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| Subject: Bomb | |
Author: Darkerside of light | [ Next Thread |
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] Date Posted: 08:34:13 01/17/08 Thu Bomb Tic tic tic tic The life in front of me Tic tic tic Spare the surgeons knife Tic tic tic You see that these remnants of my life Tic tic tic Any moment now could explode Tic tic tic Any moment now could implode TIC No mercy given TIC No mercy showed TIC Could run TIC Too late to scream I have been deprived! TIC In this unholy mess should I now be glorified? TIC Would you young lady come stay by my side TIC For I see others are leaving TIC Not wanting to share in the grieving TIC Then it’s a few less people and lesser time still TIC What is it? Am I ill? Am I sick? Them It could be you? Time it’s self? TIC I’m deceiving? T……….I………C…….Silence absolute silence In life one rule and what ever that rule is? One thing is for sure I have deceived us all DSL [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] |
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Author: Paul [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 08:59:31 01/17/08 Thu Mark, Simple yet powerful piece here. I think you should perform this at the poets party.I am loving your diversity and twists. Great work, Peace, Paul. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Darkerside of light [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 01:14:31 01/18/08 Fri Hi Paul this poem was probably years in the making when I think about it as I did write something similar 2 or 3 years ago but for sure I'm happier with this and yes I will be reading this one at poets party. Thanking you Paul DSL [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Mireille [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 11:23:35 01/17/08 Thu These tics are screams we hear clearly, Max. Obviously, we're not never safe from being left when we "lose" a part of what we've been at the beginning of a story. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Darkerside of light [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 01:17:28 01/18/08 Fri Hi Mireille Yes i can see where you are coming from Cheers DSL [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Sasha [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 14:10:00 01/17/08 Thu ~ I was expecting the BOOM!!!! :) an effective piece, Mark...cleverly done!!! have you ever read this one out loud to people? *hugs* Sash xx  [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Darkerside of light [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 01:20:33 01/18/08 Fri Hi Sash this poem was years in the making but I only finished writing it the other day,as Paul requested I will be reading this one at Poets Party Cheers DSL [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: andy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 02:16:26 01/18/08 Fri Well the first thing I thought was "This is a poem that should be read out loud" so I am glad to have found out you will be doing just that. Love the chance you take with the repetition. It's not easy to use this effectively. Enjoyed! andy [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Darkerside of Light [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 01:12:30 01/21/08 Mon Good morning andy (9:10 uk time) Pleased you like this poem I will be reading this out at Poets Party and I'll probably read this one at the Poets Cafe(Covent Garden London) along with a few others as part of a practice and a dry one. DSL [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Arunansu [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 04:36:48 01/18/08 Fri Very intense in appeal, DSL. Wonderfully written, my friend. Cheers. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Darkerside of Light [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 01:17:14 01/21/08 Mon Hi Arunansu Pleased you liked this poem as I once said to a poet friend of mine most of the time you have to be in it to write it. Cheers DSL [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Max Hardy [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 01:14:46 01/22/08 Tue Hello DSL Could feel the frenetic questioning building with each tic to start, panic driven, but then the last few lines, filled with an acceptance that if it's going to happen, it's going to happen, no matter what. Feeling this my friend. Enjoyed immensely. Max [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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Author: Darkerside of light [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: 02:32:49 01/23/08 Wed Hi Max It is always so good to hear from you and I thank you from the ink in my pen. DSL [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |