I definitely find solace and comfort in here, sounds silly i guess but this place has bought me through some dark times. just with the fact its so full of nice people and love. I have softened a lot since coming in here too lol, its a nice change for me, yes I do care for them a lot. I think people find that strange because outwardly i guess im not much of a people person. But suffering... yes i sometimes see that as un-necessary for people, but each has a path, and ive had my fair share of pain, and i would think i have more to come. just the way of things isnt it.. It does however make me so grateful for what i have, and even what ive been through, even the hard times. In my mind I hold that thought. That these people will eventually feel like I do, that they are content and their hard times taught them about themselves too. That way I would understand and know that all things really are for a reason. well thanks for all the positive thoughts to my friend, i know they will make a difference, to her either coming to terms with it all and her eventual healing. blessings to you. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |