Tips for finding the perfect partner -- Christians and Divorce

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Date Posted: 14:01:09 07/26/01 Thu
Author: firey_eagle
Subject: Tips for finding the perfect partner

The first thing to do is to sit down with pen and paper and think about exactly what you're looking for in a partner. The Spirit qualities are the most important especially if you are looking for a Christian and wish to walk closely with the Lord and work for Him. Tell the Lord what you'd like him/her to like. Maybe you'd like someone who's already in the ministry so you can minister with them. If you have a burden to work with young people maybe you could ask for someone who is in children's ministry so that you would complement them.

Mental or emotional aspects come next. What do you want him/her to be like? Strong and macho, or loving and gentle? Do you want him/her to be a strong leader? Then you can include desires about what he/she must be like, generally. Maybe you want someone who likes skiing so you can enjoy the snow together, or if you enjoy outdoor life you can ask for someone who likes doing the same thing.

Express your desires in the negative sense too. For example, if you absolutely loathe sports it's not going to be good if your partner is a sports coach and is constantly at baseball games. If you do not want something, then make it known on the list as well. Remember, you're beginning to form a picture of what you want, and when you have a clear picture in your mind then your faith can begin to form in a much better and quicker way.

Physical aspects come last, but they are nevertheless important. Must your partner be tall or short, blond or dark-haired? What color must his/her eyes be? Maybe you want someone who's pretty slim and trim, or perhaps you want a well-built, strong, muscular person who likes working out and being fit. Just write it down as you think of it, and begin to visualize him in your mind.

To one friend of mine, the physical side wasn't a major factor to her. He was a bit shorter than what she was used to, but it wasn't a big problem for her. She knew he was the right person and a few inches height difference didn't matter. She wasn't going to reject him just for this reason. It depends on you, though. You have to make the choice as to whether you accept or reject who you meet. The Lord will never force it on you.

When you've written all of these things down, take the paper, hold it up to the Lord and read out what you've written down. Say something like this. ...Lord, I'm asking you for a husband, and these are the things that I desire in him/her... then read out the list. Now stick it up on a wall or place where you will continually see it. Sometimes the fridge door is a good place or next to your computer. Review your list out loud daily, preferably morning and night, and thank the Lord that He's heard you and given you your heart's desire.

To make it more powerful, you can add some scripture promises to it, like ...Whatsoever things you desire, when you pray believe that you receive them and you shall have them... You can quote that scripture, then read out your list and say, ...In the Name of Jesus I thank you Lord that I have received my husband from you. He/she is ... and then read off the list you've made up. Remember, too, to visualize him/her as you speak out your list. Let's face it, if the Lord brings someone your way and you haven't got a mental picture in your mind of who you want, how will you know if he's/she's the right person or not?

As you continue to do this you may not feel anything building up inside of you, and at times it may seem that you aren't likely to meet anyone because your circumstances seem to be pointing that way, but don't give up. One day, suddenly, you will know without a shadow of a doubt that you have your desire. It's kind of like a cork suddenly popping off a bottle. You just suddenly know you have him. The angels are working continually, and the Lord is directing things that you cannot see to bring about this desire. You just have to trust Him because He is working on it for you.

When you reach that point of knowing it is no longer necessary to confess your list unless you want to review it just for yourself, You should have a pretty good picture of what you want in your partner by now. Now all you have to do is thank the Lord and await His perfect timing to meet. Sometimes it can take a long time depending on what you're asking for and how fussy you are. When a lady friends step-daughter prayed for her husband it took 3 years before she got her desire, and she had to move overseas for it to happen. I'm not saying this is what will take place with you, but the Lord could make a way for you to move your location or job in order to fulfil your desire. Just be open to His leading.

In 1989, one lady I knew felt like her world would fall apart after the death of her first husband in January of that year. She had tended to rely on him a lot and he'd always helped her with decision- making and taking charge of things, so now all of a sudden she was on her own and responsible for things that would happen. It was really hard for her to come to grips with things, but it didn't take long for her to decide that she wanted another husband .She really believed that the Lord could give her one and felt she could ask Him for one because she knew He cared about her and wanted the best for her. However, at that time she didn't know what she does now about exercising her faith. The only thing she knew she must do is ...to be specific.

In His Presence,

Janice

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